Shame

[Ami]

I think most of our problems are we think we are "bad"(ie shame). We have to hide it from ourselves ,first and then from others. We have all these elaborate distortions so we don't have to face it.
 I am thinking this is the root  of the damage we have from N parents. 
 Does that seem right ?         Ami           

[Izzy_*now*]

Hi Ami

Did you ever Google some of your questions?

Here's one on Shame-based living, and there are many more....

http://www.angeresources.com/shamerage.htm

Izzy

[Ami]

Yes ,Izzy ,I have read articles on things. I have always relied on my intellect as a way  to deal with life so I really don't need more info as much as a heart understanding. KWIM?             Ami

[Izzy_*now*]

If that is for me Ami, I would appreciate being addressed. Izzy

Do you really want to listen to all the broken people here as opposed to reading articles, then raising a discussion for some back and forth?

If that was for me, you cut me off at the knees! "Shame on you!", as my mother always said, when any of her children boo-booed!

Izzy

[Ami]

Yes ,Izzy,I want to listen to all the broken people here and want my own broken self to talk ,too.          Ami

[Gabben]

Hi Ami,

I understand the shame and pain of shame so well. Then, when we are  not accepted, just as we are, in our wounds and dysfunction, we feel even more ashamed. It can be a vicious cycle. I know that I feel very fragile when I am in that place of shame and feeling broken, it is as if I need to be around compassionate people who will accept me exactly how I am and not try to fix me which at times sends, especially when we are in our old wounds of memories, sends us a message that we are not OK and that our pain is not OK.

[cantors.counter]

Ami, I have no idea whether it's the root or not, but I do know that shame, thinking I'm bad, is certainly a big part of it. It seems I had another thought, but I've lost it for now -- a common occurance for me. Hopefully it'll come back sometime. *eyeroll*

[Ami]

Dear Lise and Cantorscounter,
 Today when I was out forcing myself to get social, I had a sense of BAD,BAD and that my interactions in life were all a relationship with BAD and not other people or even myself.
 It was BAD, BAD that I had to face. It helped to see but is so painful to face all these things        Ami