This is my first post, but wanted to tell you that 30 years ago (while in the early stages of dealing with the N in my life) I asked my then therapist if there was some way to test the character of the person I was beginning to date. He said..on the second or third date when you are planning to go somewhere fairly nice (so the N will be clean and dressed) tell him when he arrives that you have had an emergency with your car (which, of course, will need to be real..a flat tire being the best. The emergency will be that you need the car early the next morning. Ask that he change the flat for you and watch the reaction.
I, frankly thought that was really far out, and when I have told that to people since then, they have looked at me as if I have a second head. But, after 22 years of dealing with this N, I now...just now...realize that what he was telling me was true.
Little miracles, one right after the other have been occuring over the last few weeks, culminating in my finding this site. Thank Heaven. I am so glad to be here. Am the daugter of a N mother. The story of how that has affected my life (I am now 60), would take too long to tell. Let me just say I belong here. I have so much to learn. I need to be here and I am so grateful that all of you are here. Sally
