Is It Always N Behavior to Violate Others' Boundaries?

[BonesMS]

There is one dilemma though.  Several months ago, a neighbor and I committed to a yard sale, in another city, to get rid of the clutter in our homes.  Unfortunately, "said friend" will be at the same yard sale, next week, so it's going to be a bit awkward.

Bones

To give an update:

When this committment was made, several months ago, my neighbor requested that she be given information well ahead of time because she is a single mother with an elementary school-age child and she needs time to make the necessary accommodations.  "Said friend" waits until LITERALLY the LAST SECOND to provide this information and expected us to instantaneously drop what we needed to do for her convenience!  As a result, the neighbor could not participate in the yard sale and Nfriend continued to act completely clueless!  (Again, I think it's passive-aggressive narcissim toward people who are parents since fate did not allow her to achieve motherhood.)  I REALLY DESPISE NARCISSISTS!!!!!

Bones

[BonesMS]

Dear Bones
 .I think that you have the MO of your friend(if we use that term). It is really hard to see and face the truth, though.Isn't it?                      Ami

Thanks, Ami.

Given that we have basicly known each other since we were in high school, it took awhile to comprehend a lot of things.  (I didn't know about narcissism before I started researching the behavior recently.)  Now that things are starting to make a little more sense, I'm finding that I'm less tolerant of the BS.

Bones

[BonesMS]

Something I observed during the yard sale that really has me puzzled.  At one point, while Nfriend was sitting with a plate of food in her lap, a yellow jacket started buzzing around her.  Having been stung by yellow jackets myself, I didn't want to see anyone else stung.  Those little buggers are NASTY!!!  I commented that there was a yellow jacket hovering around her plate of food.  Any other person with half a brain would have looked at the plate to notice the wasp.  Nfriend gives me the glassy-eyed stare and goes:  "Huh?  Wha...???" then looks everywhere else EXCEPT down at her plate of food where the yellow jacket is sitting!!!!!  Completely oblivious!!!!!  All I could do was shake my head and figure:  "Idiot!  If you want to get stung, go ahead and be my guest!  I've done my duty!"

Bones

[JanetLG]

Bones,

Well, going by the behaviour of my Nsister, I would say that they'd do ANYTHING rather than take the advice of someone else....even if it means getting stung by a yellow jacket. If SHE'D seen the yellow jacket FIRST, she might have behaved more like a normal person. But no.


Janet

[BonesMS]

Bones,

Well, going by the behaviour of my Nsister, I would say that they'd do ANYTHING rather than take the advice of someone else....even if it means getting stung by a yellow jacket. If SHE'D seen the yellow jacket FIRST, she might have behaved more like a normal person. But no.


Janet

I would say that Nfriend and Nsister are both idiots!

Bones

[BonesMS]

At one point, this past week, Nfriend sends me an e-mail asking me to go shopping with her (at the last minute, of course).  I respond with:  "No.  I have an appointment this evening."  As I'm getting ready to leave for my appointment, she shows up at my door with:  "You can go shopping with me now...right??????"  Again, I respond with:  "NO!  I have an appointment and I'm getting ready to leave for it!"  Her response, (with the blank stare and glazed eyes):  "Oh-h-h-h-h!  You can't go shopping with me now!"  (What part of the word "No" does she NOT understand?)  I didn't bother to tell her that the appointment was for a manicure and a pedicure.  (I had been on a waiting list for a month and I was looking forward to having my very FIRST pedicure in my life.)  When she noticed my manicure, the next day, she had to comment:  "Oh-h-h-h-h!  So THAT was your APPOINTMENT!"  (Did I hear just a hint of sarcasm in her voice?)     (Not my problem.)

Bones

[JanetLG]

Bones...you don't think MY Nsister could be YOUR Nfriend, do you?

Just a thought. 


Janet

[changing]

Bonesy-

Two Words- Vicious Guard Dog (OK that was 3 words, but you understand my point I hope - unexpected guests, other than George Clooney pining for a date, get greeted by rows of gleaming white snapping teeth!) I used to have a house near a  neighbor on a hill. She had several  pair of Rottweilers who could scan the vast area from on high and come bounding down toward any potential tresspassers . Quite awe-inspiring and effective ...

Love,

Changing

[Ami]

Dear Bones,
  You are really funny and cute  .
                                                    Ami

[BonesMS]

Bones...you don't think MY Nsister could be YOUR Nfriend, do you?

Just a thought. 


Janet

Who knows???????

Bones

[BonesMS]

Bonesy-

Two Words- Vicious Guard Dog (OK that was 3 words, but you understand my point I hope - unexpected guests, other than George Clooney pining for a date, get greeted by rows of gleaming white snapping teeth!) I used to have a house near a  neighbor on a hill. She had several  pair of Rottweilers who could scan the vast area from on high and come bounding down toward any potential tresspassers . Quite awe-inspiring and effective ...

Love,

Changing

   Thanks, Changing!  Since I live in a condominium development, I'm not sure how to adapt a large dog to a small space.

Bones

[BonesMS]

Dear Bones,
  You are really funny and cute  .
                                                    Ami

   Thanks, Ami!   

Bones

[Iphi]

Bonesy-

Two Words- Vicious Guard Dog (OK that was 3 words, but you understand my point I hope - unexpected guests, other than George Clooney pining for a date, get greeted by rows of gleaming white snapping teeth!) I used to have a house near a  neighbor on a hill. She had several  pair of Rottweilers who could scan the vast area from on high and come bounding down toward any potential tresspassers . Quite awe-inspiring and effective ...

Love,

Changing

I've always wanted to say "Release the hounds!"  How lucky your neighbor was changing.

[changing]

Iphi-

Release the hounds! That is cool. Unfortunately, my own mismatched set of rescued hounds might give someone laughing fits, but they do not have that Rottweler effect!

Bonesy- can you believe that I just figured out what BonesMS is??!!??? Bonsey Mistress of Science. How utterly beautiful- I am so proud of you!!!

Love,
Changing

[Certain Hope]

Dear Bones,

I only want to know one thing...

what color are your toenails???

 

and Iphi.... I'll have to try that on the UPS driver next time he comes 'round.... Release the hounds!!!  lol
Today he saw my precious little Daisy Dawg's very large brown head at the open window (and heard her ferocious woo woo WOO) and opted for leaving the package outside the back door. Who needs to knock when you've got a built in visitor-announcement-system!