Hiya. Went. Survived. Came home.
There was this other woman serving teas with me. Strange woman, bit serious. You know the kind? Worried about getting the right money.
So, it was either her at the tea bar, or else yours truly, giving cakes away to all the kiddies, because what is life about if not being allowed a free cake at a May Fair when you only have a few pennies in your hand??
I dare say I cost them maybe a fiver by that, in total, but since I took more cakes than that, I think it is quits really.
One stupid man
complained about there being gluten free cakes, and said in his day they didn't have gluten free, and what did people do then? So I replied 'They died'. Didn't shut him up, though. Stupid man, with my daughter listening to him complain about fat free this and sugar free that.
On the whole it was ok. I couldn't go round the stalls much, because it felt too vulnerable and visible, but I did a bit, with C, for her sake. Not sure it teaches her how to be normal, though.
Then we went back to the Rectory, and had Chinese, and then I helped with the service sheets for today, until about 9.30, when we left to come home as Rector was starting to prepare the Sunday School stuff. Would have stayed longer, but he was concerned that I would be too tired. He does care, really.
However, he was much more tired than I was, I think. We were trying to look after one another, which is a nice thing to realise.
Got a letter from the LEA yesterday with a pack of lies, which the home tutor is going to sort out for me, because she says she is not happy with it.
Meanwhile, got another letter from t, about not being available over the bank holiday, and about what happened with X. She says she can't let me have more access to her (ie phone number/whatever for emergencies) because that would set up unreasonable expectations of her. She says to ring either the psychiatric unit where I have a psychiatrist (and where there is not a duty nurse available, or anyone else, as far as I know), or the Samaritans. Nice of her to write, but not sure how I feel about this kind of rationalisation.
I need something. I say so. It is not available because it is not available. Therefore it is my fault for expecting too much. Try the Samaritans.
Sounds weird to me. Sounds not therapeutic.
Need to think about this. I think she does not understand trauma enough.
