Author Topic: one night stands (Read 15120 times)

Anonymous · « **Reply #30 on:** June 22, 2005, 09:07:46 PM »

Hello girls and boys - well, this thread has opened up a whole other side of you all. Firstly I would like to ask 'Write' if she has moved any closer to her wish to occasionally have an intimate encounter. Any PM's coming in?
For my part, I would like to report that my 'post' in reply to Write has resulted in 15 PM's, two marriage proposals, three registered mail items and a large parcel wrapped in a plain brown wrapper delivered via messenger . My Voice mail box is over flowing and my email box is being hammered by someone called"Formerly Bruce" . If I do not post for a while you will hopefully understand that I am kind of busy.

John. ( Gee,I love this forum)

Stormchild · « **Reply #31 on:** June 22, 2005, 09:09:22 PM »

Hi Write

I don't want to be a wet blanket with all the fun & games, but I've been checking this thread off & on today at work - I can't post from there, they'd take my head off, or I certainly would have - and I haven't yet seen anyone mention what I guess I'm going to have to.

Heightened sexual interest can be a harbinger of impending manic episodes.

How are you feeling otherwise? Got both feet on the ground, etc.?

I don't want to ruin semi-innocent funnin' around

-- it's just that somebody needs to make sure this possibility isn't overlooked. So I'm mentioning it.

Carry on, dearies.

Brigid · « **Reply #32 on:** June 22, 2005, 09:11:47 PM »

Well, I guess some of us are just more popular than others. Gee John, how'd you get so lucky??

I guess I need to fine tune my technique.

Brigid

Anonymous · « **Reply #33 on:** June 22, 2005, 09:59:28 PM »

Dear John:

............................................................................................
...........................................................................................

etc.

GFN

PS:

jophil · « **Reply #34 on:** June 22, 2005, 10:45:08 PM »

Hi Girls, the post above from 'Guest' sighed 'John' is mine - I just forgot to logon.
The issue of social sucess and popularity is particularly significant for me as an adult child of N parents. I was painfully introverted as a child and never sought out the 'in'crowd in high school . I was socially withdrawn because my self image was in fragments thanks to my family system which resembled a psychological Auswitz.
I have tried numerous devices and ploys to get 'a big game' but never really succeeded until I took up Ballroom Dance and, more importantly I transformed my pain into a kind of 'wise ass' humor. ( In Australia we call it 'smart ass') . This works great in ways that I do not really understand.
( there have been some failures with dour people). I have no problems having and keeping lady friends (wink). I just have to be careful that I censor my humor a little because sometimes it can get a tad confrontive.
I found that this kind of humor works as some kind of mysterious attractant to both sexes. Don't ask me how or why it works - I don't get it either.
I went through my 'intellectual' period when I used wisdom and intellect as a kind of lady bait. Nah! I ended up dating shy school teachers( even married one). Before that I was in the grip of the juice and all the resuers and 'caretakers' would come by with a bowl of soup.They disappeared when I got sober.
So I got into AA 14 years ago and quit smoking and dumped prescription meds and went on a journey, with my eyes open, without the people who were trying to 'help' me. Still in pain sometimes but it is OK now.

Jophil ( John)

Brigid · « **Reply #35 on:** June 22, 2005, 10:57:06 PM »

John,

Quote

Hi Girls, the post above from 'Guest' sighed 'John' is mine - I just forgot to logon.

Thanks for clearing that up. The fact that it was signed John was a hint.

Sorry, I can be a bit of a smart ass at times, too.

So what actually was inside the package in the plain brown wrapper??

I need to find a new activity get involved in. For some reason ballroom dance doesn't appeal, but I need to find something that will keep me busy on weekends and meeting new friends. I started curling over the winter and that was great, so now I need a substitute for the warmer months.

Any suggestions out there?

Brigid

jophil · « **Reply #36 on:** June 23, 2005, 12:20:41 AM »

Hey Brigid, I really urge you toss away those fluffy slipper things , put the cat outside and slide on down to Arthur Murray. Dance may not appeal to you right now but why now give it a whirl? That way I get a ready-made dance partner next time I am in your neck of the woods.
( Gee this forum is getting to be like Match.com)

John... ( Gotta go do some waltz practise right now)

Plucky G2 · « **Reply #37 on:** June 23, 2005, 12:49:27 AM »

Quote

The issue of social success and popularity is particularly significant for me as an adult child of N parents. I was painfully introverted as a child and never sought out the 'in'crowd in high school . I was socially withdrawn because my self image was in fragments thanks to my family system which resembled a psychological Auswitz.
...I transformed my pain into a kind of 'wise ass' humor. ( In Australia we call it 'smart ass') . This works great in ways that I do not really understand.
( there have been some failures with dour people). ...I just have to be careful that I censor my humor a little because sometimes it can get a tad confrontive.

Hi John,
Ditto on the social success as a teen for me. Also on the sense of humor. I think most comedians come from dysfunctional backgrounds. Happy people don't have irony. I also have to watch it because I do not always know the boundaries beyond which you hurt or offend people.

