Relationship/s

[Hopalong]

Overdoing the anxiety, I think. After the morning horrid coughing spasm she's been quiet. Not a lot of vigor but enjoying naps on the patio or curled by the big glass front door so she can watch the street (and the crows).

I forgot to mention that the bordatella vax does work (though it's no guarantee like any vax) -- and that if a vaxxed dog does get it, the case should be a lot milder. So despite the sound effects, I do think she'll be okay. Fingers crossed! She's lovely.

The SPCA foster team is excellent. They email daily and invite every question you've got. I described her symptoms/behavior in detail and today's foster-liaison asked great questions and she'll pass along the info to the clinic people. They'll decide whether she's urgent or tomorrow will be okay, or I should go pick up meds (some dogs weather bordatella without much intervention) etc. Plenty of support.

PS A doglady friend I send her pic to said 1) I'm in love, and 2) she looks like Pooch's Mini Me, just white (she's almost all white but some brown in her fur too).

[Hopalong]

I know, I'm certifiable around-the-bend old lady wacko.

BABY'S FIRST WORD!

She barked! At something out front (she likes the open door with full-length glass storm door). Kind of a little yodel-yap. Not annoying. Big surprise! And then she acted playful all of a sudden.

Damn I'm enjoying this. I've introduced her to two friends via Zoom. FUN.

Yup. Around the bend wacky old crow-dog-whatever thing has been my destiny.

hugs
Hops

[lighter]

Eh...I spent my day talking to trees and bushes.  Tending to them.  Asking them if they want too live, so baby's first words is adorable to me!!!

Glad she's feeling better, Hops.

Light

[Hopalong]

Thanks, Lighter.

As small a creature as she is, it's an adjustment. She's perking up and playful, I'm feeling the pressure of needing to housebreak a 5 y/o dog. She doesn't understand how a leash works either.

All will be well, it'll just take time and lots of patience. She's the perfect little addition for us though, I still believe. If in a week or so she's much stronger and safer and medically well, and if I then think I've bitten off more than I should've, then I'll have foster-prepared her to be strong enough to adjust to a new family. Hope that's not likely but it's a small possibility.

(Started quailing a little bit over heart fears. Half the time when I bend over for anything, I'm really light headed when I come up again and have to grab something, and the SOB - shortness of breath - is persistent. But soon I'll know. My test is the 2nd and f/u with cardiol the 4th.)

hugs
Hops

[lighter]

Breathe, Hops.  Breathe and don't lean into fear. Try not to assume the worst if you can help it.

Worry and fear aren't helpful, IME.

I hope tests bring clarity and good news.

Lighter

[Hopalong]

You are so right.
I was losing the fear battle.

Here, today, daylight, two pooches napping and no new puddles indoors, having expressed it all both here and to poet friend...I'm breathing better.

Need to do self-calming or meditation FIRST. Before it builds.

[lighter]

Yes to getting ahead of fear, ((Hops.))

Light

[Hopalong]

(I need to keep that up, Lighter. It's my biggest challenge: getting ahead of fear.)

Meanwhile, today, there is no "relationship" -- just an upcoming first (perhaps a one-off, ya know) date. Fun to anticipate.

I'm about to cancel the dating site before it renews. But one guy popped up and I enjoyed what I read. Key things to me: A comment that indicates political fit (he's not conservative), identified as agnostic (a unicorn!!!) and his pix indicated a huge interest in trains (which my Dad loved). One pic of him in the cab was captioned "My office." He sounds intelligent, is living fully (traveling through states to see siblings and blues perfomances) and sounds very interesting. Not sure about any of the rest but he's emailed promptly and seems to be anticipating it too.

We're meeting late afternoon today for a glass of wine and then dinner at a little town in between. (He lives over the mountain, no big distance.)

Caveat: It's clear he's a serious cat man, and I'm genuinely allergic. Can't breathe living with a cat. Then again, amazingly, we're not at the living-together question. LOLOLOLOL!

I will of course report back. It's fun to tell y'all everything.

hugs
Hops

[lighter]

Maybe have that glass of wine out of doors...... just in case the cat fur issue is more serious than ya'think.

