Dreams anyone?

[October]

I was looking for this encampment in a wilderness area. The directions were very complicated and when I got to a place near the encampment I kept trying to remember an important bit of information. When I finally did remember it, I heard it repeated over and over again in my head and saw a picture of a rushing river flowing over a road. Don't cross the river when the water is high, your car will be swept away. I have no idea what this means. I remember waiting until the river wasn't over the road before crossing it.

Although the symbol for my soul is a rushing river so I thought maybe it has to do with something spiritual? Not sure.

Any ideas?

Thanks!

I can see two possible answers here.  A simple one, and a slightly deeper one.  The simple one is that you are a careful person, who remembers useful advice and follows it.  Ns would disregard this kind of information, and think, I can drive perfectly well, a bit of water isn't going to harm me.  And they might well drown.  You didn't.  You thought, I need to remember something, then you remembered it, and you followed it.  Well done you.

The slightly deeper answer is that a river crossing a road is called a ford.  Sometimes the mind plays clever word games, and this one might say, don't buy a car that you can't afford, or it might get repossessed.  Either buy a less expensive one, or else wait until you can afford it, and then enjoy driving it.     Which it seems is what you have done. 

Take your pick.   

I like the idea of the wilderness, though.  That speaks to me of exploring yourself, and finding out unexpected and wonderful things.  I hope you enjoy doing that!!!!

[October]

[quote author=Sela link=topic=1363.msg28384#msg28384 date=1124936927

Well...it sounds like October might be the month of starting new stuff for you.  Not a bad month eh?  I have always wondered about your name...come to think of it.  If you feel like it....please tell how you decided upon it (so much comes to mind....fall colours, Thanksgiving - in Canada, Halloween, crisp mornings, geese heading south, etc-- lovely month really eh?).

Have fun at that wedding!!  I hope you and your daughter enjoy yourselves October!

  Sela

I've been a bit scared to post too much here the past week or so, because this wedding is a huge risk.  However, it has worked out that C and I get to stay in a separate flat from my parents and brother, and we have separate flights too.  So with any luck we will have a good enough time.

We have sorted jabs, and insurance, and mosquito spray, and flights and everything.  We have everything packed and lifts to the airport sorted out.  I am still v v frightened of the whole thing, but even managed to get some tranquillisers from my GP to help with the flights, so that I can stay calm for C.  Today we marked the route on a world map, and I have told C that we are going to treat the journey as the best part of the holiday, because for me travelling is the best thing in the world to do.  (That is part of the person I used to be trying to get out once more!!)  And now she says that when she grows up she is going to travel all over the world, and I am so pleased to hear her say that, because it is what I want for her; to feel that the world belongs to her just as much as to anyone else, and to grasp life with both hands, rather than becoming like me, afraid to leave my own home.

My name is very boring really.  I was born in October, and it was the best name I could think of.     But it is a beautiful season of the year, with the leaves turning and everything.  Actually, they are turning now in my garden - the seasons are arriving earlier 'they' say.  I told C we will leave in summer, and return a fortnight later and probably feel very autumnal.

Just one thing about your ex; if he breaks a promise to your children, I am not sure what you do, but I would not hide it from them.  Let them be honest and feel hurt if he hurts them.  I am sure you are v sensible already, but I find a lot of people around C try to tell her how to feel, and not to hate/dislike/be disappointed with her dad, when in fact her feelings are perfectly normal and understandable.  I thought I would mention it, that is all.  Sorry your ex is being so mean, though.

[Sela]

Hiya October:

I'm very proud of you for going ahead and making plans and committing to facing your fears in order to go to the wedding and show your daughter some really good stuff and for he benefit too.  That is a wonderful accomplishment (number of them) already so good for you for doing all of that!  I bet it was not easy even phoning for the reservations and stuff but you have dealt with your fear and gone ahead anyhow, which is fantastic!!

I bet you will both enjoy the travelling, just as you hope to, and have a great time at the weddding also!  You are being the person you used to be and getting out once more!!  Who knows?  Maybe this will give you more confidence to go out more often or again soon!

There was a book I read, can't remember the author's name at the moment but the title was:

"I'd rather laugh".

I remember she described how her entire life went haywire (divorce after 25? years, illness?) and then her son, in his early twenties, suddenly died (by accident).  She was totally devistated and eventually developed the same phobia about going out and became a recluse (I think for 11 years).  She described how she overcame the fear and triumphed over her phobia.  Wish I could remember the author.  Maybe you've already read it?

Anyhow, glad you are going and I will pray that all goes well and that you and C will have the time of your lives!!  What a wonderful adventure!!!  Have a sip of something at the wedding for me!  I love weddings!!

