Hello Mum,
Yes, your SIL is weird. I think your wedding reception was supposed to be a demonstration of her largesse at your expense. And then her friends "abandoned" her. All because your husband had the nerve to marry you. Quite immature, but there you are.
I would not accept any invitations from her that didn't include my H. I would communicate this to my BROTHER. Preferably in earshot of SIL so she knows you are not "going around her back" but you are not directly confronting her. (I know, it's a lot of work dealing with these people).
BTW, your brother might be completely in the dark about your Hs exclusion. This is the old two-for-one move. Exclude new member of the family, don't tell anyone what you did, everyone else assumes hubby was invited, you act miffed and you are the problem. Lots of craziness and SIL gets to be the victim. Wonderful. Ns are geniuses at creating problems where others have to do something or if they don't, they don't care. And if they do something, they are interfering. ugh.
I would also give SIL an opportunity to vent. I would. The way to win with these weirdos is to tell them how great THEY are and what a loser you are for being so cheap. Apologize for embarrassing them in front of their friends. Basically listen to their irrational opinions and stupidity, acknowledge their version of reality and say, sincerely, I am so sorry you feel that way [and are so incredibly screwed up]. Then everything is hunky dory. Of course, this is basically capitulating to her weirdness but might be worth it if you want to continue to see your brother. Just an option.
I'm so sorry your wedding day memories are tainted by her illness. These are just brainstorms and hopefully help a little. Hugs, MP
