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Twoapenny:
Thank you again, it does feel uncomfortable but I am sitting with it anyway and things will change at some point.  Thank you xx

Twoapenny:
And just to update a little further - have arranged a Christmas get together with the mums I chat to at swimming (whilst the kids have their lessons).  They're all nice ladies so it will be good to have a proper chat and get to know them a little better.  Have also been thinking about Hopsie's idea about community projects of some sort; at first I was floundering a bit as it's difficult to take my son along to things as he's autistic and prefers being at home but it's also difficult to get babysitters, so I felt a little bit stuck at first.  But this evening I realised that I take him to lots of sports groups for disabled children and I could offer to get involved with fundraising for them or something like that.  So feeling like I'm moving in the right direction.  Thank you :)

lighter:
Tupp:

I like the idea of you expanding into volunteer time with the groups your son's already familiar and comfortable with too.

You do what you can, and in your case you pick and choose the things that won't stress your son, but may perhaps broaden his horizons. 

Lighter

Hopalong:
You are a FABULOUS mother, imo, Tupp.

Doing some of these new things to attend to your own needs as a social being,
is part of being a good mother to him. It will make you wiser, stronger, more confident.

A mom who has community, sees how she truly is always part of something bigger, and has a sense
of perspective, purpose and joy...that's all better for him too.

As to awkwardness in going together with your autistic child, I'm not sure, but I think our
culture understands a lot more than we used to, about autism. And regardless, I know some
communities will do all they can to make you both feel welcome. And sometimes, I think it
helps to inside your head, declare YOURSELF a welcome and worthy part of community.
To see yourself as someone who is valuable, worthwhile, and completely worthy of belonging.

Does he have trouble in public behaving in a "socially acceptable" way, or is he just his
quirky spectrum self? I believe it is a GIFT to communities to have opportunities to learn
how to get along and interact with those who are different. Boosts the humanity of us all.

I think you have terrific instincts.

hugs
Hops

Twoapenny:
Thank you Lighter, I was wondering how I'd find more time to do things and then realised there are probably things I can do at groups we already go to, even if it's just staying behind for ten minutes to help tidy up.

Thank you, Hopsie, for such a lovely compliment.  It's not his behaviour that's a problem he's generally very good, it's more that he finds all sorts of situations stressful and if he gets too stressed out by things (even things he likes can stress him out because he's so sensitive to noise, certain kinds of lights etc) it really wipes him out for a couple of days and makes him unhappy.  Sometimes we've been to a new group or activity and something about it has made him just refuse to even enter the building and there's nothing on earth that will get him inside!  Even if I was a forcing kind of a person (which I'm not) he's bigger than me so I can't do anything about it.  But regardless, I will keep my eyes and ears open, now that I'm open to the idea I will probably see something that's worth a try and we will definitely give something new a go :) xx

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