Somatoform Disorder_____Izzy

[Izzy_*now*]

Just some info that has come to my attention by a specialist...

The tremors I experienced on the roadside, 3 years and 5+ months ago,  March 27, 2009, are still with me.

It was Feb/10 when I saw my family doctor about them, he referred me to a neurologist, who was useless to me. He said they were likely voluntary as opposed to physiological (I misunderstood 'voluntary' as 'on purpose' such as hypochondriac!)

My family doctor then would not refer me to a Physiatrist (as that was over-doctoring) and I was left up in the air, with a note from him that there would never be a diagnosis of my tremors……seen by many and tried to be treated in hospital without my knowledge with so many drugs, I was “wasted” and don’t remember much bad behaviour on my part, like slugging a nurse and more.

My lawyer arranged an appointment with the Physiatrist, but it would be 9 long months. One week before the Appointment, I received a call that the 2 hour block had NOT been booked for me (She was fired by my lawyer) I had to wait another 6 months for my appointment, which was May 16, 2012

His report was sent to me yesterday, for me to peruse for any errors as I saw them, as this report is the equivalent to swearing in Court. It is Independent and is taking neither side.

From his report (25 pages long):

Third, with regard to symptomatology:
 (a) Immediate symptoms included pain of the left groin and hip region. Additional early symptoms that developed by the time of assessment in the emergency physician are of twitching of the left eye, left face, and both arms.
Fourth, with regard to physical findings:
 (a) Presentation: Ms. ____ was a straightforward historian but there was an unusual facial and upper body tremor that was inconsistently triggered by touching the scalp.
ADJUSTMENT DISORDER.
I agree with Dr. Ellwood, clinical psychologist, that the trauma of the 2009 MVA has overwhelmed Ms______ and rendered her more anxious than normal. The increased anxiety has had both emotionally and somatoform manifestations. On an emotional level, Ms. _____ has experienced increased nervousness with a diminished ability to cope. On a somatoform level, she has developed the aforementioned psychogenic tremor. The psychogenic tremor would be considered a somatoform disorder in which there is conversion of psychological distress (anxiety) into a physical problem (tremor).

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=51DQL0bBEnc is of a polar bear.... of all videos.... that resembles the tremors and settling of them that I have. You can see why he was stressed/traumatized.

I guess I have had enough stress and trauma, that that is why I blanked out when I saw that the car had control over my chair….then came to, on the ground, in awful pain and the tremors began, abruptly.

If you were a Judge or on a Jury would you believe this from such a Specialist and in particular if I "tremor out" in court? Would you believe this to fit into" loss, pain and suffering" ?

I began to wonder about psychological just a couple of months back when the ‘new' car wash scared the  ‘stuffing’  out of me when a very forceful rinse water came on. I went into full out tremor load, then again having my teeth cleaned when the unexpected noise began in my mouth for polishing. And then again when I had a bomb game open behind what I was doing on the computer, and an explosion set me off again. i.e. i didn't need the pain to set me off. that ususally happens mainly in bed!


What is a somatoform disorder?
Somatoform disorder is the name for a group of conditions in which the physical pain and symptoms a person feels are related to psychological factors. These symptoms can't be traced to a specific physical cause. In people who have a somatoform disorder, medical test results are either normal or don't explain the person's symptoms.
People who have this disorder may have several medical evaluations and tests to be sure that they don't have another illness. They often become very worried about their health because they don't know what's causing their health problems. Their symptoms are similar to the symptoms of other illnesses and may last for several years. People who have a somatoform disorder are not faking their symptoms. The pain that they feel is real.

1 of 4 types is:
Conversion disorder is when physical symptoms that are similar to a neurological disorder develop, when no neurological disorder is actually present. Paralysis of an arm or leg, vision loss, hearing loss and seizures are common symptoms. Stress may make the symptoms worse.

Getting there,
Izzy

[lighter]

Well I'm not shocked that you have a bonified dx, Skits.

