Sun,
I talked about my dad in one of the other threads. I think he knows my mom is wrong in many ways. He will talk about her and complain about the ways she acts and the things she says. He will do nothing to change things. Here's an example.
About three or four years ago, my father was drinking a lot. My mother abhors alcohol, and she bitches about it if anyone takes a drink in her presence. My parents used to fight a lot, so much that when my son was a baby, I had a bag packed because I was afraid the situation was going to get violent. At that time, I really felt sorry for my mother, even though she'd hurt me. My father was angry a lot, and when he got upset, he scared me. I was actually afraid he'd get drunk and kill my mother. This situation all came to a head when he went hunting, got drunk, and my mother ended up getting locked out of the house. He was down in the woods with my brother when my mom called him to come unlock the door. They had a huge fight over it. But the whole thing started over being locked out.
I'm assuming she called my father and raged at him in front of my son, but I don't know that for sure. She waited until I got home from work, before the two of them went outside to scream at each other some more. She ended up getting a gun and threatening suicide. Well, my father came inside and got me and told me to go outside and get the gun away from her. I wasn't comfortable with this. My mother has never been what I would consider emotionally stable. So I went out to talk to her, and she wouldn't give up the gun. I told her if she didn't give me the gun I was going to call 911. I did.
My father was pissed because the cops descended on the house, and my mother was taken to the hospital. My father refused to go to the hospital. I had to go. I had to talk to the psychologist, with my mother (whom I was terrified of) in the room with me, and I didn't have the guts to commit her. She talked her way out of the situation. She never did go see a psychiatrist like she was supposed to.
Anyway, my father was angry with me because I had called the cops. My mother didn't speak to him for about three weeks. It was a very uncomfortable situation, and I was stuck in the middle of it.
He's expressed a lot of anger over my mother's irresponsibility with money, her rages, her instability, but he will never, ever do anything about it. He won't stand up to her. He just takes her abuse and does what she wants, then complains because nothing he does satisfies her. Although he's never been overtly cruel to me, he has always been very distant and unaffectionate. And since I've moved, he just sides with my mother on everything. My brother has even been shocked over how little support I get from him.
