The stranger down my street---

[Izzy_*now*]

Yes deb,

This is a very pretty town/city (over 100,000) where businesses as well as private homes, apt. building and streets are filled with flowers. We have flowering trees and other trees all over as well.

The 2 pictures are the same little boy and this is him when he came to see me.

[Certain Hope]

Okay, Izzy,

I just wondered because people who appeared maybe too needy, for instance, used to seem a bit annoying to me... often due to my own misperception combined with a fear of being needy/lonely/helpless/whatever.

Your location is very pretty! That sculpture of the sails is unique, and the gardens... thanks for sharing!

Carolyn

[debkor]

Iz,

He is very good looking.  Does he resemble you?  Looks like he could have your smile.  I think you should email him.  My ex SIL had contacted me two years ago and asked if my children still remember her? She called because my children's Gm, her M was dying and wanted to let them know.  They were not home at the time.  But they always had memories and kept them going.  She was a good person but things just happened and we fell out of touch. 

I gave her my children's cell # and told her to feel free to call.  My children were excited and welcomed it but she never called.

Maybe you should take the chance and contact Iz,  What do you think?

Maybe he needs for you to make the first move.  I don't know.

I think my kids really want the contact but are afraid to call in case of rejection.  I think my SIL feels that way too.

And there is stands.

Love
Deb

[Izzy_*now*]

hi deb

"It's so interesting, Hops, your suggestion of emailing KC, as I had that thought in mind as I listened to the interview on the radio -him, his mother, his father, all spliced as one report.

I felt then that I had some things I wanted to share with him, about us, maybe about my life, my broken leg whatever. I'll know when I get started.

He will be 22 on Oct 3."

This is on my cry thread down below. The conversations are rather split.

Yes I have emailed him about twice before, but I thought him somewhat immature to answer.

Now I already have one started; some things are facts he knows but I'd like to say something about feelings-- like mine being lost and the crying beginning again---but have to think on that  for a 21 year old grandson.

I want it to be real too, not forced.

Love
Izzy

[debkor]

Iz,

I know 21 is hard and I would have to think about it also. There is not much more I can offer because of  his age 21 but I think it is a good age.  Not too young and I think he may be able to handle it, embrace things, gotta give him the chance. 

I think, err 21 yrs, I think.  I'm working with that age myself then 23 then 13. OH God! 


Love
Deb

[lighter]

Izzy.... I'd write everything down I felt like saying in that e mail....

whirlwind style....

for myself.

Then I'd go back, with my Grandson in mind, and re read.

Once.

Re write.

Readtwice.

Re write.

Read again.

Re write.

Then I'd ask a few somebodies here what they thought and go from there.

Letters are my very favorite form of communication... and sometimes we don't even send them, after all. 

You can put things down just the way you want them to be read.... no emotionally charged inflections or imperfect words.

People can re visit them over and over, when sad, calm, upset.... and that's a good thing, IMO.

Lighter

[Hopalong]

Hey Izz,
I think what would mean most is just to write and write and write a ton of little anecdotes, stories, moments, afternoons, rituals, funny times, that you spent with him when he was little. Not just about your feelings, but about his early life.

I think it means so much to people his age to realize that someone else holds their early childhood vividly, and that it had meaning and is precious to someone.

Even if you don't say much, or only a little, about your loss of him and your feelings right away, those stories? Those stories will tell him...

love,
Hops

[Certain Hope]

Hey Izz,
I think what would mean most is just to write and write and write a ton of little anecdotes, stories, moments, afternoons, rituals, funny times, that you spent with him when he was little. Not just about your feelings, but about his early life.

I think it means so much to people his age to realize that someone else holds their early childhood vividly, and that it had meaning and is precious to someone.

Even if you don't say much, or only a little, about your loss of him and your feelings right away, those stories? Those stories will tell him...

love,
Hops

I agree...with all of the above! I always loved my Grandma's stories... even the one about how she tried to feed me spinach when I was a baby, regardless of the fact that the green stuff was coming back out faster than she could shovel it in... lol. And compliment him about something simple. One of my sweetest memories of Grandma was when I was a young mother and she commented on what a pleasant, cozy home I'd made... and how much she liked my flower-beds, in that I'd made an "old-fashioned garden".  That made me glow!

Carolyn