Dreams anyone?

[Sela]

Hiya Bliz:

re your dreams....who's body was freeze dried?  Maybe that was a bit of aggression coming out in your dream, if the body belonged to your es?  Sorry, I don't know your story but I'm wondering if you might be subconsciously worried about your ex having many partners (either prior to or during your relationship with him) and thus the aids thingy?  Maybe just fear coming out?  If so, a good thing, imo.

Wellllll.... I had a strange dream last night.  It was about Stormy (hiya Stormy....thinking about you in my dreams!!! ).

In my dream, I found out that Stormy works about 6 miles from here at the zoo (not as some cage cleaner but as a very important animal biologist, who is helping the zoo determine all kinds of important stuff to do with caring for the animals/diseases/feeding/socialization etc).  I called the zoo and managed to arrange meeting Stormy at a coffee shop.  Once there, I told her that she is a wonderful person doing an important and very wonderful job, that she is a good, kind, loving person who has had bad experiences, that she has been hurt and she really deserves to heal.  I said:  "Stormy, I don't like reading about you having bad thoughts about yourself or ending your life.  I look up to you and I want you to try harder to appreciate yourself and reward yourself for all you do."  Stormy looked quite shocked at my words and didn't say anything, so I continued saying:
"Stormy, I accept you the way you are and I will be your friend.  Please don't be so hard on yourself".

Wish you did work in the zoo near here and we could meet for a chat and a hug, Stormy!   I guess I got the feeling that you are upset right now and I truly believe you deserve much better and that there will be happier times ahead for you.  At the very least, these must be strong hopes for you, for me to dream of them.

((((((Stormy)))))

Sela

[bliz]

Hi Sela,
I don tknow whose body was freeze dried in my dream.  It was a dream that seemed to come out of nowhere and I couldnt figure out the analogies.  The ex didnt sleep with other women and we were both tested before so doubt that was it, although I do appreciate the insight.  It could be a general dream about him being, "sick", since he tried to reach me last week.  Dont know. Just seemed odd enough to share.

[unknown]

--

On a different note, the ex called out of the blue and left a message on the answering machine.  I was shocked.  Thought he was so mad at me he would leave me alone.  His message was like nothing bad had ever happened between us.  Like we were old friends and he was just checking up on me.  I couldnt believe his short memory and gall.  Naturally did not call him back.  Looks like he tried to call again last night.  Yuck!!

About calling up as if nothing bad is happened, i think that is something
that borderline is likely to do and maybe narcissists too.
Any thoughts if narcissist are as likely, less likely, or more likely
to do this. i kind of think borderlines are more likely to do this....
that kind of back and forth thing they do more where one moment someone
is wonderful, the next, horrible...

[Sela]

Hiya Bliz:

It could be a general dream about him being, "sick", since he tried to reach me last week.  Dont know. Just seemed odd enough to share.

Now I get it.  He phoned and thennnnnn you had this dream.  I bet you're right about the dream being related to that event (phone call).  He's freeze dried inside and out?  And sick too!  That makes sense.

Well....I'm not much help but I appreciate you sharing.  It helps me to know that I'm not the only one with some really odd/strange/weird dreams.  It's probably a good thing that you dream like that, after such events.  It's another release, I think.  Even if we don't always understand it.

Hope you are having some pleasant dreams too!

  Sela

[unknown]

My dreams have been very vivid lately and seem to be about a variety of issues including the ex.  Had an elaborate medical dream last night where a body was freeze dried and then brought back to life to test for AIDS I believe.  Dont know what that was all about.  Another very sad dreaam about my nieces growing up. Sad in the fact that the older ones already do not want to spend as much time with me as when they were younger and that the younger ones were now older too.  It is inevitable and I know why I dreamed that.

On the medical dream---the freeze dried body could be becoming emotional and cold about
Past issues for self protection and now that you have a bit more understanding… reawakening
Those emotions to better examine what kind of sickness they might have encompassed to
Overcome more aspects of it on a deeper level..

