My way of saying that I am not looking forward to brother and sister visit--

[isittoolate]

In a week they will leave their homes to fly West to the Rockies for a horseback riding ranch, likely near Jasper? After 2 weeks they will catch a short flight to see me from Saturday afternoon Aug 4, 5 until whatever time we part on Sunday night. They are staying at a Bed and Breakfast here and will depart from B&B very early Monday morning, by shuttle, to get back to their flight home to Ontario.

My therapist looked weirdly at me when I said that as soon as I heard my brother's plans, I said "DAMN!" then I double-damned when my sister said she was joining him.

At  least it was 6 months away when I talked to my brother at Christmas.



(with a nervousd lump in my chest I just sent this email to both of them.

After all this time, the time is drawing near and it is real.
 
I am a nervous wreck. I have been for 6 months! That's why I am in therapy!
 
I feel like I'm gonna get paralyzed and not be able to do a thing.
 
What worries me the most, Wes, is your allergy to cig. smoke. I smoke so little (about 5 a day--but you two will make it 10 a day--) yet the odour is here because I do get up in the night, and mornings am in my nightie for the balcony., and can't carry coffe up the ramp. The rug cleaner is coming. but that doesn't cover everything. I do have the balcony for if and when you are here-- am ramped to go out.
 
If you can put up with the fact that I cannot close my bathroom door, and we know about the smoke we can work it out as I expect we will dine out for both dinners and maybe have 1 lunch here--or not? I won't overload on food that will spoil----
 
Want beer Wes?  wine Ruth? white or red-------- what % of alcohol?
 
and I  have my new sour cherry juice with aronia---that's what led to the chokecherries, Wes.
 
and I was even wrong there--what were they Ruth??  mulberries? blackberries? -----???
 
Oh will I get the dusting done or not???------------lol---- if you are like me you wouldn't notice anyway
 
Oh No! The white coats are at the door!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Hopalong]

Awww, Izzy.
I think you're being very sweet.

Try not to care so much about the details, hon.
I think all those details about wine and smoke really mean:

It means so much to me that you are coming.
I haven't seen family in so long that I'm a little scared,
bear with me! I want you to enjoy our visit too

I really think it'll be okay, hon. And if it ain't, you know
we'll be here...

My hope for you is that you try to stay in the present
with them, and just enjoy things that are present, as
relaxed as you know how to be. Go with the flow of the
visit. Don't set yourself up with too many fantasiies, okay?

love
Hops

[isittoolate]

awwwwww

Thankis Hops

It's been over 10 years since I saw them, and they saw me last before i met this great guy and then was traumatized by the N (same guy)

OMG

It'll be okay

xxxxxxxxxx
Izzy

[gratitude28]

I love hopsy's response, Iz... And it's true. They aren't expecting Heloise... they also might be nervous like you...

((((((((((((((((((((((((Izzy)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Love, Beth

[isittoolate]

Oh ya--Hints from Heloise

I read her whole book when I was on vacation in Baton Rouge in '81

well I'm going to take them to see Layer Cake mountain, up Close,

http://www.kelownagolfski.com/Gallaghers/kelowna-layer-cake-mountain.JPG

and this is my trial run today re showing them Knox Mountain, that I can see right off my balcony

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lk-Ny0RrnUs


xx
Izzy

[Overcomer]

Iz I hate having guests stay too.  It makes me a nervous wreck!  But it will be fun catching up wont it?

[bigalspal]

Izzy,
Honey, I know what you mean. Anytime I think I might have to see my brothers makes me queasy.
We grew up in the worst envoirment. We have issues with each other as well as our NMother & lapdog father. It's their father, MY stepfather.
My oldest of the 2 baby brothers is the "Golden Child". He, to this day, tattles to NMother! He's 43! The littlest one acts like NMother to an extent. He's 41. So, I only like to meet with them in a neutral spot. But I know one day they will end up HERE, at my house. Scary!
Oh Izzy, I SMOKE TOO! But in my case, both my brothers smoke, so that would not be an issue.
But it sure is with the rest of the world. I KNOW it's not a good thing, but I am NOT a bad PERSON.
I am very respectful of Non Smokers. More than they are of me! That's a whole other topic. Don't get me started on that issue!
Good luck, Izzy!
Bigalspal

[lighter]

Awwww, Izzy.

