Shame--- the button has to be on the inside--NOT the outside

[Ami]

  You are scaring me Carolyn(lol)  .  Just kidding---you have a very good point and thank you for it.         Love   Ami

[Certain Hope]

You're welcome, Ami : )  I knew you'd realize that I wasn't tryin to be scary... just that it's so much easier to be prepared for what's sure to come along. It never fails that the moment I resolve to make a positive change, especially in a spiritual matter (and as far as I'm concerned, all these things are spiritual matters), a kazillion different challenges present themselves - hurdles, pits, fiery darts, ICBM's of the spirit world... lol (I am only exaggerating a little)   

Love,
Carolyn

[Gabben]

 What I am seeing is that you cannot give other people power over your "shame "button. If you do, you will be their puppet.
 It is not their fault,but yours.
 
My goal now is to be the master of this "shame " button. Then,I don't have to worry(overly) if it gets pushed. If s/one pushes it, I can refuse to "answer the door"(lol). Sorry for a repitition of the same subject. One of these days, it will heal.(lol)            Ami

I love reading your posts of late because they are full of little wisdoms like the ones above.

[Ami]

Thank you,Lise. God has been so good to me. He has allowed me to heal and I am so grateful. Today, I ate food like a normal person---without stomach aches. I really am amazed how God loves us and how "undeserving" we are -----what little jerks  we are(lol)----speaking for myself ,only,LOL .            Ami

[Leah]

((( Carolyn ))) and ((( Ami )))

Tis' true, the day I don't go round clanging with my full armor on

.... is the day my heels get snapped at!   

Romans 8:28 has been and is, my bedrock

Love & blessings to you both,

Leah

[Gabben]

Thank you,Lise. God has been so good to me. He has allowed me to heal and I am so grateful. Today, I ate food like a normal person---without stomach aches. I really am amazed how God loves us and how "undeserving" we are -----what little jerks  we are(lol)----speaking for myself ,only,LOL .            Ami

The above is so true! God loves us no matter what!  It is we that destroy ourselves and reject his love.

I have been in a similar space lately counting my many, too many, blessings...God is good and He understands that man is fallen in his nature...He grieves for us and only wants to see us happy.

There is a saying in AA: God insists that we enjoy life!"

Lise (((AMI)))

[Ami]

I want to go in to a new phase ,Lise. I see that my M was all about doing "Satan's" bidding---not God's. She didn't know it,of course.When I hate myself, I am doing Satans bidding------bleh.
  Thanks for  your  encouragement,Lise.       Love   Ami

((((((((((Lise))))))))))))

[Ami]

Little by little, I make inroads in to healing shame. Yesterday, I talked to my Aunt for a long time. I see that she is not perfect. She has worries and has fears. She is "stable" and accepts herself,but she is not "perfect". She never asked to be made perfect. I did it.
 I see that she has herself 'in order, though. She has her  self" functioning so  that she can go forward in life without recycling  "garbage", on the hamster wheel, all the time, as I have been doing.
 I want to get to the point where my insides are in order and I can go out in to the world--living in the present----not replaying past dramas all the time------bleh.
 My Aunt does that, I think.
 As far as shame, I  feel more like I am "human",now. My dog does not have to be house trained perfectly, as  a small example(lol)(She is a Yorkie---- notorious for hard housebreaking. )
 I feel like I can express my emotions and thoughts more .Maybe I can own this small square of real estate---me. Maybe,I can  be just OK .         Ami