It Is Not Okay

[lollie]

Why is it okay to label a member of the board with BPD or NPD? Why is okay to slap someone with the label of sociopath and psychopath? And why the rush to smooth everything over, remain neutral, or tell Leah that she has “stuff to look at and get over” simply because she was hurt and offended by another board member’s attack? This is not simply the sting of being called a “drama queen,” as bean mentioned in another thread. This is one layperson person slapping a psychiatric diagnosis on another. This is one board member accusing another board member of not having a heart or conscience, basically labeling them with the granddaddy of all psychiatric disorders.

It is not okay. Period. End of story.

The majority of people posing to this board have been wounded, for the most part, by someone in their lives who have a personality disorder. I would think that at least some people would understand how awful it would feel to be accused of having the same disorder as the ones who have hurt them most. Or being labeled period.

I am not posting this to add to any current conflict going on right now. I just think it’s something that needed to be said plainly.

[seasons]

lollie,

Thank you for expressing yourself in such a strait forward manner.

I agree with you, your words were helpful and a comfort on a very sad day.


thank you,
love seasons

[lighter]

Those posts were removed, I believe.


Lighter

[Leah]

Only just now,  Lighter

[seasons]

((Leah)),

Thinking of you with love, may God be with you and comfort you today and always.

love seasons

[Leah]

Dear Lollie,

Grateful for your strength, courage and boldness, of which, is a clear testimony of your character.


And I thank you for precious validation.

"God Bless You"


Love, Leah

[Leah]

Dear Seasons,

Thank you so very much.


"God Bless You"


Love, Leah

[Ami]

((((((((Lollie, Seasons, Leah)))))))))))))         Love   Ami

[ann3]

Right On, Lollie!!

I admire and appreciate your integrity & courage for saying this.

I, too, wanted to express the same feelings, but based on past experience, I anticipated that the nasty ones would rally the gang and launch into attack mode, thereby perpetuating the animosity.  It becomes an endless cycle of attack, defend, attack, defend, attack, defend, ad infinitum.  It's a childish, negative cycle and is certainly not what  I want to find on this board.

I think Leah has been treated abominably and has been targeted by those who seek to expel their bile upon her.  Of course she feels hurt, who wouldn't?

Leah is a person of integrity who has been poorly and wrongfully treated. 

I am not posting this to add to any current conflict going on right now. I just think it’s something that needed to be said plainly.  Ditto

ann

[gratitude28]

Lollie,
Thanks for being plain and honest. I am sure I couldstick a bunch of labels to myself, and I would be mostly correct But I sure would feel hurt to have someone diagnose me. It is especially wounding when we are trying to get better and cannot understand why we have been called such a thing (for those with N parents, you know what it feels like to be labeled and try to figre out what you did to earn it).
(((((((((((((((((((everyone)))))))))))))))))
I hope the focus can stay on helping.
Love,Beth

[lighter]

 I anticipated that the nasty ones would rally the gang and launch into attack mode, thereby perpetuating the animosity.  It becomes an endless cycle of attack, defend, attack, defend, attack, defend, ad infinitum.  It's a childish, negative cycle nd is certainly not what  I want to find on this board.

I am not posting this to add to any current conflict going on right now.  Ditto

ann

  

Really?

Not posting to add to current conflict?

I've seen you do it at least 3 times, recently.

If you don't wish to find negative behavior on the board, then don't post negativley on the board.

That's my suggestion to you.

Now....

in the spirit of posting only with those who lift me up....

I'm moved to draw a boundary with you.


Please refrain from posting to me in the future.

I'm forwarding my request with Dr. G.

Thanks,

Lighter

[Ami]

Right On, Lollie!!

I admire and appreciate your integrity & courage for saying this.

I, too, wanted to express the same feelings, but based on past experience, I anticipated that the nasty ones would rally the gang and launch into attack mode, thereby perpetuating the animosity.  It becomes an endless cycle of attack, defend, attack, defend, attack, defend, ad infinitum.  It's a childish, negative cycle and is certainly not what  I want to find on this board.

I think Leah has been treated abominably and has been targeted by those who seek to expel their bile upon her.  Of course she feels hurt, who wouldn't?

Leah is a person of integrity who has been poorly and wrongfully treated. 

I am not posting this to add to any current conflict going on right now. I just think it’s something that needed to be said plainly.  Ditto

ann

YES, Ann! It is hard to let those you care about be hurt---hard, hard ,hard! Oh Lord, give me the strength!I really don't care for myself, any more,but I care when others I care about get hurt. Just consider yourself important, smart, saavy, witty enough to BE attacked. That is my POV, for what it is worth.   Love,       Ami

((((((((Ann)))))))))))

[changing]

If I might add- anyone who might be tempted to taunt , silence, or send me packing with silly sophomoric allusions to their fantasies by inserting "lighter" and "Finding Peace" in superficially friendly posts to me- "It Is Not Okay".

Best Wishes For Greater Heart and Harmony,

Changing

[Ami]

Dear Ann
 I see another of my lessons.  I feel very depressed when behavior is "crazy" around me and *I* am told it is NOT happening. I feel very depressed right now, sadness pouring on me b/c up is down and down is up, JUST like with my M.I KNEW what was right, good, beautiful, valuable, but my world  told me that what was UGLY  and tawdry was beautiful. NOOO, I see why Bill stood up for me. He loved me and could not see me hurt. I love Ann and could not see her hurt. Life has meaning if I can SEE wrong, evil , the dark side. That is what she stole, the ability to see EVIL. I can see it ,now. There IS a right and wrong. My M screamed ,'There IS no right or wrong",but there is.Yes,  there is.  *I* can see evil and still stand. That is what I could not do, as a child.
         Ami

[Oops]

Lollie,

THANK YOU!


Oops