Voicelessness and Emotional Survival > Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board
How to heal NPD
seeker:
Dear Anonymous/Guest,
Just wanted to respond to your last note esp. because I sense you are now way out of your comfort zone :shock: . Good idea to check with a professional association on where things stand. It will put your mind at ease either way. I also understand the resentment of losing a valued relationship. That would be natural fall-out. But there, in a nutshell, lies the conflict of interest: Which comes first, a friend or a patient?
Also want to put your mind at ease by suggesting that perhaps this friend is unaware of the lines he may be crossing. It's weird. There are many professions that have codes but the individuals that those codes apply to don't always seem very educated in them! So it may not be anything Machiavellian on his part to say he has no problem. He may be a very thoughtful and disciplined professional. Ethics codes exist to protect the public from professionals who do not respect the boundaries, who need it to be spelled out for them. That said though, the code applies to all, nice or naughty. It may be insulting to the nice ones but the code is there to protect everyone, including the professional. Bottom line is there is a need for professional distance.
Good luck to you Guest. We'll all be curious to learn what you find out.
Seeker
Anonymous:
my therapist refused to counsel my husband and I either separately or together, she said it's important for the therapist of each to empathize with that person and get to know that person's perspective and what things mean to them.
Where narcissism is involved its even more important, because the nvictim is so hurt and angry and desperate for someone to see their suffering, and the n so damaged and manipulative.
Lundy Bancroft interviews and talks to the wives of men he is working with on anger issues as an integral part of the work, but that's not the same as being friends with them.
Thinking about it, Iwould be hurt if my therapist made friends with my partner, and wonder 'whose side is she on' type things.
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