Quote

Hi girls

You aussies are too much.

brigid, you're curling? You rule! What are your curling mates doing during (what passes for) summer there?

totally
Plucky

Bliz · « **Reply #38 on:** June 23, 2005, 07:08:26 AM »

Forgive me for not reading the whole thread. This may have been mentioned. Fear of disease keeps me from one night stands. Sure it was great in the 70's, pre AIDS. But I am too chicken these days.

Looking back, I would have to say that one night stands were never satisfying in the long run. There are other ways to satisfy your sexual urges that dont involve drinking and swapping DNA with strangers. I think, one night stands, do a number on a female head in general.

Through my own experience, I firmly believe that women are generally hardwired to seek intimacy while men may seek sex. I believe for women, once sex occurrs there is a emotional and mental shift, whether we want it or not. Our shift is toward the nesting/nurturing end which may not be actually possible or even appropriate with a one night stand. Becuase of this, we are often left to pick up the emotional pieces after a one night stand where men may have an easier time of shifting gears from "sex only".

So the short answer is, It's not for me.

Brigid · « **Reply #39 on:** June 23, 2005, 09:47:15 AM »

Plucky,

Quote

brigid, you're curling? You rule! What are your curling mates doing during (what passes for) summer there?

Oh, it is definitely summer here. The high is suppose to get to 92 degrees today and very humid.

I think a lot of them are golfers and I am too, but golf doesn't have quite the same social element that curling does (after all curling is always followed by drinking) and is always done in daytime hours. Since I just took up curling last year, I haven't developed a strong bond with many of the other members yet, but they are a great group. Our curling club is actually marching in the local 4th of July parade (being held this coming weekend--don't ask) to create more awareness of the sport and club. We're always looking for new members.

John, I've heard that ballroom dance is a very expensive hobby. Am I wrong?

Sorry for the hijack. Back to sex.

Brigid

bunny · « **Reply #40 on:** June 23, 2005, 09:59:37 AM »

Through my own experience, I firmly believe that women are generally hardwired to seek intimacy while men may seek sex. I believe for women, once sex occurrs there is a emotional and mental shift, whether we want it or not. Our shift is toward the nesting/nurturing end which may not be actually possible or even appropriate with a one night stand. Becuase of this, we are often left to pick up the emotional pieces after a one night stand where men may have an easier time of shifting gears from "sex only".

Bliz,

I totally agree. Women cannot share their bodies without consequences. I think men are affected as well but they manage to compartmentalize the effects better. Women become bonded instantly and they have to be VERY CAREFUL. My few one night stands (eons ago) managed to avoid doing "it" so I actually have good memories of them. In my case there is a line in the sand after which I bond powerfully and it could be very self-destructive for me.

bunny

P · « **Reply #41 on:** June 23, 2005, 12:59:05 PM »

Interesting thread

I haven't had sex with another person (or anything else alive

, please....) for er....counts on fingers....4+ years. I haven't exactly missed it. But then I've been concentrating on what have been more important things for me - the stuff in my head. Maybe I'll think about this more now? Maybe I'm really repressing that side of me?

Nevertheless, how about not doing it for a while Write? It isn't a crime to just leave off for a while, even though we might think we're being at odds with the rest of humanity!

If it's sexual tension that irks, we don't require another person to release it........

And if we do, we tend to be using that person as an object and probably vice-versa. If we think it's okay to be an object, and the other person does too, I guess that's okay.

These days women can also pay for it. How does that sound? Serious question!

gotta go for now, portia

write · « **Reply #42 on:** June 23, 2005, 02:38:12 PM »

I didn't mean I was running around having sex all over the place you know!

But was it Stormchild mentioned the mania thing ( I have bipolar ) I quess if I was there'd be a medical explanation!

Actually, if I was manic it would be quite dangerous- those are times without discernment or concern for personal safety or sexual health or friendships...

No I don't have a lot of sex, but I don't have a problem with the occasional one-night stand either.

I know it's just meeting a need or having some fun.

I DEFINITELY WON'T BE PAYING FOR IT! If I have to pay I'll get a manicure or pedicure or a good massage...something else that makes me feel good, it doesn't feel right to me to pay for sex, too many years of exploitation there....

Resolution · « **Reply #43 on:** June 23, 2005, 06:36:20 PM »

It's 5345BC and I'm horny! I meet a female and she's tail high and gagging......we're both gagging.....we fulfill our genetic function with various....ugggggs and aggggggggs......

It's June 2005 and I'm sitting in a bar in down town somewhere. A gal next to me....is unwinding from her work stress watching the game. We chat....we laugh a little....we talk of our problems......and next morning, we wake up together.

We both enjoyed the moment........maybe.....we both get on with our civilised lifes. Things have changed a little in 10,000 years, the conversation in the morning is better

Anonymous · « **Reply #44 on:** June 23, 2005, 10:06:34 PM »

Ick, no thanks, if that's all the caring and commitment that goes into it, tell the lady to get an "appliance".

It starts out clean, she'll always know where it's been, and it'll never turn surly or vicious afterwards.

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