Hi y'all,
I've had a valuable pause to contemplate my Board life here. What with spring, people trying to roar back into life like freed zoo animals after caging, I'm not surprised most of us have gone quiet. Or gone outside!
The hiatus has also allowed me to think about several things that personally impact me about this place, where I've healed and learned SO much over the years:
1) Dependency that startled me. When Tupp went away for her own good reasons, I grieved. Partly because I miss Tupp -- her remarkable narratives/writing, her kindness, bravery, and regular engagement. The other part (less recognized by me of course) was how much I'd knit daily Board dialogue into my sense of safety. And purpose. Y'all have truly filled a void in my life, and have been my first and only online "phamily." Additionally, my own yearning to support and make a difference to a young woman not that much older than my D, probably needs little explanation. Likewise, things I've learned from each of you are uncountable. Sister teachers.
2) A desire to be positive and productive if the Board changes or ends, and not be shaken to the core by it. If it's a new "release the outcome" lesson then I can learn it and will be always grateful.
Anyway, the recent quiet here as everyone goes about their own meaningful business, has helped me wake up to my need to create more meaningful business in my 3D. I can do it. I'm reaching out for more connection and new activities (I've just been dubbed VP of the board for a local effort to start the Village concept here.)
That doesn't mean I want to give up on this precious place. I don't! I'll be hanging onto its ankles when Doc G gently makes a change one day.
Meanwhile, I ask a favor. Simply to help me wean myself more sturdily of going to the bookmark a couple times a day, would anyone be willing when you/they come back to post for your own timing/reasons (we might need each other more in winter)...to PM me: There's talk again on VESMB!
That would help me loosen my bony clutch to a more comfortable grip. Thanks if you do, and if you don't, not to worry. I'll check in anyway now and then. Couldn't NOT!
Love to all of you,
Hops
PS Given covid's new rise (2 friends are down) and this article:
https://www.washingtonpost.com/health/2022/05/28/covid-memorial-day-surge/-- I've been trying to think of life going forward as having two seasons:
--About six months of gentle or not-worse-than-firepit weather reframed as Visit Season, when I can see friends and have safe visits, and soak that into my bones
--Another six months mostly indoors alone, which I can reframe as Contemplative Season. A time to reflect, read, write, and work on caring for and enjoying home.