Frankly, after being in this forum, then reading on that forum, I find they are still "blaming Mom' without trying to understand that generations happened before Mom. They can stop that with No Contact.
It almost sounds like a contest as to who was hurt the most by a Mom!
I'm not for the N behaviour that puts us all in a quandry, and that sometimes takes us a while to figure out, but once we know, then we take action. We go NC and that is that!
NC has helped me SO much with parents, siblings, my daughter's ex, the N I met '98 -'02 and recently realizing my ex boss was a control freak, at the very least.
I am such an N magnet, or have seen so many, that my NC has left me without a really good friend in 3-D who understands.
I am winging on my own and I prefer my own company to the Ns of this world. I have workmates and e-buddys and I watch very carefully that I never attract another N.
I read a lot, work, and watch movies and have learned to live alone and like it, in comparison to invitiing just anyone into my life, just for company. Sometimes I feel a bit lonely, but that is far better than listening to N garbage!
Today I called a guy I went to school with 55 years ago. He saw my brother at a funeral back east, last May, and Ian asked about me, as he always thought I was hot stuff...when he was 13 and I was 15. Now we are 67 and 69 and he has been married for 47 years, 4 girls and 11 grandchildren.
We talked for over 2 hours and it was just great.... just the kind of interaction from another nice person and talking about all the people in common that we know. It was great. Really great! I envy his wife!
Izzy
