Dreams about the Narcissist

[Moonflower]

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[Anonymous]

Hi Moonflower,

Holy bat-crap.  You had to talk your mom into handing over a gun?        

Threats of suicide is more than N stuff.  It's one of the signs of Borderline PD.  I'm sorry I cannot remember from your other posts if you are already aware of this.  Suicide threats are the ultimate in emotional blackmail.

And Discounted Girl, I felt for your trauma for having to hear your mother threaten your father's life.  I am both proud and sorry that you were strong enough to want to take action to protect your father.  How brave!  

Both of these experiences are just incredibly traumatizing.  And yet it sounds like you both have hope of healing and getting through it all.  It's both mind boggling and inspiring.  Hugs to you both, Seeker

PS.  I think the Nness in the weaker partner is simple survival and safety needs.  They are so unsafe themselves, they cannot think about anyone else (which makes it seem N).  Sort of the flip side of the aggressive N monster who rages out of weakness to feel strong and to survive.  Just really primitive.

Seeker

[Discounted Girl]

Maybe your dad left the pistol with her thinking maybe she would follow thru & get everyone else out of their misery. Ohhhhhhhhhhh,,,  

Yeah the NQueen would call me in the middle of the night yelling, "get out here quick if you ever want to see me alive again. I've had it!"     So, single mother here, I would call the neighbor lady over to babysit in the middle of the night, I would drive the 25 miles out there, sometimes the roads were icy, and she would be there with her shotgun and in her nightgown, babbling on and on. My Dad was either in bed ignoring her, or sometimes he was working third shift. I never took drugs in my whole life, smoked pot now & then, but no heavy stuff. She was on valium like they were M&M's ,,, found a quack doctor who would give her anything she wanted. Ah, the agony -- where is the ecstasy? *cough*worthless pig*cough*.

[Discounted Girl]

Thanks Seeker,
I hope I am not painting a picture of a wimp girl here, hope I don't have to change my name ,,,,  

Well, no, I know I am strong. I have decided that not only does the Nparent have to have just the right ingredients to pull it off, but the victim also has just the right (should we say right?) substance to survive without going totally bonkers. Also, I think those who live in it and come out unscathed (or so it seems) either are in denial or don't have enough brain cells for it to matter anyhow.

[Moonflower]

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[Discounted Girl]

haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa !!!!!!!!!!!!! excuse me, I am crackin' up over the Eartha Kitt dream ...... would that be like my dream wherein Burt Reynolds was in love with me (back during Smokie & the Bandit) and he gave me a Rolex ...... jeeeez..

I only remember one dream she ever told me about and that was after her mother died and how she talked with her about the happiness in heaven. But the dream was more about her than about my grandmother, so it was an N dream, but maybe dreams can only be Nslanted. Seems like I have a lot about snakes, I wake up shaking. I don't ever remember speaking with her about my dreams either. I learned a long time ago to limit the deep sharing stuff, she would store it away and stab me in the back with it when least expected.

well, I never thought about the food angle. I can see how the NQueen would try something like that though and then feign innocence.

[Moonflower]

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[Discounted Girl]

Flower,
I was away from the board for several months and missed your postings on take-back gifts. I just read the whole thread. What a ripoff !!! What a bunch of cheats !!! It's a wonder she didn't have you evicted for being a squatter. Well, the NQueen is passing money all around to my brother and his kids and their kids and girlfriends (maybe some of them can get off welfare now). I haven't seen a dime. They never gave me any property or money or things of that nature, but she was fond of crocheting and knitting and quite accomplished at it. One time she gave me this king size crocheted rose colored bedspread, which was really wonderful and very lovely, except SHE DIDN'T FINISH IT !!!!!!!!!!!!! What am I gonna do with a half-finished crocheted bedspread ??? She just did it to frustrate me. I did not say anything about it, not because I didn't want to tick her off, but like so many other times, I did not want to give her the satisfaction of seeing me hurt, nor did I want to get into one of her Jerry Springer acts. I wish now I had just given the spread back to her or let her see me burn it out in the yard. She also gave me a nice white crocheted tablecloth, once again, it is not finished. She is a complete jerk and there is no way to figure these people out, but don't turn your backs.

[phoenix]

bye

[phoenix]

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[phoenix]

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[phoenix]

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[phoenix]

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[Discounted Girl]

Hello Steel, errr, I mean Flower,

I am thinking your grandmother may been an N and your mother became an N because of her, so they had an Nbattle. Who knows .....

Oh, that would have been a hoot, to have Christmas guests over and invite them all in to see the lovely bedspread my sweet mommy made for her sweet little daughter. hahhahahha,, they would say ,, hey, you blind??? that thing is missing something !!!

The snakes -- well, I always heard that's about penises -- hahahah ...

You know, I just was thinking about something that makes me laugh. I once saw 2 roosters jump on her, on her back and head all over her, mad as hell. If 2 roosters jumped on me I would be screaming and running and crying and batting them. She was furious and turned and tried to kill them with her bare hands. Dogs, roosters and little kids never liked her    I saw that right away as a child. I remember the little boy next door used to look at her through the fence and call her a "grouch." She was also rather like the grinch at Christmas, getting mad if we were shaking our presents and snooping around. One time I found a book under the seat of the car (that's how little I was, I was down on the floor in the back seat) -- I pulled it out from under her seat and she went berzerk. It was some Christmas gift she had hidden under there. I am not 100% sure, but I think it was a Bible Story Book of the Christmas Story -- ain't that a contradiction? I don't even wnat to go there.

[Anonymous]

One time she gave me this king size crocheted rose colored bedspread, which was really wonderful and very lovely, except SHE DIDN'T FINISH IT !!!!!!!!!!!!! What am I gonna do with a half-finished crocheted bedspread ??? She just did it to frustrate me.

This is very wierd. My analysis of her:

...She lacked the attention span to finish it. She gave it to you anyway and wanted full credit. This is like a 4 year old giving her mommy some messy artwork and wanting a lot of praise.

...Half-finished is like her internal world. Her mind isn't all there but she is in denial about that, and doesn't notice a half-finished bedspread.

I would have been tempted to say, 'Um, this is lovely. Is this the whole thing?'  

And I would have thrown it in the nearest dumpster.

bunny