Power of honesty and acceptance

[Peapod]

If Honesty and Acceptance were taken up as much as Smoking and Drinking,

What would the world be like?

Just wondering....
 
P x

[Hopalong]

Welcome, Peapod...

A whole lot better, imo!

Hopalong

[seastorm]

Welcome Peapod,

Smoking and drinking are so destructive.

Personally, I have had a lot of trouble from loved ones who drank too much and got addicted. It took me decades to find out how destructive it was to family and relationships. I was CLUELESS.
I tried love and acceptance in dealing with my alcoholic husband but with less than happy results. So I tried MORE LOVE AND ACCEPTANCE until I was the Mother Theresa of love and acceptance.
Finally I left alcoholic husband even though I loved him. I was being destroyed completely. I felt really bad because I believed that if I had enough love and acceptance i would miraculously cure him.

Now I know that was really Bonkers. Some things require professional help and specific support groups. There is a lot of information out there and one must not be shy about these things.
That is my little diatribe on Love and Acceptance.

This may not help you much. I just took a flying leap and thought maybe you might have a problem in that area. If you don't just file it under irrelevant.

Peace and love to you,
Sea storm

[Stormchild]

Sea storm - couldnt agree more.

Love is so important, so necessary. Acceptance is vital. But they have to be PART, not ALL, of what we do.

The problem with all-love-all-acceptance-all-the-time is that it still makes everything all-your-responsibility-to-deal-with-all-the-time. And things are still out of balance, then, and doing more of the same does not create the balance that is lacking...

"To every [thing there is] a season, and a time to every purpose under heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up;
A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace."

[Ecclesiastes 3: 1-8]

[seastorm]

Stormchild:

That is really lovely. And timely. It is such a beautiful way of explaining balance and boundaries and all that. The Bible is so amazing.
I still wander into unconditional love when it is not safe and this is so helpful.

Hugs,
Sea storm

[isittoolate]

quote seastorm:
"Finally I left alcoholic husband even though I loved him. I was being destroyed completely. I felt really bad because I believed that if I had enough love and acceptance i would miraculously cure him.

This happened to me. I really thought he loved me, in spite, so I gave him a year to straighten out his life [innocent me] and took our 2½ year old daughter and left. I still had hope [foolish me]

One day my lttle girl, who never left my side, put on her jacket and started out the door. I asked where she was going. "To look for Daddy", she said. My heart fell apart. I stood at the doorway and watched her as she walked down the sidewalk, obviously with NO idea where she was going. I finally went after her when I saw she was not going to stop.

Another time in the pouring rain, we were sitting at the kitchen window and I was trying to make her feel comfortable during this thunderstorm (thunder terrified her) when a train whistle blew. She said, "Daddy must be on that train coming to see me". Again I deflated. What guilt trips I accepted! and she was too young to explain the reasons why we weren't with Daddy. (He's the one who killed himself when she was 15.)

I really felt that I had let her down, and she was too young to know when he was at his worst and beating me.  I had NO info or experience on alcoholism at the time (1966)..... never really knew what a difficult addiction it was to overcome.

IZZy

[seastorm]

Izzy,
What a devastating experience. There was so little help for single moms then, either information or financial help. I know I took everything on and blamed myself. I was raising a little girl too and she missed her dad all the time.
If a miracle could happen I would wish that you didn't take other people's behaviour so personally. They are on their own journey too.

Well, Peapod, you sure got something going here.  Where are you?????????? Are you getting the answers you want? It was hard to respond because there wasn't enough information there. For me, it helps if there is a bit of a story attached. I know it takes a lot of courage to write in.  Don't give up.

Sea storm