Hi Seasons,
Your sister is one of those people who is unequipped to listen to anyone she has a permanent relationship with. she has to work a little harder at pretending to listen to her "friends". This means giving someone else their "turn" to talk while she smiles and nods and waits for her "turn". With family members she doesn't
have to do this (to their way of thinking). This is why it is confusing for family members because we think "gee, she can shut up when she's with her friends, why not with me? See, she has the ability..." No, she doesn't. She won't change. This is the
change in ourselves--realizing they don't change.
My brother used to get me on the phone and then do stuff on his desk, interrupt himself, etc. It was infuriating. I don't know why he felt he had to do this except to make himself feel important. As I think back on it now, I think he was using me on the other end of the line to pose for people at work. Weird.
I agree with your choice simply to hang up vs. telling her off. It's just easier and she's not going to listen anyway. I suspect you and I are the kind who think they
have to keep trying with family members who blow us off. We don't have to. If we choose to, then we need to recognize that choice. I kept very minimal contact with my brother during his fully *insecure N it's all about him* stage. He's still N in a major way but I'm also acting more adult around him these days. He also has a lot of respect for my H, which helps.
I think you would have been mad at yourself if you told her off, for letting her get to you, for feeling like you lost control. If you continue contact, you will have another opportunity (nice thing about Ns--they're so predictable!) to handle things the way you like. I have a few times, with difficult people who persist in twisting reality, told the person on the other end of the phone, "I'm not having this conversation and I'm going to hang up now." Then I hang up. Just like I would with a telephone salesperson selling me something I don't want. Sell it somewhere else. I'm not buying. Period.
Try it, you'll like it!

MP