I'm shocked you haven't already received  a huge settlement, and been allowed to move on with your life in the best possible way imaginable.

You've revisited and suffered an overtly traumatic event in your life..... then had incompetent clowns in charge if your medical care.

This accident costing you pieces of yourself, AND effecting your mobility, and your ability to care for yourself.  You couldn't work any longer.

I'm shocked it's just ticks and tremors...... you're so strong, you've managed to remain sane, but there has to be fallout, Skits, and that's what this Dr. sees.  I'm sure the people who've doubted you, accused you of making this up, and minimized your pain, loss and depth of injury will have karma land squarely on their heads when they least expect it.  Terrible, but I'm praying you can get to a courtroom, be understood, and somehow be compensated in a way that will impact your life positively, and ease your burden.

That wouldn't be fair, but it would be right.

Esp if it does't take another 2 or 3 or 4 years to get over with.

How are you doing, and what does the time frame for a trial look like?

Lighter

[sKePTiKal]

Ah. I have this too, Skits... but over the years, I have learned a few tricks to keep it under control. (All except the skin stuff... and if I can ever get my diet under control... that'll clear up, too. ALL of this is connected.)

It kinda comes and goes - and I can go years without dealing with more than a mild reminder. Just this week, I got the full force left side of my body affects -- neck/shoulder again, down through my hip, knee and that blasted ankle. Simultaneously, I was feeling some depression/anxiety come on. (Reasons that aren't personal this time - but would involve a whole thread.) I'm sleeping in a weird pattern, too.

The best things that work for me (and no, I'm not currently doing any of them): journaling, meditating, tai chi. And my computer puzzle game. In other words, kinda like Right Brain physical therapy - intentionally engaging the right brain on a specialized task, meant to exercise it - and boost the well-being hormones and experiences. My Left-brain dictator seems to have the upper-hand right now (incompetent and as nasty, mean judgemental as it is)... and it thinks there's no basis for why those things work - it's all airy-fairy, fantasy-stuff - and it embarrasses, shames and humiliates me -- my own mind, yes -- for thinking I deserve to do these things and "feel better".

Left brain has the memory of an elephant - never forgets. And it has a whole collection of my mom's favorite put-downs stored in it. Letting my Right brain counter-balance sleep, atrophy, whatever by not working out with it... gets me right back to this point on the circle... and I have to re-learn again what I used to know.

I don't know that this stuff would help you -- but anything similar - that exercises right brain - might help.

[Izzy_*now*]

Thank you lighter and PR

I will take this over an overload that would cause a nervous breakdown. (I gave permission for the report to be sent to my family doctor who said there would never be a diagnosis for the tremors.)

Now the denist can complete his report, as he required proof that the tremors were accident-related before it would be worth anything to me (us) in Court.

Court is April/2013, and ICBC has been quoted as saying, "If you want Court monies, you have to go to Court".

My lawyer cannot raise our amount, but the Courts can, as the tremors were " blowing in the wind'  back then and my teeth were not included.

xxoo
Iz

[Hopalong]

Whew.
I am so so so glad there's PROGRESS, Izz..

Documents.
Affadavitty things.

YESSSS!

love,
Hops

[teartracks]

If you were a Judge or on a Jury would you believe this from such a Specialist and in particular if I "tremor out" in court? Would you believe this to fit into" loss, pain and suffering" ?[

I would Izz.  I would.

Did I read right that some of your tremor episodes were triggered by certain sounds?  As you were being hit, there must have been countless sounds with that car hitting you and your chair.  So in essence, if it is sounds that trigger it, you may experience tremor episodes in the future if you hear a sound that you experienced as you were being hit.  Frightening.  You're amazing.

tt


 

[lighter]

April?

Of 2013?

It's like watching incompetent asshats drag you down the sidewalk, quipping off what they feel they want to pay for without any regard for best care, while pieces of you drop off as they go.

Then there's this (years out) distant courtdate, with who in charge of your care?  The people who're likely hoping you won't survive long enough to attend the far far farrrr away courtdate? 

