Voicelessness and Emotional Survival > Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board
The "Mama Never Told Me" Thread
debkor:
TT,
I never thought of adding on feet. Thanks!! That would also work with putting my plants on them (stand). Another thing I had done was to buy material (cheap) from walmart in really pretty designs I took two (long strips) and drapped them from one end of ceiling to other over my dining room table. Ceiling decor. I had many compliments. It's so easy. All I did was (pin) the ends in the corner of ceililng and let it drape (a bit). You can also use the same material to make (quick) chair cover to match. That I use the hot glue to fold (seams). I think it cost me 20$ at the most for everything.
Deb
Hopalong:
https://www.google.com/#sclient=psy-ab&hl=en&source=hp&q=how+to+cover+an+old+lampshade&pbx=1&oq=how+to+cover+an+old+lampshade&aq=f&aqi=g1&aql=&gs_sm=e&gs_upl=1879l7525l0l7930l31l20l1l9l10l4l440l3961l0.13.6.0.1l29l0&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.,cf.osb&fp=a805222ab1a5b016&biw=1050&bih=560
dunno if any of these cover flame retardancy, but one mentions a sheet of polypropelene as a base for the fabric...
xo
Hops
Redhead Erin:
Boat, the cleaning kung-foo is the perfect explanation--Guess I just dont have it! :lol: And PR (I think it was you) I will definitely start vacuuming after I mop--Thanks for permission to do that. I thought there was a rule that the mop had to get all the dirt by itself.
Now flirting. . . there is a great book called Superflirt by Tracy Cox. It was recommended to me my another exotic dancer, and a whole bunch of us on a message board read it and had good results. You can also try this woman's web site http://www.lowndes.com/howtotalk3.php.
I cant find who wrote about flirting at the grocery store, but its important to remember, most people are not looking at you. They have their heads too far in the clouds worrying about their own business to go minding yours.
Flirting is a skill you can learn. It involves reading body language and using body language, more than words, to respond. the neat thing about it is, while you are learning, nobody will notice if you get it wrong. When I started dancing, I had no idea about how to flirt. I had to learn everything. Now it is second nature.
Here is an easy technique called "Mirroring and matching." Pretend you are a mirror of the person you are flirting with. Every time he makes a large movement, wait three seconds and make a similar movement. For example, he takes a sip of his drink, count 1...2...3...sip your drink. He scratched his ear ...1..2...3...push some hair behind you ear. You can do this for quite a log time. When you feel like you are getting into a rhythem, you cAN
reverse the process. Sip your drink (or whatever) first, and see if he follows you.
How this works, it establishes a sort of sympathy between two people. It puts you in a space of having something in common and creates a friendly atmosphere in which you can then get into a good conversation.
Another easy thing to do is, make lots of skin and eye contact. When you shake hands with somebody, hold on a second or two longer than necessary, make eye contact, and smile. When sitting in conversation, touch his hand or arm (Skin, not his sleeve) gently when making a point. REst your chin lightly on your hand, open your eyes wide, look in his eyes, and nod in agreement with things he says. You will give him the impression you are truly fascinated.
Remember, flirting is just flirting. Its just for fun. It doesn't mean anything. You can have fun flirting with someone and never have to see him again. It certainly doesnt mean you are going to end up in bed with him (which is what I used to think.)
Also, flirting does not mean being stupidly hyper-slutty. Good flirting (IMO) is very subtle. When you find your own style, you will naturally find other people who match your style. Men who like that slutty-erotic style will not be interested in your subtle flirtations, and will look elsewhere. Men who like a classier type of woman will be turned off by the over-the-top nastiness.
Hopalong:
HOO boy.
This really makes me sound like a concert organ, in terms of my inner-feminazi button pushing.
But I defer to those who are experienced in the art!
This topic was on a TV show I saw yesterday...people were demonstrating a look and a type of walk that would help one flirt in the grocery store.
I've always wished I could simply say, "You seem like a nice person. If you're single, would you like to have coffee?"
I lack the courage.
Hops
sKePTiKal:
Hops, I too like that direct approach - and since I tend to form (real) friendships with men (not just romantic relationships) I've found guys sorta like this. They too can be confused about this stuff! Like Erin says - it doesn't mean anything other than what it means... let's have coffee and chat.
Where things get dicey, though... is when flirting or simple friendly gestures are misunderstood as an invitation to a whole lot more than that. You know how I say: trust in god but tie your camel?
Maybe "be willing to ask, but here are my boundaries" would work here?
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