It sounds like you do want them to come and enjoy a visit with you.

you're e mail sounded upbeat and honest and like you care.

Let us know what thier response is. 

[isittoolate]

Did you checvk the links in my last post?---- my driving???

From my brother

 I will survive any tobacco smoke, I have done it for years when on fishing trips.  It is only for a day and a half and not all the time.   I expect we will dine out and we can sit and chat wherever. We will be arriving at the airport at about 10:45 AM on Saturday and then going to our B & B.  We will call you and probably get to your place around lunch time, but we can work out lunch arrangements depending on what happens.   I expect we will spend the after noon with you and have dinner.  I also expect we will be tired (and sore) and crash fairly early.   Sunday, as you are not an early riser, I expect we will meet up around noon and repeat the day before (but talk about different things  ) ) and  we are out of there early on Monday AM (7:00 ) for Calgary and home.   The cigs and bathroom door are a none issue.

I will undoubtedly enjoy a cold beer or two or three both days,  Ruth may enjoy some white wine.  As far as lunch goes, if we are going to be together for lunch - we can order in Pizza ( reminds me of Peterborough - I think it was mushrooms, pepperoni and green pepper you liked) or whatever - don't stock pile food. 

I would rather spend time chatting than having you concerned about preparing meals.  Remember - we just spent 5 days in the mountains - everything will look good
 
Looking forward to seeing you,  forget the white jackets
 
Love

from my sister
 I totally, totally agree with Wes.  We will be there to see you and visit with you (although I am still hoping there might be a wee tour of Kelowna).  As Wes says, after five days in the mountains and on horse back, anything will be luxury.  I think pizza sounds good, too, so you won’t have anything drying up/cooling off/heating up while we dither about getting ourselves straightened out.

 We love you just the way you are.  Ciggies, dust, nightie, bathroom door, whatever.

 White wine sounds good, but I am practically a non-drinker so don’t load up on something that you will not want to finish yourself.  I love water.

 All you have to think about is where we can go for dinner, and enjoy wondering what we will look like hobbling in on our bow-legs and probably preferring to stand.

 I am very eager to see you again.  How long has it been?

 Love

 

 

[lighter]

Kendall Jackson Chardonnay is between 9.00 and 12.00 a bottle.  Great wine at a decent price. 

I hope this visit is good you all. 

Sounds like you don't have to worry about the cigs and bathroom door.... sounds like your sibs want to catch up and enjoy a relaxed visit with you.   

[Hopalong]

IZZY YOU CAN'T DO IT WRONG!

THESE PEOPLE ARE GOOD!

DON'T PROVE ANYTHING!

LAUGH!

BE HAPPY!

 

love you.
Hops

[isittoolate]

Yes, one can tell from their mail.............


It's been 9-12 years.

I was most worried about the cig smoke as quite some time ago, my brother went dizzy, fell and hit his head (policeman) After that he was VERY allergic to smoke and his wife smokes-- She goes outside and has done some 15 years, to smoke. There is an extra family car-- a smoking car--it as for wife and daughter.

He was badly affected by the smoke. I see things have changed with the years.

Whenever he visited me back then, I aired out the place well in advance, smoked outside awaiting him, and then had a 2-3 hour visit and away he went and I lit up again inside!. This time is overnight.

all will be well

Thanks
Izzy

[isittoolate]

Situations- number one on my priority list is my disability , if a situation can't fit into the way I manage my limitations it has to go

I copied my post to WRITE (starting over) and put it here, as it qualifies re the visit!