Hello Mary and Everyone,
I'd like to comment about this 'interest in mothers' thing.
My ex idealised motherhood and was fascinated by seeing women displaying maternal feelings. He really seemed to worship his own mother, and when he was in one of his depressed phases he would often tell me that his mother was the only person who cared about him. (I apparently didn't.)The strange thing was that he also seemed to feel quite controlled by her.I saw a photo of her once and she looked like a tough nut. However she seemed to be a heroine to him.
As Brigid says, single mums are vulnerable, so please take care Mary. My ex's girlfriend,(the one he's recently had a baby with,) already has a son. When my ex was first getting to know her, my ex told me that she liked him because he got on so well with her son, who by all accounts was a bit of a tearaway. But soon after he dumped me and moved in with his new girlfriend, my ex told me that he couldn't stand the son anymore, and that he'd actually suggested to the gf that her son should go and live with his grandparents instead! (I don't know how the relationship is now between my ex and the son.) My point is, for Mary and anyone else reading this,be careful...if one of these manipulative people wants to get in your good books, they could try to do it by befriending your children, at least initially.
Finally, what Brigid said about her husband confusing her with his mother and so not wanting to be sexual with her, reminded me of something my ex once said to me; ie. that if a woman he was with had a baby, there were some sexual practices that he would not be able to do with her anymore, because it would make her 'unclean' for the baby.Therefore, he said, he would have to find somebody else to meet these particular needs for him.
Thinking of you,
Lara.