Author Topic: Does someone know of a good sexual abuse support site?  (Read 53493 times)

Denise

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Does someone know of a good sexual abuse support site?
« Reply #300 on: June 16, 2005, 08:50:38 AM »
I found out the other day,the crown prosecution has decided not to prosecute my sex abuser, on the grounds of, cos it was so many years ago, he would not be able to give an alibi for himself, plus my medical records before the age of 16 have vanished, so basically it wouldnt be a fair trial, i am absolutely sick and gutted, he has got away with it, although it clearly states on my file i was sexually abused it doesnt name him as the abuser, if people had took notice of what i said when i was young and questioned all my sexual activities that were wrote about when i was 5, we wouldnt be here now, and he would have been punished, its a disgrace on the part of the law and social services cos they let me down big time.
The fact i said he use 2 climb through the window, and i remember clearly and he has admitted it but saying he only done it once, and yet he went on to say betty(mother) use to leave us alone days at a time, how would he know unless he was there regularly, so what he says is the same as some of the facts written in my statement, and yet walks away probably smiling, the justice system is totally messed up, it should have gone 2 court and let a jury hear both sides of the story, and let them decide.
I was a little girl sexually abused on many occasions in many dirty disgusting ways, AND HES GOT AWAY WITH IT!!! :cry:  :cry:  :cry:  :cry:
Denise

Brigid

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Does someone know of a good sexual abuse support site?
« Reply #301 on: June 16, 2005, 09:42:30 AM »
Denise,

I'm very sorry that the justice system is not doing its job.  It will be little of consolation, but I believe that they would not have prosecuted him here in the States either, because the statute of limitations (the amount of time where charges can be brought) would have run out.  Murder is one of the few (or maybe the only) thing which does not have a time limit.

Would his being put in jail miraculously have made you healthy?  Probably not.  You would have gotten some satisfaction knowing that he had gotten his life diminished, but it would not have fixed you.  Hopefully you know that he will face judgment and pay the price of his evil ways eventually, but probably not in this lifetime.

Now you need to put this behind you and find the way to truly fix Denise and make her whole.  I know that I am saying this as a person who has not endured the pain and suffering that you have, but I really don't see any other options for you.  You know you can't continue to live the way you have been and ever hope to find peace and happiness.  I want that so much for you, Denise, as I'm sure many others here do, your children do and your friends and other family as well.  

I pray that you can start to work on you and find a way to take those tiny, little steps day-by-day to lead yourself out of the dark and into the light.  Only you can do that.  Friends and family can support you, but you are the one who must do the work.  I wish you much hope and faith.

((((((((Denise)))))))))))

God bless,

Brigid

Mati

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Does someone know of a good sexual abuse support site?
« Reply #302 on: June 16, 2005, 10:27:32 AM »
Hi Denise

My abuser got away with it too because he died  :cry:  I wish that I had spoken out sooner. Too late now. But I do believe that justice is done despite the legal system as I believe that the higher power/God will not allow crimes against children to go unpunished. My abuser got Alzheimers so maybe that was punishment. It is so unfair if they get away with it but it is true that it does not affect our recovery and personal growth. They never did develop into whole healthy people else they would have come to us to express their sorrow and say sorry. They will die as sad sick people but we can make the decision to be whole and have all of the things in life that have been denied to us. Why let them win is what I say. I hope that you can see there is hope for you too Denise.

Anonymous

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Does someone know of a good sexual abuse support site?
« Reply #303 on: June 17, 2005, 11:10:19 AM »
Dear Denise:

I'm sorry that your abuser got away with abusing you.  My abusers did/are still too.  It sucks.  I know it's not the same type of abuse but pain is pain, isn't it?  It's maddening too, isn't it, that people get away with behaving the way they do, sometimes eh?

I'm with Mati in that I don't think they will get away with it forever.  Maybe in this life.  Maybe.

Anyway......it's a loss because you said you were hoping he would have to face justice and so I'm sure that hurts and adds to your sadness and feelings of being abused......now by the "system".

I hope you will get those feelings out and grieve the loss.  You don't need any more pain to keep/carry inside.

October and Mum gave you some profound advice, I think, and others have echoed their suggestion that:

Denise needs to care about Denise and that Denise matters.

I hope you are doing little things for you, that help you feel a little better, inbetween feeling all the rest of the junk.  I hope you are hugging Denise and caring for Denise and believing that Denise does matter!

((((((((Denise))))))))

GFN

Denise

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Re: Does someone know of a good sexual abuse support site?
« Reply #304 on: July 16, 2005, 12:06:28 PM »
Hi, everyone, sorry ive not been posting, i needed to get my head around what has gone on, for now i have completely stopped with the antidepressants, and i actually feel better for it, things arent perfect, but they are getting there slowly, i want to thank u all 4 your support, it helped hugely :).
I hope everyone is doing ok, i will have to read and catch up, hugs 4 you all
Denise

longtire

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Re: Does someone know of a good sexual abuse support site?
« Reply #305 on: July 16, 2005, 03:38:26 PM »
Denise, I am very glad that you are feeling somewhat better and that you are back posting! :)  Keep taking care of yourself.
longtire

- The only thing that was ever really wrong with me was that I used to think there was something wrong with *me*.  :)