The nieces dream could be about difficulty with what apostle paul
Says when one matures one puts away childish things….

[bliz]

Thanks all for the help on dream imterpretation. I was having some elaborate dream again last night when I dreamed I had sex wth the ex...Yikes!!  That could have been triggered by me having a date today.  The funny part was he had a nipple ring in the dream and I was thinking..oh yea, that is so like you to do something that you think is cool,  but is actually ridiculous. After all he is 48 now.  I have been having some hormonal issues so that could also be why I am dreaming so vividly and about the ex. Thanks for listening.

[knu]

Thanks all for the help on dream imterpretation. I was having some elaborate dream again last night when I dreamed I had sex wth the ex...Yikes!!  That could have been triggered by me having a date today.  The funny part was he had a nipple ring in the dream and I was thinking..oh yea, that is so like you to do something that you think is cool,  but is actually ridiculous. After all he is 48 now.  I have been having some hormonal issues so that could also be why I am dreaming so vividly and about the ex. Thanks for listening.

well now, now one might be becoming curiouser and curiouser about
what pray tell might be some of the elaborate part of your dream...oops
..well the dream before more ...just hit me that maybe all the elaborate part of
this dream could be x-rated but ifn there were parts that were elaborate
and not x-rated that could be helpful for dream interpretation possibly.

age 49 is some metaphysical systems can be a very potent transformation year.

often part of the narcissist agenda is to pick up on anothers deeper fears and desires
and yet keep it hidden how they are able to yank around another's energies
up and down.
if they havent moved to a more full blown psychopath i think
they tend to be less aware of the specifics of how they do that.
so that narcissitic connections might come into play
when one is trying to deal with intense and hidden aspects of self.

[October]

Two nights ago I dreamed that I went for a routine hospital appointment (not sure what kind), and there was some confusion.  Lots of whispering in corners, before a nurse came and told me I needed a different ward, and she would take me there.  She took me on a long journey, even including a bus ride across town to somewhere totally new.  I was very confused and bewildered, and eventually asked where we were going, and she said we were nearly there.  Somehow I realised from what she was not saying that she was taking me to a secure unit, to be commited.  (This is one of my greatest fears.)  We eventually reached the building, and she took me into the hospital shop and started buying me supplies such as toothpaste and toilet rolls ( ) and I thought, good grief, how long does she think I am going to be here for?  But we never got as far as the unit itself. 

Last night I had another hospital appointment dream.  There were a whole lot of people sitting and waiting, and we were in the same room as the doctor and the patient he was looking at, and he started talking to all of us, as if we were trainee doctors, telling us all about the patient, and what was wrong with him (I think he had renal failure or something).  It was very interesting stuff, but not at all private or confidential for the poor soul being examined.  And my name got forgotten, and I missed my place, but I wasn't sorry, because although I knew I needed to see the doctor, I preferred not being examined in public.  My dream version of group therapy, I think that is.

Pretty sure this relates to the confusion with my therapy, and a growing doctor phobia.  I need to make an appointment to get C some new medication on Monday.  That one I can do.  For myself, it is not so easy.

I just remembered another one from last night; visiting a very old friend - my oldest friend in fact.  She worked in a big company, in an office.  I was talking to her and she mentioned a vacancy in the company, and as she described it I realised that it was exactly what I could do; everything they wanted I had lots of experiece of, and felt I could do well.  But when I mentioned that to her, she told me not to apply, because she didn't think I would get the job.  She told me that after all this time nobody would want me, and that it would be embarrassing for her if I tried.  She would prefer me to apply to another company, rather than the one she already worked for.

If she had said this in reality, it would have been really hurtful, and also nothing like this friend, who is very loving and supportive.  So it is me saying it to myself really.  Which is true enough.   

[bliz]

I finallly had another hormone screen and certain levels are way up.  This could be why I am having these elaborate dreams and not sleepoing that well.  TO an other ladies of a certain age, that may be part of the issue.