As to your name.....what a great idea!  I think it's marvelous, honestly, because it's a fact about you (and a lovely month to boot!). 

Re my ex......well.....thanks for the suggestions.  He makes promises to them and then breaks them and they tell me about it and express their disappointment.  I neither support nor bad mouth their father but rather just listen and try to acknowledge their thoughts and feelings (which are exactly as you say...normal and understandable and I pretty much tell them that).  They usually seem to feel better afterward and go on about some other subject or sometimes just say:  "Thanks Mom".

But afterward....when they are gone....and I think about his behaviour and his total lack of consideration for them.....I want to throttle him.  I feel extreme anger and resentment.  I feel frustrated because I know this will happen again and again.  I feel like giving him the duct tape treatment, a lot of the time too!  So.....I have to find a way to release all that and I do but obviously, the residual is seeping into my beauty sleep time ( haha).

Oh well......I'll live.  I just wish for once he would smarten up and do what he says.  He's not a bad person but he's irresponsible and selfish.  He means well probably when he makes all these promises but it's all talk and no action.  Sometimes I think he just doesn't think at all before he opens his trap (which I suppose most of us have done at one time or another?).

  Sela

[bliz]

Had a weird dream this morning. I had started drinking again and was sent to a rehab hospital.  Next thing I know I am on some island paradise place and the ex is there.  He thinks we can get back together but I am avoiding him.  I think I am starting to waver on this when some gf's arrive and try to get me to marry an old 7th grade crush.  Fast forward I am back in the rehab hospital and my mother is there and other friends.  It was weird.  NO idea what it means.

[October]

Had a weird dream this morning. I had started drinking again and was sent to a rehab hospital.  Next thing I know I am on some island paradise place and the ex is there.  He thinks we can get back together but I am avoiding him.  I think I am starting to waver on this when some gf's arrive and try to get me to marry an old 7th grade crush.  Fast forward I am back in the rehab hospital and my mother is there and other friends.  It was weird.  NO idea what it means.

I read once that dreams are indicative of both fears and wishes - one or the other.  Yours appears to be a mixture of what you fear and what you would wish for, all tangled up.

At a guess, it might be telling you that you are confused, and to concentrate on deciding what you actually want, and then on getting it.  I wish I could do that myself!!!!!!   

Hope that helps.

xxxxxxx

[spyralle]

I had a dream after my partner died that I will never forget so I would like to share it.  It was very vivid and in bright colours.  we were in a house that was similar to mine but a lot more homely and comfortable.  we were so excited to see each other.  he kept saying that though we had decided before we came for this to happen (him dying) he couldn't bear it and missed me so much.  There was a security man standing on the door waiting for him and I knew that he had not got long...

He took me into the front room of the house and it was even homlier and there was a beautiful fire burning in the hearth.  He said that there was a puzzle that I had to figure out and he showed me all these really complicated pieces of red pulsating stuff on the table in really complex shapes.  he said that I must ask my daughter for help as she had all the answers.  He showed me my daughter sitting in a corner of the room and she had completed the puzzle.  It was like a bright, red pulsating pyramid.  i woke up feeling calm, at peace and energised all at the same time.

The next day I took my daughter out shopping and we were walking around the town and I told her about the dream.  I just said to her that he had said that she had the answers to the puzzle and she said.  I know it's a red triangle.  She did not know why she said it but it was really strange.  It was like it really happened.  It kind of had an electric quality to the dream.  I know I sound a bit mad now but I've had a couple since.  They are always very vivid and I always wake up feeling the same...

Spyralle

[bliz]

SPyralle,
This kind of dream is a gift.  I have had some like this.  It is wonderful that your daughter actually had the answer and scary too I am sure.  Cherish this dream.  It was sent to you for a purpose I believe and I am not some kind of wacked out new ager.  (Please all you believers of New Age philosophy, do not send me hate mail.)

[bliz]

The night I had the hurricane dream, Hurricane Katrina actually took a weird, unforecasted turn and hit  where my house is in Florida.  I had no idea until last night. Little damage.  Maybe the dream was prophetic.

[miss piggy]

Hi everyone

Sela: the book you mention is by Linda Richman, Mike Myer's mother in law.  I'd read it a long time ago and it was interesting to read her story.

Bliz: I wonder if the island paradise is some sort of fantasy place of how life is beautiful with the ex but also isolating. ?

Spyralle: wow, fantastic story about your dream and the red triangle and your daughter.  Gives me goose bumps. 

I really enjoy dream exploration and do think there is a lot more going on than our consciousness can perceive.  I also dabble in astrology, not to predict the future but to use as a personality psychology tool.  I grew up in a very conservative household but have always been fascinated with the mysterious. 

