Kus,
If you need to keep telling the story in order to keep understanding, seeing and get out the stess that was triggered then please feel safe enough. Because of my fears of sounding like a broken record, I've held back in the past, it has cost me healing. Keep telling the story. I had to tell my stories of trauma over and over again to see, cry and let go.
Your pain around the psychiatrist is very real, the therapy triggered some very real pain for you. PTSD is so hard, yours is real. Hops is right, you did a wonderful job, a lot of work, in writing this all out.
It is hard for you and anyone here to say what was really going on with the psychiatrist, from what you wrote, it is clear that he did bring some of his own stuff into the process and did make some mistakes, mistakes which hurt you as well as triggered your FOO memories. What must be so painful for you is to have the FOO stuff brought up by him and then for you to be left alone, or abandoned in the pain of the process of all of your memories. That is a trauma in itself. It is as if you allowed yourself to be broken, finally, fully just broken, and, then, you were denied and invalidated for being the broken child you were.
"I could go on and on-but should stop. I've had PTSD symptoms since then. Major chest mains, his objectfying me renumerating through my head, ignoring my friends, unable to do important stuff, uncontrollable crying-and in public, not answering my phone, got a 25% on an exam and failed that class which as implications for my entire future, couldn't get myself to study-could not focus, could not concentrate---grades were As and Bs before this...I've got in 2 car accidents in one week."
You have been going through so much...so much.
Hugs,
Lise