Gosh, I feel so bad for those of you (so many) who grew up without the BIG DAY each year. Chutzpah, I am happy you have some (chutzpah)! Good for you!
My parents had nine kids, but our birthdays were done up big time. WE were the star (which is tough with so many kids around).
When I "grew up" I was surprised and always dissapointed at birthday time. My (both) exN husbands had NO clue how to make a birthday special for someone. I was usually angry and hurt all day. My kid's dad would usually buy me extravagant presents (to smokescreen affairs, I later found out) but then treat me so badly, I would cry all day.
My second husband just didn't care at all. Not at all...we'd go get a drink (for him, really) or maybe to dinner, but mostly last minute.
Now I am the one who reminds my children. ... I make sure they have a way to purchase or make me presents. At first it felt weird, but they felt sooo bad when they would realize they had nothing for me. It's a single parenting strategy... one of many to keep the home happy.
And, of course, I am the one who helps them remember their idiot dad's birthday and helps them get him a present....(not his current wife, imagine!) I do this not to make him feel good, but to make them feel good.
