Voicelessness and Emotional Survival > Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board
Mindfulness and codependence thread
lighter:
I'm positive pretty jarred tomatoes, lined up on a shelf like soldiers, is more satisfying to use than bagged tomatoes taking up valued freezer space, but that's how I do it. Blanch, peel, bag and freeze.
It's impressive you actually cook them down a bit, with seasoning.
I can't wait to hear about your garden and canning sessions. I hope we all have luck growing things.
Lighter
lighter:
The neighbor's BBQ was so nice... not a moment of regret or discomfort. They're very genuine, kind, funny and make really good burgers, and brats. I had a burger and a brat... baked beans, half a gf bun, beautiful greens and a slice of tomato. THANK YOU. So good. We ate in front of an outdoor fireplace the husband built himself from the ruins of their burned down interior fireplace. I guess they gutted the house in 2006. They had a bunny who needed food. The mom left something on the stove when she went to get bunny food and so the dad turned the stones around and used them to make the fireplace and a beautiful retaining wall. So creative and competent. Everyone chimed in.. two of their daughters were home from University, one with a bf in tow. One dd, 6"1', btw... worked on making a fire of wet wood till she got the job done. After dinner the kids did the dishes without being told. They're bunny people!
The mom, who runs a 100-bed hospital about a half-hour away, seemed a bit frazzled. She said they need to keep half the beds full of COVID patients to keep the system running and achieve herd immunity. They take the temp of everyone who walks in the door, which is frustrating for her to pay an expensive nurse to do that. Also, measuring everyone's oxygen levels is super frustrating bc it takes a while to get an accurate reading AND there's no reliable way to know if an asymptomatic person has the virus without testing. There are still parts of State who don't have the ability to test the number of people who need testing, and demands are being made they do it anyway, which is crazy making. We sat around and played with pulse oximeters while oldest dd explained why they work... she's a bio tech major. Very interesting. We were seeing which PO was most reliable. The one from China did as a good a job as the others. They all seemed to be working fine and I borrowed one to test youngest dd, which I did when I got home. I ordered one for us, and will return this one today. I really like these guys. Their new very large puppy jumped up, mostly on me, a bit. I hate being perceived as the weakest link and tried to train him into better habits, but he was so fluffy and adorable. I just couldn't be stern proactively. My first instinct was to adore him.
They had gf cookies... very yummy.... and the oldest dd made lemon bars. The dad showed me his Ukelele building workshop... he also builds guitars and banjos. They're beautiful. Most have Kona wood faces.... mother of pearl inlay on some. Just beautiful to look at. I wish my youngest had gone with me and played some. She wasn't feeling it and I didn't mind the separation for a few hours. We've had a lot of together time. The other mom was struggling a bit with a new puppy and kids in the house after 4 years of having the house basically to her and her husband, but she remained nice and didn't complain... just mentioned the difference in their lives, along with the COVID situation. It's a lot.
She said her hospital began theoretical discussions about Covid when it seemed unreal, but this prepared them well ahead. They always wear masks when they go out and don't understand people who won't wear them.
Today they'll show me how they cut through the neighborhood on foot to get to my yard from theirs.
I don't think I've ever been to a gathering that didn't suck the life out of me, at least a bit. I'm sure part of it was not having to cook or clean or worry about people getting along. I don't feel anything but energized and well fed. This is new.
Lighter
Hopalong:
Lighter you have been SO enjoying your neighbors, it sounds like you're really creating community for yourself. Bravo. And that party sounded like social heaven right now.
How did everyone manage social distancing? I've limited myself to one-on-one (occasionally the couple next door) visits in the yard eight feet apart, nobody handling anyone else's food/plate/glass. I set wine on a tray on a bench another six feet away and when s/he needs a refill I literally take their glass with a paper towel and pour them more. Same for ferrying their glass or snack plate into the dishwasher. May seem extreme but it makes everybody more relaxed.
Cases are mounting fairly quickly in our area. Fourteen new cases today when it was three just a few days ago. Total cases are 416; 20 have died. I'm not crazy about those odds so I'm not "opening up" even though public restrictions are easing some. I do know how healing it's been to have the weekly backyard visits though; it makes a huge difference.
Stay safe and stay happy!
hugs
Hops
lighter:
CB and Hops:
We had chairs spaced appropriately, in a circle, not 8 feet apart...maybe 6 feet....around a little table, in front of the fireplace. That was the main group area. Wine was poured into our glasses without being handled by the one doing the pouring.
We served ourselves food, one at a time, using our clean utensils to get the burger or beans.
We ate in our chairs, plates in our laps... wine on the little table.
The dad gave me a short tour of the house and workroom.... we weren't ever close to each other and it didn't feel weird. It's starting to feel normal, I guess.
I like to have an antibac wipe IN my hand as I navigate stores or social gatherings. I wipe my hands, and things and handles and it's second nature now. I squirt hand sanitizer into the wipe when it's too dry to use. I found 4 small bottles of grapefruit hand sanitizer in my sock drawer and they smell divine. Very happy with that.
Things felt very normal. No one tried to hug or get close. Everyone was pretty sober. I think that makes a big difference. The people who drink too much forget about social distancing, IME. I had zero sense these folks would step in close or touch my glass. I don't know why they assumed I'd keep my distance, but they seemed relaxed and I guess I didn't give them reason to feel tense.
I have no problem stopping people from hugging me now, btw. A couple hugs got by in the beginning... it felt shocking to stop people at first, but I'm over that. It's as much for their good as mine, so that's how I look at it. it helps.
Lighter
CB123:
Grapefruit hand sanitizer!
Now on my wish list!
CB
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