Brilliant Portia!
I second Nicky's thank you!
Here is one I just made up last weekend...believe it or not my husband started it with some comment about naming a car narcissia:
Having had experience in marketing I quickly knew just how the commercial would go:
With a Musac version of "You are so beautiful to me" playing in the background - the word "me" replaced with "us"...."you're evertything we've hoped for, you're everything we need...." etc.
Italics indicates sexy inflection...
"
You've always known
you are the best, isn't it time everyone else did too?"
Features second only to
you in exquisite exceptionality:
- A one seater.
- Second seat optional [/list:u] NOTE: (due to its standard ejection feature no air bags are available for the 2nd seat - this limitation however made available extra bags for the driver seat. The primary air bag is proactively hense perpetually deployed directly in the line of vision - with all the mirrors there is just too much of
you to enjoy to distract
you with the unsightly obsticals in
your path - and isn't that the primary function of the mirrors anyway.)
- There is no liability insurance available for the Narcissia as
you always have the right of way.
- Absolutely NO room for baggage.
(this is of course only to protect you from passengers since we know
you don't have any baggage.)
- Reflective interior.
- Ability to directly siphon fuel from those cute smiling unsuspecting little VW bugs while traveling at highway speeds and to do so completely undetected. You'll never have to stop for gas again!
- Turn signals work entirely at random so as to keep other drivers guessing.
- a Musac version of "You are so beautiful to me" the word "me" replaced with "us"...."you're evertything we've hoped for, you're everything we need...." etc. plays each time the windows or doors open or the car experiences impact. Perpetual repeat play feature available also.
- Instead of the ordinary horn the Narcissia's yells with delicate charm and charisma "Get the *$#!@ outta my way!" and as back up daggers and spikes discharge from all sides of your vehicle at the slightest percieved provocation.
- GPS takes on a whole new meaning for
you - all Narcissia come with a Grandiose Persona Simulator just in case of break downs. [/list:u]
Any other ideas? And what about an Echo car...saw one just the other day shirking and lurking along the gutter looking with begruding and conflicted affection at the Narcissia. Oh, dear perhaps that was the Love Bug?
