Reframing CHANGING habits to IMPROVING them by just 1%

[lighter]

OK, this 1% stuff struck a chord with me today.   I've started picking up sticks in the yard every time I take the dog out.  I stomp mole holes flat, replace uprooted moss, and look forward to a nicer looking yard in general..... everything, bark, acorns, pine needles mess up the moss' lush groove.  Grabbing a few handfuls 4 or 5 times a day isn't hard. 

  Also, I'm looking forward to not dealing with months of branch and twig build up...... it can take hours... so hard on the back. 

::whispering::

Hops.... I'm interested in my yard again. 



Lighter



James Clear

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This Coach Improved Every Tiny Thing by 1 Percent and Here’s What Happened
By James Clear    |    Continuous Improvement, Goal Setting, Self-Improvement

In 2010, Dave Brailsford faced a tough job.

No British cyclist had ever won the Tour de France, but as the new General Manager and Performance Director for Team Sky (Great Britain’s professional cycling team), Brailsford was asked to change that.

His approach was simple.

Brailsford believed in a concept that he referred to as the “aggregation of marginal gains.” He explained it as “the 1 percent margin for improvement in everything you do.” His belief was that if you improved every area related to cycling by just 1 percent, then those small gains would add up to remarkable improvement.

They started by optimizing the things you might expect: the nutrition of riders, their weekly training program, the ergonomics of the bike seat, and the weight of the tires.

But Brailsford and his team didn’t stop there. They searched for 1 percent improvements in tiny areas that were overlooked by almost everyone else: discovering the pillow that offered the best sleep and taking it with them to hotels, testing for the most effective type of massage gel, and teaching riders the best way to wash their hands to avoid infection. They searched for 1 percent improvements everywhere.

Brailsford believed that if they could successfully execute this strategy, then Team Sky would be in a position to win the Tour de France in five years time.

He was wrong. They won it in three years.

In 2012, Team Sky rider Sir Bradley Wiggins became the first British cyclist to win the Tour de France. That same year, Brailsford coached the British cycling team at the 2012 Olympic Games and dominated the competition by winning 70 percent of the gold medals available.

In 2013, Team Sky repeated their feat by winning the Tour de France again, this time with rider Chris Froome. Many have referred to the British cycling feats in the Olympics and the Tour de France over the past 10 years as the most successful run in modern cycling history.

And now for the important question: what can we learn from Brailsford’s approach?
The Aggregation of Marginal Gains

It’s so easy to overestimate the importance of one defining moment and underestimate the value of making better decisions on a daily basis.

Almost every habit that you have — good or bad — is the result of many small decisions over time.

And yet, how easily we forget this when we want to make a change.

So often we convince ourselves that change is only meaningful if there is some large, visible outcome associated with it. Whether it is losing weight, building a business, traveling the world or any other goal, we often put pressure on ourselves to make some earth-shattering improvement that everyone will talk about.

Meanwhile, improving by just 1 percent isn’t notable (and sometimes it isn’t even noticeable). But it can be just as meaningful, especially in the long run.

And from what I can tell, this pattern works the same way in reverse. (An aggregation of marginal losses, in other words.) If you find yourself stuck with bad habits or poor results, it’s usually not because something happened overnight. It’s the sum of many small choices — a 1 percent decline here and there — that eventually leads to a problem.
marginal gains
Inspiration for this image came from a graphic in The Slight Edge by Jeff Olson.

In the beginning, there is basically no difference between making a choice that is 1 percent better or 1 percent worse. (In other words, it won’t impact you very much today.) But as time goes on, these small improvements or declines compound and you suddenly find a very big gap between people who make slightly better decisions on a daily basis and those who don’t. This is why small choices don’t make much of a difference at the time, but add up over the long-term.

On a related note, this is why I love setting a schedule for important things, planning for failure, and using the “never miss twice” rule. I know that it’s not a big deal if I make a mistake or slip up on a habit every now and then. It’s the compound effect of never getting back on track that causes problems. By setting a schedule to never miss twice, you can prevent simple errors from snowballing out of control.
The Bottom Line

    Success is a few simple disciplines, practiced every day; while failure is simply a few errors in judgment, repeated every day.
    —Jim Rohn

You probably won’t find yourself in the Tour de France anytime soon, but the concept of aggregating marginal gains can be useful all the same.

Most people love to talk about success (and life in general) as an event. We talk about losing 50 pounds or building a successful business or winning the Tour de France as if they are events. But the truth is that most of the significant things in life aren’t stand-alone events, but rather the sum of all the moments when we chose to do things 1 percent better or 1 percent worse. Aggregating these marginal gains makes a difference.

There is power in small wins and slow gains. This is why average speed yields above average results. This is why the system is greater than the goal. This is why mastering your habits is more important than achieving a certain outcome.