You don't need an itchy nose and watering swollen eyes during the first chat, but lets see where this goes!

A lovely conversation over a glass or two of vino can be just that, or something more.

No expectations.

Lighter

[Hopalong]

Exactly. Anticipating but not expecting...I'm holding that distinction.

I'm only meeting people for any reason only outdoors (or one-off friend visits in my home where I can create sufficient fresh air circulation and seating distance). We're meeting where there's a nice open-sided tall outdoor tent, and I ain't hugging ChooChooCatMan regardless.


hugs
Hops

PS I wouldn't mind about some itchy-sneezy reaction, it's just when my "reactive airways" can slam shut. Like asthma, but without wheezing.

[Hopalong]

Lovely man, fascinating life!
Had a great time!

Many differences but maybe no core ones.
Mutual click on several levels. Gorgeous eyes
and smile. Humble sorta Maine background,
steely about values. Hmmm.

Really enjoyed meself! We talked our heads off.

More later, wine's gotta wear off.

Night and hugs,
Hops

PS  Know what he said after I confessed my cat allergy? "We'd work around it."
Purrrrrrr.....

[lighter]

Yay YAy, Hops.

Lots to think about.  I'm so glad it went well and you had a good time.

How does he feel about doggies>

Lighter

[Hopalong]

Dunno.
I'll ask if we get together again.
He sent me home with a 20-min video of his winter still photos...he spent years working for Canadian Pacific. They're really lovely. Has a cool soundtrack, too.

I'm just grateful to have had fun. Feet on brakes.

hugs
Hops

[Hopalong]

Well, I'm pleased I dunnit a few last times (then let the subscription to the findageezer website lapse). Experiences were good and interesting.

Disentangled from Train Man, who was exotic and has had a fascinating life. But I think he's not a partner candidate (I specifically need to AVOID exotic rebels, I married two of them). I wrote him about my covid precautions and mentioned I wasn't sure we were on the same page, but what did he think....and he responded that he's not going to "live in a bubble" (which I hadn't suggested). I saw that he wouldn't change a single small practice for a couple hours to make me feel more comfortable, and given how much he travels and mingles, I realized we're not a good fit. But with him, the biggest reason is what my T reminded me to pay attention to: Does he ask you any questions about yourself and your own life? Nope. He just didn't. He's looking for someone to fill the gap in his life, but I'm not sure how capable he is of seeing her. Not his fault and I still like him, but don't think we'll see each other again. All okay. Very pleased I had the two-date adventure.

Another man is considerably older but fitter than Train Man, and I did like him. He's more conservative than I am (as are most humans) and likewise interesting. But he honestly explained that he had been connecting with another person from the website, and that might be developing into something, so he felt he didn't want to string me along. Loved this part: if things don't grow into something with her, he'll get back in touch and he and I can "start again". Made me laugh, that he was so transparently explaining I'd be a Plan B. Really didn't offend me a bit because that's the way life goes. (He was married for 55 years, so is not slick at all in how he communicates -- just straightfoward). I would enjoy seeing him again and appreciated his honesty. But chances are he's on his way to another nice connection that'll be right for him.

Maybe if (when) I get unbearably lonely this winter I'll revive the subscription and correspond with a man or two. I was just hearing from so many that didn't remotely suit or didn't seem to have read a word I said, just reacted to the photo. (Even after I added my current haggard post-pandemic pix!). I also should/could/might join the fancy-schmancy senior center, and make new friends in person.

hugs
Hops

[Twoapenny]

I hope someone pops up in real life, Hops, I find the online stuff really difficult.  I did try it again after we moved here but, like you, I've mostly had messages from completely unsuitable men who've not read the profile and I think just contact literally any woman within a certain distance in the hope that one will say yes.  It's hard to sift through and then do the date thing (especially when they tell you you're option two - honesty is great but yeah, no-one likes to know they're someone else's Plan B!  I agree it's better than stringing you along though).  It's good you noticed train guy wasn't asking questions about you.  It's weird how many people do that.  I've only met one couple I don't like since we moved here and it's because they're like that - they just talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and there's no back and forth, it's so tiring.  If I see them I shoot off the other way