Asserting Myself---

[Poppyseed]

Hope,     I am lol!  Funny girl!

Izzy,  Ok.  I just have to ask...... Can you feel it when you break something?  You sound so used to it.  Almost like it is breaking a dish in the kitchen. Which makes me smile at your strength. But I worry about how much pain you are in.

Poppy

[lighter]

::SIGH::

Oh Izzy....

I guess there isn't any pain but.... sweetie.....

I just hate that you have to go through that.

What in the heck makes it so hard to keep from falling?

Does your therapist need to meet you in the lot and help you get back into the car....

or....

something?

You livein f'n Canada for cripes sake!

Canada is populated with a whole bunch of very nice people, eh?

Ask for some help.... esp when you're feeling weak and a off.

TED BUNDY got young girls to help him!

Ask some strapping young men to help!

That's an order.

[isittoolate]

  Hope

Nope, No autographs yet!---never ever thought of that, even with the others.

     Poppyseed

Breaking a dish! Hmph! Well a very good analogy. All my breaks have been below the knees and I have no pain, heat, cold, feeling there. I just hear 'snaps' and know something is broken and away I go for an x-ray and a cast.

The paramedics told me that anyone else would be ripping their faces off and screaming with the pain. Likely when I act so nonchalant, in comparison, no one worries as much--not sure. Anyway but this long legged cast is pinching my inner thigh between it and the toilet seat. I feel like screaming but it would do no good. My skin is bruised. I have also heard the bones move in there while lifting it fom place to place, but am not weight-bearing.

Aas far as the pain I do not feel, it is a bit of a conundrum to wonder if the pain/non pain is having any effect!

   Lighter

I had a nice taxi driverr drive me to my car. He was very helpful, getting me into his front seat, put w/ch in the trunk. We chit-chatted then arrived at therapist's place. I was able to swing my legs aout and get into my chair, then he wheeled me to my car and it was like fitting me into cereal box, but we finally made it. Driver's seat was further back becasue of stiff cast. He was going to put my chair into my trunk   and I knee-jerked a response, kind of a yell, NO NO-- as antyone with a brain knows I would never get to it there. I think he realized that and then wouldn't listen to me as he shoved it in the passenger door to behind my seat. I knew I was in trouble. I needed it done my way, in from the driver's door so I would know i'd be okay.

I tipped him and he left.

I drove home using both throttle and brakes on hand controls and all was fine, until I tried to get out. I was in the underground parking for about 3/4 hour. I tried everything I could to get a start at getting out and just went from one idea to another. I finally did it and all was well.

I need practices. there.

I saw my therapist when there and I had emailed her about my leg, so she knew why I was there, She has emailed back and telephoned me yesterday. She has a little room for early arrivers to sit in while the previous one is finishing up. I might not fit it, but I can only try. If that doesn't work , I wait in a foyer and she will come and get me.

Just the car...... just the car to try again but all MY way.

Falling? old age, weakness, bad blood, low potassium, nervous from previous falls, I will see my Dr. soon for meds and we'll talk.

Thank for writing me gals as this has put a big STOP sign in my life., or so I feel. I always think with every break I am being told to slow now. I do thinks quickly and was going to do my own thing at the hospital and they had to keep telling me to relax. THEY would take care of me.

Much Love
Izzy

[isittoolate]

OMG
Am I ever weak! Anyone know why?

I barely made ˝ block to get to the bank, and was on my way to the Library. I stopped at Drug Store first and I was even weaker. I set out for Library and asked the first sane looking person to please push me. She did and didn't even turn left at the corner, to go to her place, she turned right and took me all the way to the Library.

The 2 blocks to get home , I was all alone, a seldom walked street and wondered if I'd make it.

Maybe I weakened when I was fighting to get in and out of the taxi and my car, yesterday.

I knew a guy who was full of cancer and no one knew it, not even him. Then he was in a car crash and it 'set fire' to the cancer cells and he was a goner.

I feel like a goner!

Izzy

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[lighter]

Izzy.....

I want to talk to you for a moment.

It's OK to ask for help.

It's OK to tell people that you're struggling... and ask for help.

I do it all the time trying to scramble around for babysitters. 

I hate it but.... I don't want to miss parent teacher meetings and open houses at the girl's schools.

I don't want to miss courtdates and doctor appointments.

So I ask.... and I don't worry what I look like,

mostly: /

A person who doesn't have any family that can or will help her.

Sad but there it is.

Ask..... set things up ahead of time.  Have someone there in the parking garage when you arrive. 

Have someone set up to push you from the Library.

I met the most adorable Eagle Scout at my oldest dd's school the other day!  He'd be wonderful at this sort of thing!

Ask... please. 

It's OK. 

[CB123]

Iz,

It could easily be the potassium levels again.  They can really throw you out of whack and you've had trouble in the past.  Did you say that your doctor was going to check them again?  Can you make a call and see if that can be done more quickly?  Sound the alarm to your doctor--that's what he's there for.  It's the 21st century, there's no point in living with that kind of imbalance for one second. 

Iz, we care about you.  Please let us know how you are.  Lots of updates, okay?

Love
CB

[isittoolate]

Thanks lighter

I did ask!! Today!!

