"What dare we hope?"

[teartracks]

Hi Dr. G. and all,

I'm wondering if Nietzsche had voice?  He certainly was and is heard even now through his writing, but was that equal to having voice as we understand it here?  Was he an optimist or a pessimist?  Are one's  written words  equivalent to their spoken word  with both translating as voice.  CB, what do you think? 

 it seems that hope runs through my veins. 

This comes closest to describing how I feel about hope.  I'm grateful to have it from whatever its source.

tt

[Dr. Richard Grossman]

Hi everyone,

Thanks for your thoughtful responses to my brief talk.   Here are some more thoughts based on your comments/questions:


Ami:   "Who is Hildy,if you don't mind my asking?"

Hildy is my wife.


Sunblue:  "However, I maintain that a person’s level of hopefulness can be directly tied to the reality of their life circumstances."

I think this is for the most part, true.  But—1) There are people who have been through horrific experiences—terrible families (even narcissistic!), holocaust/genocide, crippling illnesses, who somehow remain hopeful and positive., and 2)  in situations where there are identical twins raised apart, if one twin has experienced major depression, the odds are 50% that the other has too.   The simplest explanation for these findings is that there is a biological factor in happiness/hopefulness that plays a significant role in how we process our experience of the world.


Bean:    " thank you for sharing that (the essay).  I wonder if this resonates with many?  it seems such an unpopular concept, to give up hope"

If you are lucky enough to have had positive life experiences, and the biology of hope, it probably won’t resonate at all.  If you’ve had one, but not the other, maybe it will resonate a little!


Bella:   "How do you define `hope' personally, Richard? I get the sense that what you are referring to , by my frame of reference, is perhaps `blind faith' or `unrealistic expectations'? But I'd like to hear what you mean from you, if you'd care to explain it."

I define hope as a pleasing feeling of optimism that something I wish for will happen in the future.  I think there is a wide continuum of unrealistic to realistic hopes, and everyone has their own personal measure of this.  I’m referring to my own personal measure, which is pretty stringent—e.g. the reason I’m hopeful that one of my plays will be accepted this years is that the Artistic Director wrote me that a play I submitted was one of her favorites—but the judges thought it was too long.  So, I’ve cut it down.


Bella again:  "setting realistic expectations, visualizing my hopes, and working towards them with a positive attitude."

I think this is great!  Congratulations on the business and your pending marriage!



CB123:  "The hopefulness that I have about life seems to be a kind of background noise that I can't make go away.  It seems to be as much a part of who I am as is the suspicion that drives someone else."

Hmmm…a touch of lucky biology here?!!!   Again, I think shared by most people…e.g. see teartracks' last post.


Gratitude28:  "I am making her wait until she is 8 before she gets a permanent tattoo."

I’m wondering with Lighter:  this is humor right?!!!  Actually, my wife and a number of other women our age kind of like my daughter’s tattoo.  Could this be a father thing?



Teartracks:  I'm wondering if Nietzsche had voice?  He certainly was and is heard even now through his writing, but was that equal to having voice as we understand it here?  Was he an optimist or a pessimist?  Are one's  written words  equivalent to their spoken word  with both translating as voice.

Good questions.  Here’s the wikipedia link:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Friedrich_Nietzsche



Best to everyone,

Richard

[lighter]

Ahhhh... Dr. G.

Forgive me for being so obtuse, up to this point, but....

it honestly never occurred to me that there was a man behind the curtain keeping up with the board.....

but of course you are.

::whispering::

It's your board....

 and I'm so glad it's here.

::resisting urge to picture self with little white ears, whiskers and pink paws::

Please.... share, if you don't mind?

What was your hope when you started this board.....

and how do you feel about it now?

Having come this far and grown so much?

