Christmas and box opening

[bunny]

<<<try getting dirty movies for Christmas.  I was so upset inside that it really has screwed me up inside about gifts.  It made me feel worthless because Christmas is supposed to be a time where you share your love for each other.  The year before I got playboy mugs.  I wish I understood these gifts and why they were purchased.  I dont subscribe and I never asked for any such thing.  Merry Christmas.>>>

Did you tell her this hurt you? Did you ask her why she bought these items for you? If you let this incident screw up getting gifts -forever - from normal people, that is something you might want to work on. It's not fair to you or to well-intentioned people who give you gifts.

bunny

[Anonymous]

<<Did you tell her this hurt you? Did you ask her why she bought these items for you?>>

I can see the into the future to the reponse right now.What he has been saying all along is that he doesn't know-- and lord-- don't feed on the fire and get him started on that story once again.He should take your advice to forget it and not let it affects all other relatonship.

How'z this: since n's have so much troubles emotionally in relationship they often focus on more outer parts of relationship-like physical sex.this is true.Since he said she was not there emotionally it fits well and what she did could have been an example of that kinds of behavior.no big story behind it--just what we can expect from the mind of a narc.  

Just leave it there and don't let it bother _any_ of your other gift things with womens guy.she is out of your life in reality but _you_ can keep her in it forever by your thoughts.thats scary so thinks about it.

[Anonymous]

My mother always gives me Christmas gifts that are suited for a child...many were Christmas "decorations"....toys, really.   Beautiful, lovely things but completely inappropriate for an adult.   I'm sure we can all figure out the psychology behind that strategy!  Even after I refused to put these things out in my home, stating that I enjoyed a more simplistic Christmas decor with candles and fresh greens....they just kept on coming.

This year,  when I unpacked my Christmas decorations I took some of these pretty things and added them to the Christmas gifts I had purchased for my nieces and nephews and the rest I donated to a charity shop.  I only kept those special things that were actually FROM my CHILDHOOD!  

It sure made me feel better!   Heaven knows, most of the gifts I have ever given my mother (even those she specifically asked for) have ended up being given back to me or given to someone else or given to charity.  I don't know why I felt obligated for years to keep the things she had given me but I am not going to do it anymore.

[Dawning]

Thank you everyone for the suggestions you have given and the support you have offered.

Yes, boxes still unopened.  I have gotten myself so busy and stretched myself thin with deadlines.  A death in November, etc.  And, as I leave tomorrow, I don't have the time or the inclination to deal with those boxes.  Plus, my *mommy* reminded me that *Santy Claus* doesn't come until the 24th so I had better not open them until then.  

Therefore, I will open them upon my return.  I thank you all on this thread and wish you a holiday season that is content and basically peaceful.

Love,
Dawning.