If one only knows their "sun sign" and reads the horoscope in the newspaper, I can understand why that person would be skeptical.  I was too.  I do not act at all like my sun sign and finally my curiosity got the better of me, and I decided to get more information about my birth chart.  It was amazingly accurate.  (I act like my rising sign, scorpio.  Your rising sign is your "public face")  I'm very private and reserved (scorpio like) but when you get to know me I'm full of surprises.

I'll leave it at that before you all think I go around wearing a pyramid hat on my head!    

I had a dream last night where I was in a huge mansion owned by OJ Simpson.  i was an employee assistant type and setting up tennis games for people.  OJ is headed out to play tennis with a gun in his pocket.  I go into a room down the hallway and there are very small animals that fly down the road into the woods.  I want to find them before they get hurt.  I go to look for them and find most of them in a small cottage.  One is a grayish white dove that is sleeping on my shoulder.  I am wondering how to hold it, face up or face down.  The other animals were about the size of my thumbnail and I was trying to put them in little cups or whatever to give them something to perch on.  I am also trying to remember all their names.  Meanwhile this huge leggy spider crawls up my leg and gives birth to several tiny spiders.  This is creepy but not scary and I brush it off of me.  I wonder about the little spiders because they resemble the little animals i am trying to rescue. 

Any thoughts?
MP

[voxanne]

A guess:
Parents=facets of your personality that want to dominate you as if you were a child
Landscaping=your superficial aspects
Is there a part of you that convinces you to make superficial changes, and then burdens you with a price to pay that is simply too much? Do you feel compelled to give that part of your personality authority over you?
Suggest:
Realize the superficiality of that aspect of yourself. Give greater credence to your adult heart and mind. You are no longer a child.
)

[Sela]

Hello all:

Thanks Miss Piggy!  Yep!  That's the book.  I really enjoyed reading her story.

Bliz:  I bet that dream was prophetic.  I've had some like that.  I don't like them.  I don't seem to understand them at the time and then I feel like an idiot afterwards.  Or blessed???  Or both.

Voxanne:  That's very interesting.  You have a neat way of interpreting dreams.   Makes me old cells vibrate some (heehee  ).

On Saturday night I had a dream that shook me up.  I dreamt that my abusers controlled everything.  I mean everything in the whole world, everything in my world, from food right down to how fast/slow the clock moved to how much oxygen I was allowed to breathe.  They had complete power over everthing I was allowed or not allowed or forced to experience.  And they did their very best to control my feelings, which to a certain extent, they succeeded at, by way of torture.  I felt quite helpless and beaten, frustrated, angry, full of despair and fear.  Trapped.  Unable to see a way to escape.  I woke up in a great stinky sweat (pew..... ) and I felt drained, rather than rested.  I didn't like this dream at all.

Sela

[amethyst]

I had a dream after my partner died that I will never forget so I would like to share it.  It was very vivid and in bright colours.  we were in a house that was similar to mine but a lot more homely and comfortable.  we were so excited to see each other.  he kept saying that though we had decided before we came for this to happen (him dying) he couldn't bear it and missed me so much.  There was a security man standing on the door waiting for him and I knew that he had not got long...

He took me into the front room of the house and it was even homlier and there was a beautiful fire burning in the hearth.  He said that there was a puzzle that I had to figure out and he showed me all these really complicated pieces of red pulsating stuff on the table in really complex shapes.  he said that I must ask my daughter for help as she had all the answers.  He showed me my daughter sitting in a corner of the room and she had completed the puzzle.  It was like a bright, red pulsating pyramid.  i woke up feeling calm, at peace and energised all at the same time.

The next day I took my daughter out shopping and we were walking around the town and I told her about the dream.  I just said to her that he had said that she had the answers to the puzzle and she said.  I know it's a red triangle.  She did not know why she said it but it was really strange.  It was like it really happened.  It kind of had an electric quality to the dream.  I know I sound a bit mad now but I've had a couple since.  They are always very vivid and I always wake up feeling the same...

Spyralle

(((Spyralle))) That is a very healing dream. I don't think you are mad or loony. I wonder what the red pyramind represents...may be something to do with the abuser, victim, rescuer triangle???? I also believe that there we can receive messages from the other side iin our dreams. Now maybe I sound loony, but as Shakespeare wrote. "There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy."

My husband's father was very abusive to his whole family and very controlling. He was a doctor, and he died of a massive stroke when my husband was 16. He dropped dead in the middle of a rage at his wife and daughter. I always felt that it was tragic that the last words he said to his family were words of anger...and I always felt that he "went on" to regret that. 

