Punched in the stomach

[Ami]

The N's don't have empathy. That is part of the definition of an N. I understand how hard it is to accept this about your own M. I am in the same boat ,Kelly.
         Love    Ami

[debkor]

Kelly,


It's so difficult to spend time around an N for large amounts of time.  I hear you Kelly.  It's alright and your last nerve gets frazzled by them. The store is your livelyhood and at the moment you just can't walk out on your income till another comes along.  Very difficult situation right now.

I know what you mean when you say (If you told her everything she wants to hear) praise her,tell her how wonderfull she is, blah, blah then maybe she will leave. 

Thats hard to do, eh!  When inside you want to say You made me miserable your a mean miserable person that sucks the life out of everyone around you and I'm sure you have.

But either way you do it (it gets you no where).

Your time will come. 

Hang in there Kell
Love
Deb

[hardtotrust]

But while she is filling her needs she is robbing me of mine.

That's one thing I read in the books that helped me understand how they choose to act. If there are many options to achieve the same result, they will always choose the one that hurts or causes damages to others (especially to the fragile ones, i.e., the ones who love them).

Hugs, Overcomer.

[teartracks]

Hi Kelly,

My heart goes out to you.  It's true, N's don't hear emotional appeals.  They just don't/can't.   The 'medium chill' has worked well for me in the past.  It's a question of redirecting or rerouting the energy you normally give to your mom.  A direction that doesn't frustrate and pull you down so thoroughly.  The medium chill and NC are strategies you don't have to use with non-N's and both actions leave you feeling less than because it's a kind of toughness that isn't called for with regular folk.  Practice, practice, practice.  

So sorry for how you're feeling and I am especially sorry for that motherless feeling that never goes away.  That motherless feeling in and of itself is a killer.  Add to that the business entanglement and it is a near impossible scenario.  I hope things level out for you.  It's a tough situation to be in.

tt

  

[Overcomer]

Well 4 Resumes out.  I have to keep my options open.  Only thing is two of the jobs are in the restaurant industry and they want 55 Hours per week and that seems steep but if the pay goes up maybe then it would seem ok.

[Ami]

Thinking of you, Kelly!!!! I am sending you good thoughts and peace.     Love   Ami