"I get manipulated without really realizing it."
My husband and I are constantly getting invited to his family parties and we wrestle over whether or not to go because we know how strong the N influence is with them and we are not sure if we can avoid slipping back into old patterns. So, we do what we feel strong enough to do....That is enough for now, I tell myself.
We are working and gaining some ground. Don't you think? Practice, I guess and lots of it! I find myself just listening in the moment. Slowing things down in the conversation so I can see the "signs" and hear the healthy coach in me explain my next move. And I have finally convinced myself that the tactics won't stop. That all the jumping thru hoops I do will not change it. I have to take responsibility for my side and let go of controlling the N-side (so I don't get hurt) and protect myself in much less strenuous ways. Like "not really giving a crap what she tries."
Much love to you. We will conquer! I believe!!
-Mof4