::smoothing skirt::

 I forget, did you say that you'll likely not receive anything for your pain and suffering?  Are these karma challenged bean counters, dickering over paying you monies that will barely pay for your care, dickering over care of the damage to your teeth, or are they dickering over paying you anything at all?  WHY do you have to go to court if they've set the amount they'll pay, and there's no chance of asking for more?

I understand the Judge can change the amount, but is it just for the care you need, or something more?

Lighter

[Izzy_*now*]

hi Hops

Yes everything is documented, and also in my mind. The specialist noted that my recollection was right on with the documents he studied.

Hi tt

Sounds, yes, but sounds that startled me...usually a temporary fright...but the last three startling experiences sent me into the whole tremor scene. I wondered then, to Karla, if this was 'psychological' . Upon researching, some people have them forever. The nighttime tremors could be from the many ' scary'  dreams I have been having since the accident.

Hi Lighter

Court is 7 months away. I waited 15 months to see the Specialist. At my age time goes faster. The Insurance company is not aware of the report from the Physical therapist, who designed my therapy sessions for Karla to assist me in implementing.... nor the report form the Physiatrist..... nor the yet to come report about the damage done to my teeth from the gnashing, during tremors.

After the Examination for Discovery, the Insurance lawyer dropped their 3rd offer by $18,000.00.....to scare me into accepting? No! These reports were in the making

There is "non-pecuniary damages" ("loss, pain and suffering") (the Cap here is $300,000.00)
.. then "Special Damages ( money from my pocket, as in paying Karla for 2 years +,  meds etc.)
.. then "Future Care" (will be Supplies and Therapy for my lifetime) I have independent therapists etc, saying I require lifetime therapy, or deteriorate.

I expect that the insurance lawyer is not in the postion to offer "Court monies' The big corporations try to get away with scare tactics, but a judge can overrule them and set his amounts that he sees fit maybe even the jury can..??  but the amount set by my lawyers was too high for a large corporation to just agree and not fight, and perhaps hope that I die first.

However, with people saying I look 50, not 73, it will likely shock, in Court, as it shocked the Insurance lawyer at the Examination.

In quitting smoking (Nov/10), getting plenty of sleep (at the expense of my socialization) and adjusting my diet to more healthy food (in particular no red meat) it will count about my " helping myself".

I research a lot, and one guy who gained a lot of weight, was penalized in his settlement for NOT taking care of himself, and try hard to heal.


Nevertheless, all is still unknown!...just like everything else in life.

Love
Izzy

P.S. Do I sound mentally disordered? I don't think so, but I officially have a mental disorder....that will go over well with my family, so I have to be quiet about some details.

[Hopalong]

It's like this. The word "disorder" sounds threatening, but it's just a word.

It can be used to describe physical, psychological, or combo symptoms.

It's perfectly okay to have one, Izz. NO SHAME. Don't act like it's anything to be ashamed of, don't treat it like a secret. It's a matter-of-fact description just the way MS or asthma or depression or NPD or whatever...or sensory processing disorder or ventricular atrial fibrillation or whateveritis...

Don't add shame for a name (that you didn't cause) to the weight on your plate.

It's just a vocabulary word. Mature people know that and wouldn't use it as an excuse to be unkind. Ignorant people who'd bash you for something you can't help? They can go back to life-school....

love
Hops

[teartracks]

That's what I thought Izz.  I was also thinking that with the brain being infinitely complex and considering that it records virtually every thing that goes on around it or in it, then each and every nano sound that happened as you were being hit has the potential to trigger the tremors.  It makes perfect sense that dreams/nightmares would have the same triggering effect if they mimic sounds that took place (even those sounds in the surrounding area that were not caused directly by being hit) when you were hit.  If I were a judge/jury, I would be very sensitive to that information and the effect it has on the quality of your life.

tt

[lighter]

Izz:

We're all "disordered" when it comes to facing unknowns and living with it for extended periods of time.

