---and now a word from your spinster---

[debkor]

Izzy,

Wow.  I say send it. Give it to her and give it to yourself by letting it go out to her.  Don't pass this opportunity.  Don't keep it for when your gone *a long time away from now* for her to find without being able to respond.

Jump in Girl, take the chance.  Maybe she will respond right away or not but give it to her now.

I don't think theres a person on here that wouldn't have loved to have that letter from their mom.

What a gift you will give to her.  You will give her validation of *mixed feelings* and that you are as human as she is.

That is the ultimate Gift!

You know we can be left money *lots of it* live good but it does not take away those words you wish you heard.

You have them Izzy sent them out, give her what she will think about for the rest of her life, ease her heart.

Who knows she may stand all big and tuff because she is not ready to think about what she needs to but those words will always be planted in her mind *her lock box* and she will always go back to look at them.

This is your Gift even if you don't get back right away or ever.    It is completely a GIFT! with nothing expected in return. 
This is your baby *give it to her* let her soak it in.

I bet if you asked all the people on here would say that if they had that letter it would of made a world of difference in their healing with their moms. 


Love
Deb

[Hopalong]

Izzy, that's your heart voice.
Do send it...off with a blessing.

Maybe in a month you'll do it again.

It was just wonderful, Izz...

love to you,
Hops

[isittoolate]

It appears that those responding are all in favour of--sending

After my homework pages I have to wonder if my opimion has slipped a bit?????????????????

[Hopalong]

Whoa, Nelly.
Homework pages, Iz?
If your therapist is advising you to write this poetry as part of an exercise in healing yourself (not in connecting with D right yet)...
I'd say, trust this woman's advice. She seems to be guiding you well.

Hops

[isittoolate]

Whoa Nelly and hops,
The homework was not that poem, it is in another thread, to write about all the times I was angry with my daughter.

It is enlightening, as I go over it step by step and I am having new thoughts!

Izzy

[Hopalong]

Kudos to you, Izzy.

Do you feel you're going at things in a new way now, with this T?

I am feeling awfully good when I read about it.


 

Hops

[isittoolate]

hi hops

Yes I think this was good and it also gives the therapist some fodder for questions that I'll have to answer.

I cannot remember being angry with my daughter until she was 14 and nearly fell of a cliff and died. She was hanging on, legs overboard and piles of  broken glass under her hands.

I found out frrom a bill from the Hospital. I was really angry at the Camp Counsellors,  and first was daughter dying on me. Then I knew it was fear that now she was old enough to go to these places-------and we all know anything can happen ay any given moment

Love
Izzy

[Margo]

Yes. Margo,

There ought to be textbook, a class, whatever on LIFE
No. 1) It ain't easy
No 2.) It's yours 'til you die! (or 68 whichever comes first!)



Ya know...... when I was single and happy and waxing my car every weekend?  I was also busy writing writing writing in my journal about how to save children, early on, from their FOOs. 

I wanted there to be a class on it in high school.  I wanted there to be a class in gradeschool.  I wanted the little people in 3yo and pre K and K classes with healing people asking them the right questions and and and and........ giving them the right answers.  Explaining to them that their treatment didn't define them, it just explained how broken their parents were.  They were just fine and didn't need to internalize their familie's behavior. 

Here, children... turn to page 47.... here is an example of a healthy family unit.  The children would be practicing piano and the french horn..... their little martial arts gear hung in the background neatly.  The parents would be busy making dinner and being proactive helping their children prepare themselves for their day, tomorrow.  The parents would care about their children as much as they cared about themselves and everyone would be able to speak their true feelings and feel heard... blah blah blah and on it would go.  I'm sure I could have gone on and on and on and never gotten it right.

Kids don't even think about these things.  They don't get to come up for air, so to speak, IMO.  Heck..... I would write a list of innapropriate behaviors and list them in that book..... just so the kids could identify what's happening TO THEM as wrong.  Lable their parents responsible and wrong instead of letting their familie's lable them. KWIM?  Ahhhh... I have to get kids ready for school!!!!

::Shaking head::  I sure didn't get much out of World Religions or Homec classes, lol.  A real world experience life's skills to survive your FOO class would have come in very handy though, lol.  Margo