[gnroustic]

Two nights ago I dreamed that I went for a routine hospital appointment (not sure what kind), and there was some confusion.  Lots of whispering in corners, before a nurse came and told me I needed a different ward, and she would take me there.  She took me on a long journey, even including a bus ride across town to somewhere totally new.  I was very confused and bewildered, and eventually asked where we were going, and she said we were nearly there.  Somehow I realised from what she was not saying that she was taking me to a secure unit, to be commited.  (This is one of my greatest fears.)  We eventually reached the building, and she took me into the hospital shop and started buying me supplies such as toothpaste and toilet rolls ( ) and I thought, good grief, how long does she think I am going to be here for?  But we never got as far as the unit itself. 

Last night I had another hospital appointment dream.  There were a whole lot of people sitting and waiting, and we were in the same room as the doctor and the patient he was looking at, and he started talking to all of us, as if we were trainee doctors, telling us all about the patient, and what was wrong with him (I think he had renal failure or something).  It was very interesting stuff, but not at all private or confidential for the poor soul being examined.  And my name got forgotten, and I missed my place, but I wasn't sorry, because although I knew I needed to see the doctor, I preferred not being examined in public.  My dream version of group therapy, I think that is.

Pretty sure this relates to the confusion with my therapy, and a growing doctor phobia.  I need to make an appointment to get C some new medication on Monday.  That one I can do.  For myself, it is not so easy.

I just remembered another one from last night; visiting a very old friend - my oldest friend in fact.  She worked in a big company, in an office.  I was talking to her and she mentioned a vacancy in the company, and as she described it I realised that it was exactly what I could do; everything they wanted I had lots of experiece of, and felt I could do well.  But when I mentioned that to her, she told me not to apply, because she didn't think I would get the job.  She told me that after all this time nobody would want me, and that it would be embarrassing for her if I tried.  She would prefer me to apply to another company, rather than the one she already worked for.

If she had said this in reality, it would have been really hurtful, and also nothing like this friend, who is very loving and supportive.  So it is me saying it to myself really.  Which is true enough.   

[gnroustic]

Two nights ago I dreamed that I went for a routine hospital appointment (not sure what kind), and there was some confusion.  Lots of whispering in corners, before a nurse came and told me I needed a different ward, and she would take me there.  She took me on a long journey, even including a bus ride across town to somewhere totally new.  I was very confused and bewildered, and eventually asked where we were going, and she said we were nearly there.  Somehow I realised from what she was not saying that she was taking me to a secure unit, to be commited.  (This is one of my greatest fears.)  We eventually reached the building, and she took me into the hospital shop and started buying me supplies such as toothpaste and toilet rolls ( ) and I thought, good grief, how long does she think I am going to be here for?  But we never got as far as the unit itself. 

Last night I had another hospital appointment dream.  There were a whole lot of people sitting and waiting, and we were in the same room as the doctor and the patient he was looking at, and he started talking to all of us, as if we were trainee doctors, telling us all about the patient, and what was wrong with him (I think he had renal failure or something).  It was very interesting stuff, but not at all private or confidential for the poor soul being examined.  And my name got forgotten, and I missed my place, but I wasn't sorry, because although I knew I needed to see the doctor, I preferred not being examined in public.  My dream version of group therapy, I think that is.

Pretty sure this relates to the confusion with my therapy, and a growing doctor phobia.  I need to make an appointment to get C some new medication on Monday.  That one I can do.  For myself, it is not so easy.

I just remembered another one from last night; visiting a very old friend - my oldest friend in fact.  She worked in a big company, in an office.  I was talking to her and she mentioned a vacancy in the company, and as she described it I realised that it was exactly what I could do; everything they wanted I had lots of experiece of, and felt I could do well.  But when I mentioned that to her, she told me not to apply, because she didn't think I would get the job.  She told me that after all this time nobody would want me, and that it would be embarrassing for her if I tried.  She would prefer me to apply to another company, rather than the one she already worked for.

If she had said this in reality, it would have been really hurtful, and also nothing like this friend, who is very loving and supportive.  So it is me saying it to myself really.  Which is true enough.   