You recovered best case scenario from first accident..... truly amazing, Izz.

Then came the second accident, for Pete's sake.

With tremors.

And the hip/joint complication that changed your life, yet again, forever. (Not to mention the length of your leg.)

And resulting surgery after months of suffering that didn't necessarily have to take place, with asshat doctors telling you to stop whining, they were doing everything for you, blah blah blah/cut to post surgery and there you were, with more asshats telling you what kind of rehab you could have or not.

You weren't driving your car any longer.  (Like the guy who hit you is.)

You had to give up your job. (The guy who hit you prolly still has his.)

You were suffering, no longer caring for yourself, and for you,  just surviving every day was a challenge. (This is something that can't be restored wholly, even if you received all the money in the world, which you won't.)

And then you had to begin documenting, worrying about not getting enough money just to cover expenses for your injuries, and meeting with legal people while you were suffering and struggling in every way imaginable.

I
am
so
appalled you had to deal with this accident on your own again, Izz, and the insurance company doesn't factor in anything but how hard they can drive you to the ground and force you to say UNCLE.

They want to screw you out of damages, and in your particular case, this is a whole'nuther injury they've inflicted...... (with purpose, and intentionally.)

I hope your attorney can make that clear, and educate your Judge and Jury accordingly.

Like I said..... even if the insurance company gives you a fair amount, it can't make up for what they've contributed to your suffering, IMO.

I also want to suggest you consider contacting a victims advocacy group, Izz.  They may have some suggestions your attorney hasn't thought of.  It might be good to have a victim's rights advocate go to the hearing/s with you, and just BE there.  I know I've seen a victim's rights advocate do a pretty good job in the courtroom to bring attention to important things that could make a difference, IRL trial situations, getting the Judge's attention, and forcing that Judge to punish someone in the courtroom right there and then, which can throw them off their game.

Everyone's expecting the insurance companies to behave in an egregiously offensive manner, so they get away with it. 

I hope your Judge/Jury can put themselves in your too tight wheelchair, and feel the ball of their bone break away after weeks of torment...........
be present when they picture themselves suffering through your daily ablutions of going to the toilette, bathing, getting in and out of bed, and futile attempts to seek relief through sleep that would not come, night after night, week after week.  Tremors and pain jerking you awake, and present, with no respite.  Your Judge and Jury will have to be educated, and your attorney will have to make all this plain for them to "feel." 

The insurance companies have very deep pockets, Izz. 

A fair settlement for you is a blip on their screen, and a fair settlement is the very least you're entitled to.  The Jury and Judge must "like" you though, Izz.  You have to use your humor, speak slowly, politely and calmly, like you're speaking to a child about something important. 

This too, shall pass.

Lighter

[Izzy_*now*]

Thank you lighter,

You are very articulate and perceptive about my case, so I know you have been listening.

For one thiing, I cannot see me presenting myself as a 'victim' per se. My lawyer is ready, willing and able to do that.

Dr V., the Specialist, noted me a euthymic (pertaining to a normal mood in which the range of emotions is neither depressed nor highly elevated.)...something I have talked about before, the 'straightforward historian' with the lack of 'affect' such as no crying, no yelling, no swearing etc. I'll likely present myself as a survivor, but I am a wounded survivor.

In a wheelchair, one's lap is very important for carrying things, as 2 hands are busy propelling to destination.... the garbage bag to the dumpster, the laundry basket to the laundry room, the infant grandchild could lay head to bum on the dip between my legs, with their legs running up my chest, so I could rock them and peel potaoes at the same time... that useful lap is now slanted because of some swelling that ended up as a blob of painful fat in my upper inner thigh (can't cross my legs anymore and it was always a relief, before, with long periods of sitting) but still that leg is shorter and my knees don't meet in length or togetherness, as the left knee rotates outward, being there is no femoral head to fasten the femor to my acetabulum?  hip socket.