I had an incredibly vivid dream of my husband's father on the first night I spent in my husband's childhood home. I dreamt that his father was younger and he was standing in a dark hallway, facing the light, which was behind me and on me. His dad was wearing a white business shirt, dark grey pants, a burgundy Perry Como-ish  cardigan, and dark loafers or slippers. He was sad. There was no anger at all in his demeanor, but there was confusion. He and I stood for a long time and simply regarded eachother. There was a strong feeling that he had come to tell me something and that he was glad that I was becoming part of the family. I was very aware during the dream that my husband's father was dead and that I was looking at a spirit, but that he was real. I could feel the hair on my arms and the back of my neck stand up, but I was not afraid...I knew that this was a haunting, but not a bad thing, just very eerie. He told me that he was here to tell me that he loved his family and had been "only trying to help" because he knew that all his kids and his wife had problems (true-all have severe ADHD and learning disabilities), that his rage and anger was because he was afraid for their well-being and their futures. He told me he had been trying to contol them and had raged out of sheer frustration because he couldn't understand why they and their homelife was so chaotic, which was also true. I said to him,"And what good did it do? You hurt everyone. You damaged your children. You hurt your wife." He said,"I didn't mean to. I was only trying to help them." I somehow conveyed to him that I would let them know, but that he would be in the dark and confused until he understood that rage and control, no matter how well-intended, don't help anything. He disappeared and I woke up.

I told my husband and his sister the dream and how vivid it was. Now, I had only seem two photos of their father, one in his medical whites upon graduation from med school and once as a much older man. I told them  what their dad wore and my s-i-l revealed that his dad had diabetes and his feet and lower legs were so swollen that he had to wear slip- on shoes. Hubby told me hiis father always wore a white shirt, dark pants and when he wasn't in his whites or a business suit, he would put on a cardigan at home. One of his sweaters was burgundy, a V neck, which is what I had seen. I told them that their father looked much younger, but not as young as the medical school picture...that his face seemed to be rounder. I felt that I was seeing their father in his prime, maybe about age 30 or 35. My husband got some more pictures out and sure enough, his dad's face had become rounder. My husband is dark, and I told him that his father was even more olive complected than my husband, which turned out to be true. I said,"Your father was a very handsome man. You resemble him, but you look more like your grandfather than your dad." I gave them their father's message and told them that I don't think their father has understood everything yet, so he is still somewhat lost in the dark.     

[miss piggy]

Hi Amethyst,

This is so cool!  How did you not feel afraid???    How did you feel when you saw your FIL in the photo with the sweater? 

OK, don't call me a crack pot, but I really do believe in the afterlife, in communication with spirits etc (with verification).  I loved John Edward's crossing over show.  But if I encountered a spirit myself, I think I would freak!!!  Someone pointed out to me that it isn't just a handy turn of phrase when the angels speak in the Bible and the first thing they say is "be not afraid".  I wouldn't give them the chance to say anything. 

It sounds like your H and SIL believed you saw him.  How did they respond to his message?

Breathless, MP

[amethyst]

(((Miss Piggy)))If this had happened in a waking state, I would probably have jumped through the window. Part of me realized that it was a dream, even though it felt very real.

Both H and SIL are convinced I met their father and that he is in the process of seeking forgiveness. I don't know if either of them understood that he appeared because of his love for his family, but they both seemed to get some healing from that dream. We all feel that when he reaches the state where he is no longer trying to explain his intentions or justify what made him behave the way he did, that he will go into the light.

I later found out that one of his favorite sayings was "the road to Hell is paved with good intentions." None of us believe in Hell, but we now believe that souls can be lost, wandering in confusion and unfinished business for a long time after death.

[miss piggy]

Hello again A.  Hugs back atcha!

This is just so interesting to me on a lot of different levels.  First, there's the whole otherworldly experience of it...

Then, there's the meaning or possible implications of your FIL's current state of affairs, for lack of a better way of saying it.  One thing I have noticed about diehard (no pun intended!) Ns is that it is difficult for them to learn to relate through insight.  they are not coachable or teachable in this regard.  Think of a "hotshot" basketball star who thinks his way is the best way because his run-and-gun game worked when he was 10 years old.  Now in high school or college, it is hard for him to accept input from a coach because he is a self-proclaimed star and it is hard to learn a new way.  Or another analogy might be Ground Hog's Day (the movie) where Bill Murray really didn't get it until he lived the same day over and over and over, wanting to die in the process, until he finally learns how to love.

I wonder if your FIL is stuck between this world and the next, still giving excuses for how he behaved and resisting insight, instead of realizing his error and asking forgiveness.  Instead of learning the lesson.  I guess he has a ways to go if he died in the middle of a rage.    It seems like a moral tale suitable for Edgar Allan Poe or Charles Dickens. 

Maybe he'll see you again and you can check on his progress?  Can Ns heal in the afterlife?  There's something to ponder...thank you for sharing this.  MP