bit blooo today

[Hopalong]

Got 'em, (((((((((((Sela))))))))))))))).

And pots of gold and big strong hugs back at you, too.

love and thanks,
Hops

[debkor]

Hey hops,

Well of course you are a bit blooo today and that's OK. You go ahead and feel what you are feeling. I think you are right the peace in the house has allowed you to hear your feelings.  You have went off ON/mode.  I use to get like that with my mom too when she was in the hospital.  You get to slow down briefly and feel.  It's very draining taking care of an elderly person yet alone maintaining your own life.   My mom lived with me and my sister took care of my moms paper work, the hospitals, the bills and everything that I couldn't.  There would not have been enough hours in the day for me to do it all.  We split the care involved so I don't know how you do it all Hops. 

It's not easy.

Your a good person Hops. 


Deb

[Ami]

Dear   Hops,
  I am learning that I must honor my feelings. If not, I will get sick in some way. I am trying to do this. Isense that you feel guilty about your feelings to your Mom(maybe I am wrong).I feel guilty about every glimpse of an unacceptable feeling
We could give ourselves such huge gifts by accepting our feeling -good and bad. My heart goes out to you. Thank you for all the kindness that you give me                     Love  Ami

[Overcomer]

Hops:  I am with you.  My mom is out of town and it is wonderful not having her at work.  even the employees have commented on how peaceful it is without her there.  Cannot imaging in a million years how it would be to live with her.

[Ami]

I am not at all minimizing how horrible it would be to live with herI think that I would havedied by now if I was living with her.                                                                                                                                   . I am just adding a thought. I have not lived with mine for over 30 years. I might as well b/c she is still in my head.
 She trained me so well as far as her crazy N thinking that I am a prisoner of her WHEREVER I go.
  Of course , living with her would be beyond hell.
   I have been so brainwashed with self doubt, hatred and lack of trust in myself that she did her job well. She made the perfect person who she could get all her bad feelings about herself "off" on. She created the perfect garbage pail. Then I married an H and continued my "job" as garbage pail'
   HOWEVER, this garbage pail SAW reality yesterday and there are going to be two VERY unhappy people in my life--- my mother and my husband, They have no idea that this garbage pail is getting strength                                    Love   Ami

[Hopalong]

Hey all,
I'm okay, truly. Bit bloooo was all, and now I'd say...azure. Brightening up.

Can't really do vacation, CB ($$) but I WILL have the time off work. I may do little
day trips or a weekend at a friend's. Most of all, I'll enjoy the peace and quiet.

Thanks everyone. I do think there's a lot of truth to feelings rising up when you
are relaxed or safe enough to feel them. Since that makes such good sense,
I'm finding it easier to just see them come up and not fixate.

Two nights in a row I've come home, gone out on the terrace with a cold
brew and a happy dog, and just rocked, looking at the treetops in the yard.
Did a church project until the lightning bugs came out. Listened to a baseball
game on the radio just because the sound was so homey, old-timey.

I am very easy to amuse with simple pleasures. It's nice!

hugs
Hops

[lighter]

So glad to hear you're living in the moment and enjoying the little things.  I believe you do feel better.

So glad (((Hops))))

I also think that dreading your mother return is a pretty logical thought process. 

It's sort of like getting a cancer dx then living in fear of dying.  You end up dying a little every day instead of living your life until you die. Yikes. 

Ahhh... I know that's hard to follow.  Sorry, it's my best right now. 

[lighter]

CB... ::clapping and celebrating the power of speaking our truth and talking about problems::

Improbable, but I'm sure you did start sleeping better after you posted here about trouble sleeping.

 The mind and body are connected. 

Being validated is like a deep sigh of relief for the soul. 

Feeling heard and understood is balm for our confused mental selves.

 Eek, lol.  That was deep, lol. 

[Ami]

When you validated me about my mother,my stomach aches went away and my eyesight is getting better.                                                                        Love   Ami     

[Hopalong]

Makes sense to me, CB! 

Validation for everybody!

xo
Hops

[JanetLG]

Validation is a wonderfaul thing! How many of us have tried for YEARS and not been heard, even by 'friends' who keep saying 'it CAN'T be THAT bad, surely?'

Hops, your business idea sounds very promising. Combining the internet with a niche product is a great idea, IMO 

I'm sure it will work out for you.

Janet