[gratitude28]

Yep, I am totally joking about my daughter for all concerned!!!! Although my husband gave in and got a tattoo at 38, we discourage the kids from doing anything permanent - at least until they are fully on their own and supporting themselves.
I actually like tattoos, and hair dye and all kinds of fun stuff, but I am a wimp and rarely do anything wild!!!!
Thanks for being so thoughtful and taking time to respond to us, Dr. Grossman.
R/Beth

[Bella_French]

Dear Richard,

Thanks for responding; its really nice having a conversation with you, and hearing a bit more about your life. Its probably the case for many of us, but when I joined this site I had read all your essays and I was thinking `this fellow Richard is SUCH a wonderful man. It would be great to chat to him one day about life and universe'. Anyway, so now we have, lol. Its really a very nice experience, so thanks!

Good luck with your play, too. They sound very interested in it, if they are asking you to edit it to better suit their format. What a buzz that would be, to see your story expressed in such a way! I'll cross my fingers for you:)

Have a nice day, Richard!

Regards,
 bella

[teartracks]

Hi,

Hi Dr. G. and all,

I'm wondering if Nietzsche had voice?  He certainly was and is heard even now through his writing, but was that equal to having voice as we understand it here?  Was he an optimist or a pessimist?

I used the Wiki link that Dr. G. provided and that started my search for information about Nietzsche's childhood.   There may be no way to know for sure, but from what I gather, the poor guy probably didn't have  voice as a child.  He was much more the tragic figure than I imagined from reading Beyond Good and Evil many years ago, at which time I concluded that we were not philosophical 'matches'.  Funny how we can read the written works/words of someone like Nietzsche or even people here on the board and forget that they had a real childhood and perhaps even a very tragic one, and that perhaps their childhood was never touched by compassion.  I don't know exactly where I'm going with this.  I think I was surprised in the first place that I asked the question  of whether he had voice as a child.  I think I was surprised by what I perceive to be a likely truth, that he most likely didn't, and that a tender spot has been touched in me about it all.

He was a Philologist, a lover of words.  He was known for his aphorisms as well as his writings on philosophy.
I'm no closer to being his  philosophical 'match'  than I was back in the day, but I do find him a very interesting figure whose life may not be as different from our own as one might imagine.

tt

[Dr. Richard Grossman]

Hi lighter,

You asked:

 "Please.... share, if you don't mind?
What was your hope when you started this board.....
and how do you feel about it now?
Having come this far and grown so much?"

Initially, I hoped that people could share some of their thoughts about voicelessness that they had not been able to in the past.  I still do.  I feel satisfaction that the board has been used as an outlet by—and helped—so many people.  When ultimately I think back about the time I spent trying to make a difference in people’s lives, this board will be a comfort.  That's very important to me. 

Best,

Richard

[Ami]

Richard,
  You made a big difference in MANY people's  lives .                              Ami

[lighter]

Hi lighter,

You asked:

 "Please.... share, if you don't mind?
What was your hope when you started this board.....
and how do you feel about it now?
Having come this far and grown so much?"

Initially, I hoped that people could share some of their thoughts about voicelessness that they had not been able to in the past.  I still do.  I feel satisfaction that the board has been used as an outlet by—and helped—so many people.  When ultimately I think back about the time I spent trying to make a difference in people’s lives, this board will be a comfort.  That's very important to me. 

Best,

Richard

But.... are you surprised at how it actually works.... now?

And is it the vision you had in mind..... is this how you thought it would work?

Or did you see people, coming together in healing... singing the 'Coke' song?

Sans conflic, lol?


After driving meditation this morning.... it came to me....

this place is like a huge group therapy session.... without a therapist

[Dr. Richard Grossman]

Hi lighter,

If I could answer your questions, slightly out of order…

"And is it the vision you had in mind?"

I’m afraid I had no vision.  The site started in 1999 with a group of essays on voicelessness, and the message board was simply a place to respond, interactively.  Slowly, driven by the need for people to express themselves and to share their experiences, the board evolved into its current ethos. 

"..... is this how you thought it would work?"

Again, in the beginning I didn’t think about it working or not working.  Over the years I’ve simply tried, as best I can, to keep the board safe and open.  Not so easy sometimes…     

" Or did you see people, coming together in healing... singing the 'Coke' song?
Sans conflic, lol?"

In the beginning, the conflicts troubled me.  Now, I see them as useful—and enormous learning opportunities for all participants. 


