The questions asked in this post do not have definitve answers. Just needed to talk this morning. My way of getting a hug. Got back lately from a family wedding.
Now, I am not a diagnostitian, but my x fits all nine of the N criteria in his past behavior. Also, he has Viet Nam flashbacks, as well as is depressed for 18 months and hyper-manic for 18 months. He has a history of mis-management of other people's money. He won't get help, for he sees himself as having no problems but everyone else has problems instead. He is a loaded cannon waiting explosion. It will be "other" directed if it happens. And who knows if it will? Anger intensifies though.
He remarried 2 weeks right after the divorce to a woman with my name who actually testified she was after his money (he was stealing mine for he has none other than land) and he was giving out my address as her new one, calls her the same pet names he called me, etc. Boy! I left town, severed all contact legally and emotionally, as best as I can.
My question is: Sam V says a person cannot be both Bi polar and N. But, it seems to me he was. I don't care at this point except that he is the father of my children and I would truly like to understand if they contact me about it. I forsee problems for them although at this point he feels they are "on his side." I simply want to help if they need me, but not invade. Other than that, I am far away and will remain so. I do not give them my concerns in any way for it is not appropriate in its timing.
I saw him at the family wedding of daughter lately. Did not know him as he is acting so differently. He met his match with his new wife and is COMPLETELY SUBMISSIVE! Can a N of his character be truly controlled by another N who is stronger?
I don't understand this and it is sending red flags of warning. He was so manipulative to me! He is very depressed, she is literally leading him by the arm like he is non functioning. Now, my concern is that when he "switches" back to manic and feels trapped, where the explosion will be directed.
I cannot live in fear of this man nor will I. Actually, I feel quite safe and protected for some reason. It is hard though, for I think of my adult children. You cannot protect people forever, and sometimes not at all. And I ask myself, what good will worry do? No one would believe me anyhow, for it is only a gut feeling I have. Best to stay positive. At least I don't have to ever see him again now that the last child is married.
Boy, this life is full of puzzling situations. Sometimes, I simply just wish to understand.