The last time I broke this leg was 1984 and I was walking on crutches-- I still had my strength and could manage fine.

This time my arms are so weak, but I am 23 years older.

I have to know what I am going to be doing to find someone to help.

I come and go as I please, but  maybe not now!

Izzy

[isittoolate]

Thanks CB

I will call and make an app't. Have to anyway, cuz of meds running out soon.

As well, my body is away off balance with the cast dragging down the right side. I loaded 3 towels under my right thigh--might add more if these squish ---- and it feels better---taking the strain off it. Balance is everything.

Thanks for caring
Izzy

[Certain Hope]

Iz, I hope you have an appointment made... a very soon one.

Waiting to hear.

Oh, I wondered if a piece of foam between the top rim of cast and your skin... you know, that smooshy memory foam stuff?
Might help and less bulky than towels.

Still waiting to hear.

Love,
Hope

[Stormchild]

Hi Iz

It may be a good idea to have your doc check your vitamin D levels.

Here's an article by Alan Gaby, who used to be at NIH, on the effects of vitamin D deficiency.

He wrote this in 2004. Now, more and more studies are proving him right.

The effect on balance is almost unbelievable.

http://www.townsendletter.com/July2004/gabyeditorial0704.htm

If any of this sounds sensible to you, then talk to your doc, because the interaction of vitamin D with calcium, etc., is tricky. But given that you have limited mobility, live in the North, smoke, do not get much sunlight, etc., you are at risk of osteoporosis - these are all risk factors, I know you can't help them. Vitamin D supplementation can help that problem too. And now they know that it helps ladies of a certain age, such as myself and yourself, much more than they used to think it did.

Good luck, Iz. I am amazed by the things you have endured, and the things you continue to endure. I could not handle for ten minutes what you have dealt with for years.

Maybe vitamin D can help reduce those things by one or two, anyway. Please look at the article and at least consider it...

[isittoolate]

Hi Hope,

I was so tired I went and lay down to read and slept for 2 hours. It's 7"30 now. I will get the doctor tomorrow, but he won't see this as an emergency,  Been trying for years to find another.

The towels are to raise the level of my right thigh to the level of my left so as my lap is balanced. Need balance for proper moving. As far as something between the cast and my leg, I haven't found anything around the house, yet, that will fit there and stay. I tried a face cloth. I want something soft and stiff -------------No! not THAT!

(And I thought I had done a good job of sorting and throwing out odds and ends and things I no longer needed. One was 2-3-4 pairs of those wide-legged shorts, forget the name, like skirts, oh, skorts? that would fit over the cast where my clam diggers don't)

Hi Stormchild

That is a wonderful article. I stay out of the sun (but I got skin cancer anyway) and all those other benefits sound wonderful. I NEED THEM. I'll print that and take to the doctor. He might not know.

How did you come up with that so fast?--or did you already know. I didn't know!

Love
Izzy

[Hopalong]

Izzy ditto every word about getting help.
Time for you to contact agencies that are SUPPOSED to help people in your shoes!

I am so so sorry you're going through this. It is such horrible luck.

You're wise to reevaluate and consider it a wakeup, and you are SO smart, organized, and capable.

If you can swallow your allergic-to-assistance thingy, you could line up a lot of sensible services,
public nurses popping in, disability paymenst while you're off work (I hope?), whatever's out there
that you qualify for...

You are an amazing, amazing person Miz Izz. You deserve to be part of a 3-D community, and
you are very precious to this one.

lots of love,
Hops

[Certain Hope]

Hi Izzy,

Not sure how, but in googling "tic disorders - laughter" I stumbled across this article:

http://ayjw.org/articles.php?id=847382

Says that “Enzyme In Pineapple Can Harden Your Bones”  (the fresh stuff, not canned or processed)

I hope you'll ask for and receive any help you need today and find plenty of reasons to smile.

With love,
Hope

[Poppyseed]

Izzy,

Who is helping you?  I feel like I need to bring you dinner!  Is anyone bringing you dinner? Cleaning your dishes?  Vaccuming the floor?   Tell me who to call!!!

I am thinking of you Iz!  I hate it when our bodies betray us!

Love and goo,
Poppy

PS.  Imagine me at your door with warm, homemade dinner and a toilet brush!  Put me to work! 

[lighter]

Iz... I was thinking more along the lines of getting the phone numbers of folks who are always AT the places YOU GO. 

Who is at the library that can come out and assist you?  A guard you giggle with regularly? 

Whos is at your place of residence that can pop down to the garage and help out with the loading and unloading?

Surely there's some character that works from home or recieved a bit too much in that trust fund from Uncle Frank?  Who's heart and life would be broadened by having to get out of that stained t shirt 3 or 8 times a week, splash some water on his pits and rush down to assist a maiden in distress?

THINK WOMAN!

IS THERE an Eagle Scout within 4 blocks of you? 

That your therapist will get her butt out there to help in the future is a given, right?

Who are the people you giggle with, Izzy? 

I promise you..... they would feel honored if self sufficient tuffy Izz asked them for help. 

You always seem so capable.... it's never occurred that you need help.... tell them. 

((Izzy))