People, to the N, are just objects

[reallyME]

Bosses who mistreat employees, people who swindle the elderly out of their pensions, both have something in common with each other...they see people as OBJECTS and not as real people.  They see people as objects worthy of only being used to further their own success/wealth, etc.

Soldiers are taught to see the "enemy" as an object, so they can kill them without being halted by tender feelings for them as people.  These soldiers are able to find compassion and care by being with other men in the army, so they do not totally just become nothing more than "killing machines" the rest of their lives.

When a person is seen by the N as an IMAGE, they are able to also view them as the very part of themselves that they HATE and that they want to destroy!  This is called PROJECTION.

The con-man must see those he "cons" as gullible and stupid.
The N often wants to be seen as strong and tough; therefore, he will view others as vulnerable and weak, justifying his wanting to DESTROY them.

Some Narcissists, like psychopaths, have suppressed their inner self and feelings for so long, that they no longer can identify with a true conscience.  This disables them to distinguish truth from falsehood.

[seasons]

Some Narcissists, like psychopaths, have suppressed their inner self and feelings for so long, that they no longer can identify with a true conscience.  This disables them to distinguish truth from falsehood

.

I have seen this one. It makes me what to scream why this condition can not be treated?

[axa]

XN was quite aware, I pointed it out regularily, that he projected so much onto me.  He saw me as an authority figure, admitted this and he hates authority figures.  I was in his twisted mind his abusive mother.  And I received his wrath.  He had an incredible inability to see people as individuals.  He generalised all the time.  He had great difficulty seperating me from himself and knew this.

He needed someone to hate and rage against all the time.  If it was not me it was someone else.  I know his X that he has gone back to is the next victim.  She lived with him for years and he nearly destroyed her but she is back for more. 

All the time they need someone to project their rage and hatred onto.  Those of us here who have left the Ns are the lucky ones.  Trust me someone else is getting the abuse, it just does not go away. 

I do not believe they can recover.  To recover one must admit one has a problem and one must be willing to suffer the pain of working through the problem.  When everyone else in the world is wrong/stupid/demanding/blah blah blah why should they change.

I have seen XN use his children as extentions of himself to satisfy his grandiosity.  To make connections with people.  They were mere objects also.  Guess if someone would do it to their own kids....... well maybe that is as cruel as it gets.

axa

[whoami]

iinteresting.  I would think that any kind of treatment would have to be psychological and not medicinal.  One would have to be encouraged to stop repressing their feelings, and explore what they have rejected.  I would also think that there would be need for the power of God to be at work as well. 

After all, we know that a few people like David Berquowitz (sp?) repented in prison.  I have read his story and find it fascinating. 

[Stormchild]

Old thread that has a lot to say on this subject: worth a look.

http://www.voicelessness.com/disc3//index.php?topic=1463.0

[reallyME]

Penelope,

Its ok that you have avoided my posts.  I figured what I was sharing, would be hitting home with many people on here.  It was and is my hope, that what I typed in, would show some people that NO they are NOT imagining that the person just insulted them, by saying something that nobody with TACT would say, and that NO they didn't just imagine that the person who claimed to be a friend, denied saying something that they clearly said.

I wanted these posts to really be a chance of enlightenment and validation for the victims of people with Personality Disorders of all kinds.

At the same time, by the time I just about finished reading the book, I have come to see the N as a victim too.  I"m not justifying their mistreatment of others...I am giving a REASON behind it, so that possibly they can still be seen as being human or at least as once having been human.  EVery person was once some mama's baby, after all...the sad part is that, that baby was either not mirrored by that parent, abused by that parent, or treated like a celebrity star by that parent.

To be honest, it seems like most of the people on this board, were not the children who were treated like celebrities and spoiled by their parents...moreso, they were neglected, devalued, abused.  Seems to me that the people who were treated as child-stars, celebrities, are not even PART of this board...unless you count the few who infiltrate it from time to time to see what is being said about them.  "Stars" don't have a desire to even learn about what their actions put us through...that is just the honest truth...whereas, someone who recognizes that they were once abused/neglected, also seems to recognize that they often react as a result of those things, and usually WANTS HELP and VALIDATION,etc.

Just an observation

[Hopalong]

Pretty keen one, too, RM.

Thank you for all your very hard work to help people understand Nism.

Hope you're going to have a peaceful Christmas Eve...
Is the restaurant closed tonight? Tomorrow?

Hope you get a good rest.

Hops