Author Topic: My mother's sleep  (Read 13173 times)

moonlight52

  • Guest
Re: My mother's sleep
« Reply #15 on: August 02, 2007, 01:36:00 PM »
Hops  ,

All the posts have said all you need to know with such kindness.
It is such a Blessing to be 96 and just to sleep peacefully.

So much love to you,
moon

WRITE

  • Guest
Re: My mother's sleep
« Reply #16 on: August 02, 2007, 05:56:00 PM »
There is a poem by Bengali writer Rabindranath Tagore which says

Peace, my heart, let the time for the parting be sweet.
Let it not be a death but completeness.
Let love melt into memory and pain into songs.
Let the flight through the sky end in the folding of the wings over the nest.
Let the last touch of your hands be gentle like the flower of the night.
Stand still, O Beautiful End, for a moment, and say your last words in silence.
I bow to you and hold up my lamp to light you on your way.


That's how I see the end of life and ageing now, and the moving on to the next place, whether we call that memory or heaven or earth or light or whatever people individually believe....we have been taught to fear the pain of it and can easily miss the blessedness of the precious hours.

I think courage is about letting the other go where they will, staying beside them and trusting them with their life.

yes Axa, and she is both being held with love and safety beyond me and lives within you, even though you cry.

If I were there with you I would hold you, and cry with you, and paint pictures of your baby, and let you share mine (((((((((((((((((((((((((( ))))))))))))))))))))))

~W

lighter

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 8631
Re: My mother's sleep
« Reply #17 on: August 02, 2007, 06:10:05 PM »
Write.... I'm speechless.

That was so beautiful.

moonlight52

  • Guest
Re: My mother's sleep
« Reply #18 on: August 02, 2007, 07:54:09 PM »
(((((((((((((((((((((())))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Write so beautiful

m

Hopalong

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 13616
Re: My mother's sleep
« Reply #19 on: August 02, 2007, 10:04:30 PM »
Oh gaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrshhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

I feel bonkers

My mother is powered by a battery stronger than my own

Once again I began my inner goodbyes, tiptoed to her room, etc. Slept lightly, woke at 4:00 a.m.

Put in a long workday, got a call from her morning companion, who'd stayed the day...

Home at 6:30...Mom's up, sitting in the LR reading, nibbling on a sandwich...making sense, perfectly fine.

What a roller coaster.

I am so sorry for...for what? For a false alarm? Feeling like the sister of the boy who cried wolf? The confusion I feel?

I've lost count of the private farewells and I'm afraid when she does pass away (at 106) it'll have been so rehearsed in my head I'll be numb and witless.

Bless all of you for your kindness and forgive me, but I'm sure I'll call on it again.

xxxxxxxxoooooooo,
Hops
"That'll do, pig, that'll do."

Certain Hope

  • Guest
Re: My mother's sleep
« Reply #20 on: August 02, 2007, 10:07:29 PM »
(((((((Hops)))))))

I'm... speechless  :)

With love,
Hope

lighter

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 8631
Re: My mother's sleep
« Reply #21 on: August 02, 2007, 10:30:06 PM »
Oh Hops, lol. 

I was just thinking of you.

I thought I'd find you sitting next to your mother's bed.... silently watching her.

So.... she was sitting up eating a sandwich huh?

She must of needed that nap: )

isittoolate

  • Guest
Re: My mother's sleep
« Reply #22 on: August 02, 2007, 11:00:15 PM »
(((((((((((((Hops))))))))))))))))))

Well! My My Goodness

something left undone--??? That'll be me--forgot to dust the china cabinet.

Your Mom is something else.

Best to you both
Izzy

WRITE

  • Guest
Re: My mother's sleep
« Reply #23 on: August 02, 2007, 11:26:28 PM »
Feeling like the sister of the boy who cried wolf? The confusion I feel?

I've lost count of the private farewells and I'm afraid when she does pass away (at 106) it'll have been so rehearsed in my head I'll be numb and witless.


no, I think this is probably you preparing for the future Hops. You've had so many emotions around your mother, your psyche is taking no chances for her passing! I'm glad she's feeling better and hope she is also feeling kind....

Don't be too hard on yourself Hops, you've had the patience of a saint with your mother, I know I would have hastened her end by now  :)

What was on her sandwich anyway?

WRITE

  • Guest
Re: My mother's sleep
« Reply #24 on: August 02, 2007, 11:38:19 PM »
These things are so subtle and you will cherish every memory when you look back. 

including the sandwich.

Much love to everyone, goodnight y'all (((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((  )))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Hopalong

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 13616
Re: My mother's sleep
« Reply #25 on: August 03, 2007, 12:15:40 AM »
Swiss cheese.
I withheld the pickles because of the acid.

The doc thinks the anti-nausea pill knocked her out.

I feel so stupid and a bit as though I got such deep and inspirational and moving support...prematurely.   :oops:

And I feel odd that my instincts are off.

(She's being kind...or not unkind. Has been mellow for a good while now, because the depradations her body's been through. She just doesn't have the energy for much N-ness any more. And I'm grateful, because whenever this chapter does end, it will end peacefully.)

Thank you again, patient people...

with love, a grateful
Hops
"That'll do, pig, that'll do."

gratitude28

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 2582
Re: My mother's sleep
« Reply #26 on: August 03, 2007, 01:39:13 PM »
((((((((((((((((((((((Hops)))))))))))))))

It is healthy and imporatant that you be ready for the end. Because you will have so many conflicting feelings and you do want to do waht is right for both of you. No easy task and no right answer. However, you can see from all the responses here that we feel you are doing a lovely job with your mother and there is no reason to be embarrassed in asking what to do. I also would have said to let her sleep if that is what she needed. So the Energizer Bunny is back and moving along :) Don't feel guilt for anything, dear Hops. You are a thoughful and kind caretaker.

Love, Beth
"There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable." Douglas Adams

isittoolate

  • Guest
Re: My mother's sleep
« Reply #27 on: August 03, 2007, 01:47:25 PM »
Yes you are, Hops

and don't feel odd at all

I was putting in mind different scenarios for when the Sibs come (tomorrow) and the Therapist said it was all right to be prepared for what might arise---as one of my thoughts was that they would insist I move back there.

I think I have often done this and what you have done was more or less a practise run which may be helpful for you at the real end.

Love to you and your MoM


Izzy

mudpuppy

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 1276
Re: My mother's sleep
« Reply #28 on: August 03, 2007, 02:26:28 PM »
Quote
The doc thinks the anti-nausea pill knocked her out.

To think you could have been slipping her some of these with her swiss cheese sandwiches all these years. :P

mud

teartracks

  • Guest
Re: My mother's sleep
« Reply #29 on: August 03, 2007, 05:25:58 PM »



Hops, I send you lots of hugs,

My mom spends the best part of four days a week in bed resting and or sleeping.

About a year ago she was sleeping even more.  We took her to the doctor.  Everything checked out AOK.  When we got home she said, I'm tired of being hacked about sleeping too much.  I'm going to sleep all I want.  She spoke her peace.  That is what I will abide by.  I'm sorry I  don't know if this will help.

Love,
tt