That is just another example whereby I had to fix the situation for my being independent.  Before I could do certain jobs, I would need a level lap and compared a "pad" like those bean bag ashtrays that would adjust themselves to a rounded sofa arm. It works. (I can propel with a mug of hot coffee on my lap.) I would like to present myself as someone who advcates for herself, and is a survivor, but not lessen the damage that has been done.

I cannot think too far in advance, right now until I next speak with my lawyer about the last expected report. Putting all 3 professional reports together will give him his plan of action.

If we go to court and some fool asks me how I am, I will not use the mundane answer of "Fine"

I will say that " I've been feeling run down of late!"

When the nurse asked me, after the 3rd surgery how I felt, as I came out of the anesthetic, I said, 'Like I've been hit by a car".  This is all I can do to not appear always euthymic.

I'm not a happy camper, but I am also not a whiner.

xx
Izzy

[lighter]

Izz:

I think it's difficult to wrap our minds around speaking plainly about bad things happening to us, bc it makes us feel like whiney victims, which we're not.  The problem is, compensating usually means we present ourselves in a light of strength and non vimtim status, which can seriously mislead listeners about the seriousness of our circumstances, and actual facts involved in our cases. 

We aren't victims, but sometimes we find ourselves in circumstances that could be considered victimizing(is that a word?), and I suppose it becomes a situation where we're victimized IF we accept what's happening to us, and fail to advocate as effectively as possible.  We've done it before, we'll do it again, but it's good to learn from the past, and apply our knowledge to being even better advocates for ourselves this time around, yes?

I know you've been in positions where you can't advocate for youself, for example:  When you were out of it after the accidents, and you were at the mercy of hospital staff, insurance company(bean courters), and perhaps family members;  when you were post op; when you were recovering; when you were struggling and learning to care for yourself again.

There are facts involved, and call them what you will, there were mistakes made with your care, and bad calls by the bean counters/doctors that added to your pain and suffering, long term recovery and ability to function.  That needs to be explained, and you need to disconnect the wires that make you feel like a whiner when explaining these facts, IMO.  They can harm you further in the courtroom if you down play something the Judge and Jury need to understand well enough that they can walk a mile in your sturdy orthopedic shoes during your trial. 

I'm still shocked every time I think of the insurance company dragging you through a trial.  Egregious under the circumstances, IMO.  They know how difficult it is for you to get around outside your environment.  They know how much it taxes you to be out of your routine, yet they've made it a priority to drag you through trial prep, and attending a trial.....

why?

Because they don't even want to pay you for the cost of your care, never mind pain and suffering.

THE NERVE!

The Judge won't be blind to your struggles if you can lay the facts out there for him/her.

I really think you're going to be OK if your attorney is at all competent, Izzy. 

Lighter

Any more thoughts as to putting your story out there in a warmhearted human interest piece on the 5oclock news channel of your choice? 

How about contacting a victime's advocacy group?  I was shocked to see how involved they were in a case I was involved in.

[sKePTiKal]

Dr V., the Specialist, noted me a euthymic (pertaining to a normal mood in which the range of emotions is neither depressed nor highly elevated.)...something I have talked about before, the 'straightforward historian' with the lack of 'affect' such as no crying, no yelling, no swearing etc.

Maybe it's just me, Iz... but "euthymic" sounds synonymous with "normal", easy-going, level-headed.
And that this is what we're all supposed to work (controlling our emotional extremes) to attain.

????

[Izzy_*now*]

Hi lighter

Any more thoughts as to putting your story out there in a warmhearted human interest piece on the 5oclock news channel of your choice?  

I just might if there is/are any misinterpretations of the truth, if we go to court and this is publicized... it will be to add or correct infirmation, like the over-drugging of me turning me into an 'addict', for instance!

hi PR,

I have generally always spoken this way, no matter the topic, as though I am referring to someone else, especially when I speak of my own traumas.

Just the facts, Ma' am.

In my quest to understand things, I have to 'question' terms that are used to describe me. In this case levelheaded would have suited me better than euthymic, so that I wouldn't have to use a 'dictionary' .

all the best
Iz