the board as opposed to contact

[alone48]

I am sitting here thinking about N and wanting to wish him a Merry Christmas, instead it goes out to all of you on this board that have been there thru NC. Thank you and hope you have a blessed holiday.

[Certain Hope]

Oh dear (((((((AloneNoMore)))))))  I remember those days and feelings so well...

when I just had to keep reminding myself that I was never so truly alone as when npd-ex was at my side.
Some folks truly do brighten up a room (and a life!) by exiting it!!

Love to you and loads of Christmas Blessings that'll flow steadily into the coming New Year,
Carolyn

[SallyingForth]

Oh dear (((((((AloneNoMore)))))))  I remember those days and feelings so well...

when I just had to keep reminding myself that I was never so truly alone as when npd-ex was at my side.
Some folks truly do brighten up a room (and a life!) by exiting it!!

I like that one Carolyn ...

Some folks truly do brighten up a room (and a life!) by exiting it!!


I can agree with feeling more alone with my very N-FOO than by myself.

[lighter]

(((Alone)))  Stay strong and don't give your N the satisfaction of a phone call. 

You'll see that this stretch of alone time defines you, teaches you lessons about yourself..... shows you your metal.

Try to remember.... things will get better, though they don't feel OK now.

Stick with your NC plan, if that's what you've decided... and as my Italian BIL's father always told him.....

"Watch yourself, take it'ease.....and keep'a go."


Merry Chirstmas...... you have wise friends here who'll help you get through: )

[sea storm]

I agree with the others. Stay away from N. It is an illusion.
Keep walking toward the light and it isn't where the N lives.
It is not about N anyway. It is about not having one's needs met as a child and bonding with someone who can't really meet your needs.

I am sorry you feel this way. I know how it is. I feel that way too. I have yo-yoed about a Idozen times wanting to do the same thing.  And  I finally did sent an email. Luckily, it did not go through. I put in the wrong letters. Hmmmmm.

Much beter to let it out with safe peoplle, eh?

Love
Sea storm

[Ami]

Dear Alone,
  I am sorry to hear that you are hurting. I can tell how much you want(yearn) to call him. It is really, really hard. You did the right thing by reaching out, Alone. I hope that you are feeling a little better,now.        Love  Ami

((((((((((Alone))))))))))

[changing]

Hi Alone-

I am proud of how you have kept yourself intact and on terra firma despite the very human emotions that come through in waves, ready to sweep you away back into the rocks. You have done the hardest part- now comes the steady work, and the increasing rewards- peace, safety a sense of yourself as valuable and an individual worthy of respect and care. Renewed relationships with yourself and your goals, and reconnections with others that you have lost as casualties of the abuse you have been through. Merry Christmas Alone- your New Year is here!

We have all had moments such as you describe- it's a good sign really, as you are now entering a higher phase. (((((Alone)))))

Merry Christmas !!!!

Changing

[alone48]

First I want to thank all of you for your support and then I owe you a big apology. I hate myself at this moment as I did weaken and sent a text. Three months of nc wrecked. He has not answered and probably won't, but I'm sure he is having a good laught at my expense right now. You'd think I would learn. Sorry to all of you.

[changing]

Dearest Alone-

Please please please don't worry! You owe no one an apology. No one. So you sent the man a text- big deal!!!!

Don't fret my Dear- we have all , everyone, done this in one form or another!!!We support you in whatever you do. If Mr. N thinks anything about it, attaches some big significance to a text, so what- he's history, you are moving on !!!!! So you threw that loser a bone- big deal!!!!

You have wrecked nothing, there is no blood sister pact where you will be thrown out of the group , etc. for sending a text! Just relax Alone!!! I laugh at myself when I do things like that- and sometimes it makes my soon to be ex husband think that he is in control, puts him off balance so that when I  do put the whammy on him and shut him down, it is even more effective!

Alone, just chill out and enjoy the night!!!!! Have a Merry Christmas and don't be hard on yourself- just be hard on him!!!!! Alone, you are very strong and doing great!!!!!

Love and Happy Holidays From Your Friend,

Changing