Where are the 1 percent improvements in your life?
 
Read Next

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Focus Retriever

[lighter]

Small... incremental changes.

This morning I didn't bring up a difficult matter with my 14yo dd, even though I badly wanted to.   It centers around my attending the January BIT session, which I've already booked flights and accommodations for, btw. 

I'm shocked..... baffled, bc  this child has been operating like a mini adult for..... years.  She's flown on her own outside the US and cleared customs..... gotten on planes to attend a 2 week LRP camp out of State..... did I mention she's always HATED flying..... so brave. 

I'm not that brave... LRP camp?  She's just an amazing person.... didn't get homesick ONCE.  She was happy, engaged, and perfectly comfortable among strangers she made friends with quickly.

SO, I firmed up flight reservations for my trip yesterday, and tried to go over details with her in the car ride home from school.... mistake in hindsight bc she's usually drained and hungry and this kid doesn't deal with hunger very well. 

Poor timing.  I could have improved that by 1% for sure. 

DD14 was very quiet after I finished talking, only asking one question.....

"What day of the month was I returning?"

I told her, and she just....
folded. 

Literally and figuratively..... folded, and stayed that way till we were home.  There was no getting her to talk about it.....

::shaking fist at the discomfort of keeping my pie hole shut, and not nattering at her to escape my own distress::

  After we got home she went right to sleep....
for 7 hours. 
Without a peep. 

::sigh::

She is getting over a cold, and who knows what hormones are doing to her, come to think of it.

THIS is messing with my mother instincts.  She'd usually be fine with this trip. 

I'd typically just CANCEL the flight and sign up for next session in 6 months if this was my 16yo we're talking about,  but...... this is dd14.....
I don't think I can DO that, and be OK/on the schedule I set for myself.  Honestly, she'll be fine.  Everyone who knows her can't believe this has come up. 

I let her sleep. 

When she woke I let her seek me out in her own time.... my bed time.

 I let her bring up the trip, and mirrored back what she said. 

She explained she wants me home to help her pick a dress for the dance, and pack for the weekend school trip she's been joyfully looking forward to.  She explained she "can't go from one strange place to another strange place."  I get that,and for the past 10 yeas I've always accommodated her as well as I could, perhaps bending over backwards bc of the past 10 years and what I couldn't control, but.....
it's 6 months till the next class,
which she didn't see a problem with.

I thought she'd for sure say "SIX months!  But of course you must go, Mother."  Well, maybe not that exactly. 


She was just glad it wasn't a one time deal, and asked that I please reschedule.  She was serious. 

After she ate something, and we were snugged on the sofa with tea, I tried to strike a compromise....
we'll pack ahead for the trip, choose an outfit for the dance, and make sure everything's handled that can be handled while I'm here. 

She wasn't convinced,  said she'd leave it up to me, but I should know she won't attend either event IF I went. 



This child isn't given to manipulations like that..... this is how she really feels, or....

  Do I have "not my child" goggles on? 

She likes the family she stays with, btw.... was fine with my trip till she learned I'd be gone for BOTH events.

I'm going on this trip.


Right?

Anyway this is posted here bc I'm employing the 1% better rule as I navigate this. 

Letting dd 14 come to me when she was ready to speak.  Not bringing it up this morning, when I need need need to feel better about keeping my flight in place.....
 choosing not to listen to BBC news on way to school this morning. 

::Shaking fist in the air::

Oh, short term discomfort, you are my bane!


I SO want dd14 to let me off the hook on this, and likely she will, but.... just being patient, giving her time and space to feel better about it, or not....
SO. 

Hard. 

And.... if she decides not to go to either event....
that will be ongoing discomfort for me, and......
what?   

I don't think I should feel guilty over this, so I'm trying to figure out how to just be OK with her distress.

 That's the thing, isn't it?
 

I NEED her to be OK.

 I'm compelled to fix things for my children, bc it's intuitive, but not a healthy place to live from, IME.   What does it say about me IF I DON'T fix everything for them?  That I'm a failure?  A not good enough mom?  I think it means I'm letting them grow up, learn to shift for themselves, put healthy boundaries in place, and take responsibility for their own feelings.

Whew.... that sounds SO much better to me.

DD14 and DD16 will have to learn to deal better with their own short term discomfort (std).

And I will too.   

At least by 1%; )


Lighter

[sKePTiKal]

Lighter, we had a saying in my house with girls that age (shamelessly stolen)...

"You can't always get what you want, but sometimes, you get what you need".

Yes, sometimes we do things that are HARD, things we don't WANT to do - things outside our comfort zone... and we don't have to do it perfectly; but sometimes it's really really good to just do it. We learn that nothing awful happens; the world hasn't come apart at the seams... kids can solve their own problems... and we can let go and let them.