an accident

[isittoolate]

Willtay

Poem? i am confused!

??????????????????

Lizzy

[bigalspal]

Izzy,
Dang, girl! What HELL you went through!
Only the folks on this board will not think I'm an "N" when I say, I think one of the reasons you lived, was that we needed you here, on this board, to help us lost souls navigate this world!
I know you've helped me!
XXXXXXOOOO's
Bigalspal
 

[motheroffour]

My heart thoughts are with you today.

-much love
mof4

[wiltay]

Izzy,  I've read works that are called poems that have the style and cadences of your story.  It's a matter of rhythm, (like a musical piece repeating the same beat in the background), not rhyme.  That's what I felt reading it.
Bill

[isittoolate]

Thank you MO4, BAP, and BILL

-=-for your visit and for your comments, and Bill for saying my prose is as poetry. Yes, you may put it on your wall, but do you think your visitors might think you are weird? <grin> sadistic?

Love
Izzy

[finding peace]

Dear Izzy,

You a remarkable and inspirational person.

I think writing a book is a great idea - your story is one of survival and courage. 

Love,
Peace

[lighter]

The creative process...... putting BIG life's lessons down for others to learn from...... watching you grow and...... uhhhh..... if you become famouse...... you are taking us all to Hawaii, right, lol? 

[sally]

Oh, Izzy, my heart really breaks for you.  Why, oh why were people so uncaring?  No one to comfort you, tell you about disability benefits. And all the pain that you felt.  I can only imagine that you were very afraid.  I’m so sorry for what you went through. 

((((((((((((((((Izzy))))))))))))))))))))

I can imagine how grateful you must has felt when the nurse washed you hair.  It must have felt wonderful.

It was the most fantastic feeling in my life—dying.
It sounds like you had a near death experience.  Did you see the light?

Yes, you are an excellent writer.  Your story reads like a screenplay in that you describe the events in a very visual manner.  When reading it, I felt like I was there.

So, how does it make you feel to describe your accident?

You are an amazing and talented woman, a survivor with a great sense of humor.

Thank you for sharing your story.

love,
sally

[isittoolate]

Aw
finding peace
lighter and
sally

I had no idea this would bring such responses, as writing a book and alluding to the fact I could do that!

I also never realized until I talked of this, the strength I must have had to get through it--- I was propelled by Fear and fear of failure and of course to be back on my own with my little girl.

Do you know it took my therapist to notice and make me realize the full extent of "going through all this alone without any support".

Yes, Sally, that night I was going home to wash my hair--- that was somewhat delayed. That was so caring of that night nurse!

My date (3rd date) wanted to get me in the sack and even borrowed a buddy's key for his apartment with the expectation. When he told me, I said "No! I meant it. as I wanted to wash my hair, set it and prepare a bit for a girl friend who was coming for the next day & ½. He tromped on the gas and was speeding at 120 mph. I was scared out of my wits and was paralyzed before I was actually paralyzed. His obvious 'sense of entitlement" has me wondering if he is an N.,

He lost control of the car and it rolled 3 rimes, skidding 975 feet. I was being tossed and said to myself, "Izzy, you are being in one hell of a car crash."

Since this was so long ago, it is just another tale of part of my life. I've told the therapist that I see my life as a wheel (wagon, I guess). I am the hub and all my experiences are the spokes, but there is no rim to connect one with the other. They just poke out into empty air.

The light(s) I saw, sally, were my own twinkling coloured lights, as well as the sky had turned all pastel shades from the actual gray of 2:00 a.m. No doctor was present so I don't know if my heart stopped or not, but I sure feel and remember being away up in the air and 'leaving'

As I might have said I wrote at chronology for a friend of mine who had so many questions. It was 14 pages long.

There are so many stories and I even had the therapist laughing at one. It's a very important one though that shows every patient is not just a chart on the wall.

Thanks everyone for thinking such good thoughts and sending them to me
love
Izzy

[lighter]

I think you should really get your mind wrapped around that book.  You can do it.  You can write,  Izzy.   

[spyralle]

Hi Izzy,

I agree with the others you are a very beautiful writer.  Can I ask you something.  Do you think that bad things change us for the better..?  i just know that when my partner died I felt like my heart had been ripped out.  I wanted to die to yet now I wonder if it hadn't happened would I have taken so much notive of life and my soul and other stuff that I won't bore you with..  Did you change?

Love

Spyralle xxxxxxxxxxxxx

[debkor]

Izzy,

I sit and read your post and your life stories and I am amazed.  I don't think I could be half the person you are.  I think you are an incredible brave person even through fear. 

Sometimes I don't know what to say to you and I always look for your stories about your life.  You had slowed down a bit and I was going through withdrawal.

I don't know what you think of yourself Izzy but you are an inspiration to me.  People can learn from you. You have very much to offer. WRITE THAT BOOK!!

Deb

[isittoolate]

THANK YOU DEB,

LOOK AT MY POST ON MOTHEROFFOUR'S LAST THREAD.

o sorry caps.

When I "slow down a bit" is because I have the one problem, with feelings, and often cannot think of anything to help another in his/her thread.

I am no longer involved with an N--long time and it can be upsetting to read what might be currently happening to someone.

So I say I am not in touch with my feelings, but my mind knows I am upset-- My mind knows what is sad, happt etc.

I related my life to my therapist and I didn't shed a tear or choke up--the truth is the truth.  I last cried in 1993--??

So could could begin this thread with a detached feeling.

Love (that means I care, in my head)

Izzy

[debkor]

Izzy,

I am who you have seen in my posts--straight forward and no fancy delusions, and far less descriptive language than I see others are able to use.

That's ok with me Izzy.  You rank way up there with me.  Even wearing a plastic bag over your head.  I still laugh over that.
As far as less descriptive language? Maybe so?  But being non descriptive is not you.  I can picture everything in my head like I'm watching a movie when you tell your story. 

Deb

[isittoolate]

spyralle

Hello there,

I don't know if bad things make us better, but they make us sit up and take notice, and if we're smart we never repeat what caused the 'bad' thing. So to that effect we are "better".

I also believe that God does not give us anything we cannot handle (that's for you too mo4) I have some kind of inner strength  that I don't see in some people, and know they would sit back and deteriorate after such an accident. Then again, I could be wrong, because perhaps those people have not yet been 'challenged'.

I can say now that everything that has happened to me has 'taught' me something so that I ought to know it all by the time I die <grin>

I don't know if this is helepful to you, or uf it sounds like a crock, but I try to say what's in my mind.

Love
Izzy