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Just the crap I've been up to - LOL

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sKePTiKal:
Tupp, mostly I just let the OCD take over and work for HOURS without consciously thinking about it. I forget to eat, even. It seems I "know" - without making a conscious decision or going through any elaborate thought process, just what needs to be done. Most of the time, I poop out physically before the OCD considers the job "done". It's very much like being in a creative "zone". And it's honestly very good for me. But other people around usually disrupts that process. Holly's seen it all her life, so she knows to just stand back & watch. LOL... she does the same thing herself. And when she's doing it with my "stuff"... there's usually a hissy-fit about to burst forth on my part.

Last time, I explained to her that I'm worried I won't be able to find anything because I didn't "put it" where it is now. She adjusted and said: you can SEE it all... I'm not hiding anything on you. Our brains organize a tad differently. It's nice we can each have those moments - exposing our anxieties, quirks and oddities - and even yell at each other... and 5 minutes later just sit down and talk rationally about the issue, once the emotional bubble has burst. I don't think either of us can do that with anyone else.

This whole week, I've been operating at hyperspeed. No idea WHY. There is a lot going on, and I'm forced to multi-task, like it or not - I have to take phone calls, answer emails and sign docs online for realtors. In between cleaning toilets, wrapping presents, making shopping lists for baking and getting cars inspected. And yes, I've screwed up and forgotten things I was going to do - just because it seems I'm on some different wavelength than when I made the plans in my head. Wacky.

Then, an old song comes on the radio and the tears are leaking again - more missing Mike.

And I'm sleeping well, my kitties are just delightful lately, Holly's adventure is coming to a close and she'll be headed home soon. I've decided she's living her life in total denial of her age... or maybe it's disdain, I'm not sure. (But I know I will hear ALL about it...) So I've decided it's a F*** Forty Birthday Party. "Pizza" was one of her first words... one of her friends makes great pizza dough... so Matt & I have conspired to pull together a "make your own pizza" party with all kinds of toppings. Matt's been experimenting with making filled soft pretzels... and that's the perfect food for one of our "free for all" house parties. I guess I'll make rum cupcakes or something rediculous like that.

All the women in Matt's life have unintentionally gotten on the same wavelength for his Christmas presents this year. He is the "grillmaster"... and Thanksgiving's smoked turkey was as moist as anything I've ever tasted. His mom is getting a really good chef's knife, Holly found some sauces/spices I think... I've found him a good "hot ash" can... smoking chips... cedar planks... some dry rubs...now he just needs some exotic meats to cook. LOL.

Matt & I get along pretty well - we get on a creative wavelength and can push each other along. Having them around is almost ALWAYS (not always) fun. They have relationship issues they're trying to work out. And Holly is working out her conflicted brain/feelings to some kind of resolution. I try to guide, not overstep my bounds, and make gentle suggestions here & there to both of them.... and DUCK. I'm much more inhibited about letting the inner Viking run loose than Holly is. She's been journaling on her sea voyage... and that's a good good thing for her.

Hopalong:
Oh wow. What an amazing post.

1) Your productivity absolutely dazzles me, and I so loved glimpsing how it actually feels not so much like work as like...flow. I am glued to these works-in-progress stories of yours and maybe that's why. I can get a vision of a person who has that very strong current of productive flow going on, amidst whatever's also good or bad, in her life. The flow is truly remarkable and the productivity absolutely awesome to me. I am grateful to read these stories, of your rootedness in place and thing and movement.

2) The song and tears for Mike break my heart for you. But I get sweet grief. (((((((((Amber)))))))))

3) You've still made awesome family. The energies you describe, and the moments, and the sharing (and caring, even seeking out the right chips for Matt) are heartwarming to read about. And insightful.

I hope it's joyful all around.

Merries!

xo
Hops

sKePTiKal:
YEE HAW.

We are now past the due diligence deadline on the sale of the beach house. So, it's good as sold. It's the only mortgage I've got... so the first champagne flute I grabbed was Mike's from our wedding. Fitting. He would appreciate how this sale has gone - and how realtor & I were ready for this particular buyer - so, here's to Mike and all he taught me.

Time to burn bridges in Rambo style and move ON.

Hopalong:
Wow, kudos and WHEW!

What amazing timing.

Very Merry Christmas....and what a gift to have that happen now.
I'm feeling all Waltonsy just thinking about it.

Yay! Now you can make one home real home, without cobwebs.

Oh goody.

 :D

lighter:
Congrats, Amber.

Here's to a New Year with less stuff, and more time, for the things and people we love.

Lighter

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