Hi all,
I am just feeling a bit down in the dumps and want to get it off my chest; I'm sorry! As some of you know, my mum has been making malicious allegations about me for years about my little boy. I am getting our records through covering the last eight years and there are literally hundreds of pages of information. Every time something unpleasant has been written about us it has come from my mum but it's only me that knows it's her; the allegations have, for the most part, been made anonymously and I only know it's her because of the content of what's been said (hard to describe without writing pages but you know there are phrases that only your mum uses? And there are some things so outlandish and unlikely that they are clearly fabricated and can't simply be a misunderstanding of some sort). Because of the Data Protection Laws in the UK, I am not allowed to see anything in my records unless the author of them has given their consent. So things like being able to prove it's her because of her handwriting, for example, are out because I can't see the original letter. It's all very complicated because lots of different things have gone on and now I have this latest referral to the education welfare people to deal with as well.
I've been doing some research and it seems the only way I can get anything done is to take each case to court. This means I will be looking at launching between three and six legal cases next year, assuming I can get together enough evidence for each of them to get a solicitor interested. It will mean a huge amount of preparation and paperwork because I can only prove the allegations are false by cross referencing sometimes dozens of different files to show that her claims were unsubstantiated and contradictory. I have already been fighting for nearly three years to get something done through the complaints and adjudication bodies and it has cost me around £1500 in stationary, printing, photocoyping, postage and so on. I can see it getting a lot worse before it gets any better and I am aware that I might do a lot of work and not actually get anywhere with it.
I just feel down that there is no protection from the system? I feel that what she did is just as bad as physically assaulting me but the law seems to work in her favour because she can make allegations again and again and there's nothing anyone can do to stop her. I'm also so disappointed that the police did so little and feel like they didn't take me seriously or believe what I was saying. My step-dad stopped my nephew in the street last week and physically threatened him - he's only seventeen. My mum has sent a card to my son anonymously, so I can't prove it was her but I know it was because no-one else I know is mad enough to behave like that - the whole point of sending a card is signing your name on it, after all! I also feel resigned to having this hanging over me until either my son is eighteen (another ten years) or my mum is dead. It feels like I'm the one being punished and just feels so unfair.
Anyways, I know there's nothing anyone can do, just wanted to get it out of my system with people I know understand! Thanks for reading xx