"After driving meditation this morning.... it came to me....
this place is like a huge group therapy session.... without a therapist "
 

Some people use/experience the board this way—which is fine!  Others use it to feel less alone—which is fine!  Others use it for advice—which is fine!  And I'm sure there are 100 other reasons people use it--which are fine!

"Are you surprised at how the board actually works...now?"

No.  Not after all these years!


Best,

Richard

[lighter]

Hi lighter,

If I could answer your questions, slightly out of order…

"And is it the vision you had in mind?"

I’m afraid I had no vision.  The site started in 1999 with a group of essays on voicelessness, and the message board was simply a place to respond, interactively.  Slowly, driven by the need for people to express themselves and to share their experiences, the board evolved into its current ethos. 

"..... is this how you thought it would work?"






Again, in the beginning I didn’t think about it working or not working.  Over the years I’ve simply tried, as best I can, to keep the board safe and open.  Not so easy sometimes…     

" Or did you see people, coming together in healing... singing the 'Coke' song?
Sans conflict, lol?"

In the beginning, the conflicts troubled me.  Now, I see them as useful—and enormous learning opportunities for all participants. 


"After driving meditation this morning.... it came to me....
this place is like a huge group therapy session.... without a therapist "
 

Some people use/experience the board this way—which is fine!  Others use it to feel less alone—which is fine!  Others use it for advice—which is fine!  And I'm sure there are 100 other reasons people use it--which are fine!

"Are you surprised at how the board actually works...now?"

No.  Not after all these years!


Best,

Richard

::realizing I'm peeking under Dr. G's coattails.... and not the Wizard of O's curtain::

Ahem.... sorry Dr. 

::dropping coattails :oops:l::

I keep asking the same question over and over again.... don't I?: /

I can't imagine that this board,

which, for me, has been all the things you've written above, at different times....

wasn't the well thought out brain child of someone who saw a (specific) need.... and filled it.  ::shaking head::

This is THE place to find affordable sanity and you've cared enough to make it available to everyone. 

::resolving to buy Dr. G's book bc there is no tip jar::

Just curiouse.... what did you score on the Meyer's Briggs P test, if you don't mind my asking?

There's gotta be some idealist in there?

And.....

thank you for this board.

It's been more important to me than I can say.

Sincerely,

Lighter

 

[teartracks]

Dr. G.
 

Initially, I hoped that people could share some of their thoughts about voicelessness that they had not been able to in the past.  I still do.  I feel satisfaction that the board has been used as an outlet by—and helped—so many people.  When ultimately I think back about the time I spent trying to make a difference in people’s lives, this board will be a comfort.  That's very important to me. 
 
I think I may have been one of the earliest 'boardettes'.  I'm ashamed to say that on some level back then, I thought the board was a toy.  I misused it.  I'd like to acknowledge that now and publicly apologize to you and any other users from that period that may still be around.    That is quite a turnaround considering that now I'm more like a 'biddy hen' protecting her young.   
 
In the beginning, the conflicts troubled me.  Now, I see them as useful—and enormous learning opportunities for all participants. 
 
I believe as you do.

When you're dandling your grandchildren on your knee, I hope you will find double comfort in knowing that you helped this suffering soul in more ways than she is able to express.

Thank you,
 
tt

[Ami]

[When you're dandling your grandchildren on your knee, I hope you will find double comfort in knowing that you helped this suffering soul in more ways than she is able to express



Dear TT,
   This made me cry. I share your sentiment. When Dr G wrote that he may not cure world hunger etc-that may be true. However, I agree that he is a  very ,great man to give us this medium to regain our precious voices that were silenced by abuse. I will never be able to thank him .                     Ami

[Dr. Richard Grossman]

Hi everyone,

Once again, I want to thank everyone for their thoughts and comments.  Lighter asked:  "Just curious.... what did you score on the Meyer's Briggs P test, if you don't mind my asking?"

INTJ  (On the thinking vs. feeling dimension, though, I'm pretty close to the middle.)

Best,

Richard

[teartracks]

Dear Dr. G.

OMG!   

tt