Two nights ago I dreamed that I went for a routine hospital appointment (not sure what kind), and there was some confusion.  Lots of whispering in corners, before a nurse came and told me I needed a different ward, and she would take me there.  She took me on a long journey, even including a bus ride across town to somewhere totally new.  I was very confused and bewildered, and eventually asked where we were going, and she said we were nearly there.  Somehow I realised from what she was not saying that she was taking me to a secure unit, to be commited.  (This is one of my greatest fears.)  We eventually reached the building, and she took me into the hospital shop and started buying me supplies such as toothpaste and toilet rolls ( ) and I thought, good grief, how long does she think I am going to be here for?  But we never got as far as the unit itself. 

Last night I had another hospital appointment dream.  There were a whole lot of people sitting and waiting, and we were in the same room as the doctor and the patient he was looking at, and he started talking to all of us, as if we were trainee doctors, telling us all about the patient, and what was wrong with him (I think he had renal failure or something).  It was very interesting stuff, but not at all private or confidential for the poor soul being examined.  And my name got forgotten, and I missed my place, but I wasn't sorry, because although I knew I needed to see the doctor, I preferred not being examined in public.  My dream version of group therapy, I think that is.

Pretty sure this relates to the confusion with my therapy, and a growing doctor phobia.  I need to make an appointment to get C some new medication on Monday.  That one I can do.  For myself, it is not so easy.

I just remembered another one from last night; visiting a very old friend - my oldest friend in fact.  She worked in a big company, in an office.  I was talking to her and she mentioned a vacancy in the company, and as she described it I realised that it was exactly what I could do; everything they wanted I had lots of experiece of, and felt I could do well.  But when I mentioned that to her, she told me not to apply, because she didn't think I would get the job.  She told me that after all this time nobody would want me, and that it would be embarrassing for her if I tried.  She would prefer me to apply to another company, rather than the one she already worked for.

If she had said this in reality, it would have been really hurtful, and also nothing like this friend, who is very loving and supportive.  So it is me saying it to myself really.  Which is true enough

DREAM 1
IDEAS...the routine established way of healing and its lackings might be
where some of the frustrations find their roots...
such as ... in a kafka novel where the bureaucacy ends up
at so many dead ends and preoccupies one so much that one misses
opening the real door of opportunity...

DREAM 2
KIND OF DITTO TO DREAM 1

DREAM 3
2 POSSIBLE IDEAS..
the old friend as a true guide
that staying inside the same company is remaining in the same kafkaesque bureaucacy
and being rescued is kind of like thinking that changing the tables and chairs in
the dining room of the sinking titanic is gonna save the ship...
well if one does it with the right faith it actually could maybe....
as god works in mysterious ways
..the other possible idea.. your interpretation is right

[Sela]

Hi October:

This is late, since your dreams were back in July but I just thought I'd comment that it sounds to me like you were just feeling so deflated/frustrated/etc with the system and it's ability to help you and that that caused a great fear that the system might even try to harm you (by taking you into some permanent ward where you didn't want to be)....probably as you said due to the trouble with your T and all.  Still.....it's a good thing that these fears/whatnot came out in a dream making more space for possibly more comfortable feelings and in a way...to demonstrate the absurdity of the fear (not that it is absurd to feel that fear but just that the likelihood of such a thing happening, the way it happened in the dream, is absurd and kind of comical......toilet rolls and all --heehee) and hopefully diffuse it a little.   How is it going now?  Have you been able to get support anywhere?  Have you become your own therapist? (no kidding.....sometimes it's all one can do eh?).  Hope you are feeling better.   (((((((October))))))))

As for me....I had a real dilly dream last night.  I dreamt that my aunt came to visit and my exhusband was just falling all over being kind and generous and thoughtful and polite and over extending himself to and for her.  He was extremely giving and caring and just the ultimate host of all hosts and when my aunt went to leave, she said she had had a fabulous time and was so grateful to my ex for his "hospitality" etc.  After she was gone, I walked over to my ex, kissed him on the cheek and thanked him too and told him he could go home now and be his real self.  Woke up totally stunned!!!

