S**t happens

[Hopalong]

Well this is just one of my late-night, dump-anxiety-on-the-Amazons posts.

I've had a few symptoms and am concerned about the possibility, hopefully remote, of colon cancer. (I read a lot to my dismay, used to write about health and medicine...). Anyway, had a consultation today (amazingly they had a cancellation and saw me within an hour) and will do a colonoscopy on the 15th. Had one a few years back, I'm not overdue, but they said let's do it. I'm glad because waiting is the tough part.

There, now I can go back to a bit of escapism. But it is a little scary. I don't want to predict anything but will say I feel concerned. FWIW.

Then again even if the news weren't great, I have a friend who had some surgery for this several few years back. Clean, done, no recurrences. Here's hoping it's all a false alarm. And that if it's not I behave like a grownup.

love,
Hops

[Twoapenny]

Oh Hops.  I am sorry to read that you have this worry at the moment.  Even when a remote possibility, just a small doubt can weigh so heavy and it's very hard to keep your mind on other things (a bit like that thing when someone says "don't think about pink elephants" and then that's all you can keep in your mind ).  I'm glad they are seeing you quickly - can they give an answer on the 15th or will it be a little after that.  I think not behaving like a grown up is acceptable on some occasions   Do you have to travel far for the colonoscopy or is the hospital quite close by? xx

[Hopalong]

Thanks, ((((Tupp))).
It's one of those things, just gotta wait until it's a real elephant or turns out to be a mouse. Squeak.

Their office is 5 minutes from my house and and they have a suite in the same building, so I'm having it done there. Not sure if I'll have to wait for the exam results or if this doc will tell me what he saw/didn't see immediately. A friend will take me, wait, then drive me home. One thing I love about where I live is that everything is 5-10 minutes from my house. Doctor, bank, library, cafes, shopping, drugstore. I could even walk to this doctor's if I wanted, it's about a mile (but too cold).

What I remember about the last one was the nap I had afterward (anesthesia lingering) was the sweeeeeeeetest sleep I can ever recall since childhood. So another one of those will be nice!

This probably sounds stupid but this morning with sun streaming in, pooch curled into her warm little doughnut shape at the foot of the bed, heater plugging away, I feel lucky regardless. Given my job, there's a whole lot of mortality going around in general, so a wee reminder of my own isn't a bad thing. (Concentrate the mind, get me focused, kind of thing.) But I sure hope it's nothing.

I'll update when I know more. Very comforting to have discharged the anxiety here.

hugs and thanks,
Hops

[Twoapenny]

I will be crossing my fingers for mouse, Hops, but I don't think it's silly at all to feel lucky curled up in a warm bed with lovely pooch at your feet and a bit of sunshine on your face   Appreciating what we have even whilst worrying about other things can only be a good thing.  I'm glad the office is quite close by and that you have a friend to take you there (and yes, those naps are amazing, there's napping and then there's napping!).  I hope they're able to put your mind at rest quickly and that you get more sun and pooch time in the meantime  ((((((((((((Hopsie )))))))))))))))) xx

[lighter]

I hope everything turns out ok, Hops.

Lighter

[sKePTiKal]

Dammit Hops... you're not allowed to have anything big healthwise to deal with. I said so. LOL.

That's as far I'm going with the denial.    It has to be our age group and the natural order of things, that we have health issues. But, I'm always going to put up huge resistance when it's someone I truly care about.

Since Mike's passing, I've been connecting with and supporting women nursing their terminal husbands and fresh widows... and even some like me, that are further down the recovery road. So, I am still super-sensitive emotionally to even the IDEA that someone MIGHT have a potentially serious issue... despite completely understanding intellectually, the circle of life nature of things.

I'm going to focus on the results of the test coming back completely clear.

[Hopalong]

Awww, bless ya. All-a ya.

(((((((((())))))))))))

Oddly I'm not anxious any more (dumped it on you guys instead).
I think it'll be just fine and the gastro guy will tell me, just go home and eat prunes, you twit.

But either way, LARGELY because y'all are here...I truly am not tearing myself up about it. I do think it'll be okay but also have a sense that well, if it weren't, I'd figure out how to deal with that too. One thing at a time.

Thank you for caring. Really. I feel it.

MWAHHHHH,
love,
lots of it,
Hops

[JustKathy]

Hey Hops, so sorry you're having to deal with this worry and anxiety, but glad it helped to be able to share it here. I'm so very grateful to have this board for that exact reason. I know it's helped me with my own anxiety many, many times. Thinking of you and hope everything goes well on the 15th.

Sending cyber hugs your way....
Kathy

[Hopalong]

Thank you (((((((((Kathy)))))))),

Been so nice to hear your voice again.

Happy New Year to you too!

hugs
Hops

[Hopalong]

The prep went fine, though I loathed it of course.
The procedure today went fine too and I have the "colon of a 25 y.o."

There is nothing at all wrong, and they speculate the symptoms were
the result of spasms I didn't realize I was having. Transient, and nothing
to worry about. I get to do it again....in 10 years.

Happy day, relief and feeling grateful!

thanks for listening as you always do,
xxoo
Hops

[Twoapenny]

The prep went fine, though I loathed it of course.
The procedure today went fine too and I have the "colon of a 25 y.o."

There is nothing at all wrong, and they speculate the symptoms were
the result of spasms I didn't realize I was having. Transient, and nothing
to worry about. I get to do it again....in 10 years.

Happy day, relief and feeling grateful!

thanks for listening as you always do,
xxoo
Hops

Oh wow, Hops, that's amazing news, this has made my day!  How nice to know that, not only is there no problem, you're actually very fit and healthy!  That's so fantastic, is there the possibility of a little celebration? xx

[sKePTiKal]

Good deal Hops! Now, you can eliminate that worry off the list. Onwards! 

(Holly is currently obsessed with the state of MY health and trying to judge me by the same criteria she uses for herself........ sigh. 20 years age difference and a man who insisted I sit next to him while he napped for years has definitely sapped a lot of my strength/stamina. What she doesn't know, is that I AM working on getting it back... but I can't go at her pace doing so. The myopia of the young... and fear, born out of genuine caring... sometimes it's giant PITA.)

[JustKathy]

Congratulations, Hops! So glad to hear everything went well.

[Hopalong]

Thanks, Kathy, me too!

(Now if I only had the ASS of a 25 year-old...but I guess that would require a different sort of doctor....)

 

[lighter]

::Doing the happy dance!::.

Woo hoo, Hops.  The colon of a 25yo.

That's impressive..... I think; )
Lighter