I just want to scream. Instead I'm doing all of the piddly clean up work around my office that I"ve been putting off.
H and I went to my parents' house for July 4th and we had a decent time. It was very stressful, but not horrible. The next weekend more family was coming in and M and I went out to visit with them. NM was not on her best behavior then. After we went out July 4th NM called and wanted to take M shopping and to lunch. I told her I didn't know what his schedule was like and we'd see. I finally decided he could go, but either H or I had to go with him. NM did not like this when I told her, and demanded to know what I was hiding. I told her I wasn't hiding anything, but that I didn't think M needed to be pumped for information. She told me that she doesn't pump him for information, that he volunteers. That's true to a point. He'll volunteer things occasionally, but she spends a lot of times asking things like, "Is H nice to you?"
"What kind of chores do you have to do?"
"Why were you grounded?"
Things that are none of her business. She wanted to know all about M's medication, also none of her business. It was decision his doctor and I made. NM disagrees with giving him the medication even though it helps him focus and concentrate, and M will tell you that it helps him. She's gone on and on about the evils of his medication. Last night she called M and told him all about taking him shopping and going to lunch.
Then today, she calls and demands to know why I won't let her take him alone, and I told her I didn't want him pumped for information. She got mad and told me she doesn't know H, and that when we did go out to visit that H and I were so busy talking to my SIL that she didn't get to talk to either of us. NM made no effort to talk to either one of us. She didn't appreciate being thrown together with a stranger, and that H and I needed to spend some time visiting before she made that step. I told her if she didn't want to go with H, then she should pick a day that I could go, maybe on a weekend. She informed me that weekends didn't work for her and she only had a short time during the week because she can't walk and everything she eats makes her sick. SHe told me she would call M later and explain why she couldn't take him out tomorrow. Then she informed me that my whole family thinks there's something wrong with M, and that she didn't know what I was hiding, but I might as well tell her. I'm not hiding anything from her. She's just assuming.
So now, I'm going to have a disappointed 11 year old, who's grandmother is probably going to tell him what an horrible witch I am because I won't let his grandmother take him out shopping by herself. Just this weekend though, he told H and I that his grandmother always pulled his hair when she was mad at him or when he wasn't paying attention, and he is so scared of making her mad that he literally makes himself sick. H and I have managed to undo some of what my NM has done to him. We've got him trying new things. We even started teaching him to ride a bike last night. he's been convinced he couldn't for years. My NM was always telling him he could never do things. There's so many positive changes, but my NM is upset because there's something wrong with him.
I'm going to call my brother and find out just what he thinks is wrong with M, and I'm going to tell him that I"m done. I'm not going to play games anymore. I'm not going to let NM sink her claws in M and destroy what H and I have managed to do. M can at least have some semblance of normalcy. I never had that.