This is an aunt who behaves very N very often and who I keep contact with very sparsely.  In the past, when I was married to my ex, he treated this particular aunt with disdain and cruelty, which, even though she's not my favorite aunt, I felt was truly awful and horrible of him.  He is the least likely hospitable host alive and that kiss on the cheek and the feeling that he was here, in my home, performing some art for my aunt, left my lips all dried up and my throat feeling choaky when I awoke.  OOOOOOooooooo!  Yuk!!!

How weird is that?  And speaking of absurd.........

  Sela

[October]

Hi October:

 How is it going now?  Have you been able to get support anywhere?  Have you become your own therapist? (no kidding.....sometimes it's all one can do eh?).  Hope you are feeling better.   (((((((October))))))))

  Sela

How it is going is that I rang the hospital a week ago, to make an appointment with my psychiatrist, to find I had been discharged.  I told the receptionist in no uncertain terms that I am not discharged, and that they have made a mistake, and told her to investigate.  She rang me back half an hour later to say she had cancelled the discharge, and gave me an appointment - for October!!!!!  Nice to know I am a priority.   

The referral to group therapy has not happened - I have not seen any paperwork whatever about that, so it looks like Diane forgot.  I am not strong enough to chase this up at present, so will wait until October.  Maybe I will have recovered a little by then.

Meanwhile, C and I are doing ok.  We are going to my brother's wedding, which is rather scarey, but I have handled a lot in getting us this far, and we leave on Sunday.  It has been very difficult.  But I don't want her to learn how to run away from life forever, so I decided some weeks back to be as positive as I could be, and see what could be done, bit by bit.  (I also conquered my fear of doctors enough to go and ask for help for the flights, and got that without any problems (mild tranquillisers).  The GP was rather amazed at my bravery, I think.  I might have to revise my negative views of doctors after meeting him.  Very nice doctor.)

I thought your dream about your aunt was interesting.  Will we ever give up hoping for these people to change and become the people we deserve them to be?     I like the way that your ex managed to fool her, but didn't fool you for a minute.   

[Sela]

Hi again October:

Well...it sounds like October might be the month of starting new stuff for you.  Not a bad month eh?  I have always wondered about your name...come to think of it.  If you feel like it....please tell how you decided upon it (so much comes to mind....fall colours, Thanksgiving - in Canada, Halloween, crisp mornings, geese heading south, etc-- lovely month really eh?).

I will pray that you have a lovely time at the wedding and all goes well.  Enjoy!  Your daughter is lucky to have a mum who is so considerate of her.  Very glad to hear you found a very nice doc!  Right now, I haven't got one at all (mine retired) and there aren't enough family docs to go around here.  I just keep hoping nothing serious goes wrong until one becomes available, hopefully soon and hopefully...a nice one like you found too.

I like the way that your ex managed to fool her, but didn't fool you for a minute.

Thanks for pointing that out.  I didn't think of it at all.  I think I have been very frustrated with my ex lately for all the promises he keeps making and breaking to my kids.  Nothing new, for him, but it's hard to watch and then try to console their disappointment.  I guess my frustrations come out pretty clearly in my dreams.  This is fairly new and a good thing for me, I think.  It feels kinda like purging or something.  Even when I do wake up almost gagging and in shock!

Have fun at that wedding!!  I hope you and your daughter enjoy yourselves October!

  Sela

[Sallying Forth]

This is probably one of the longest (seeming) dreams I've had in a long time. It felt like it went on and on but it might have been short.

I was looking for this encampment in a wilderness area. The directions were very complicated and when I got to a place near the encampment I kept trying to remember an important bit of information. When I finally did remember it, I heard it repeated over and over again in my head and saw a picture of a rushing river flowing over a road. Don't cross the river when the water is high, your car will be swept away. I have no idea what this means. I remember waiting until the river wasn't over the road before crossing it.

Although the symbol for my soul is a rushing river so I thought maybe it has to do with something spiritual? Not sure.

Any ideas?

Thanks!