Author Topic: Help! I need support.  (Read 3200 times)

longtire

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Help! I need support.
« Reply #15 on: April 03, 2005, 06:26:37 PM »
Quote from: OR
The fight is on, I can only be ready to defend myself aginst them. The benifits of having him gone, out weigh the trouble. You will have so much more energy to fight the up coming war. One battle at a time, will win the war.  You will be surprized how much energy you have not dealing with the emotional rollercoaster.

I know angels are watching over my D and myself. I have found myself here with amazement and will continue to be positive about the future.

OR, try picturing every lawyer, judge, clerk, counselor, therapist, the guy who hooks up your phone, etc., I mean everybody as in on the story.  Expect them to understand, see your H as he is and go out of their way to support you and your D.  Have nothing but positive expectations and be surprised and sad for them when someone DOESN'T react the way you expect.  I've been doing this some and it helps me to feel more confidant, hopeful, and energetic.

Quote from: OR
Quote
Now confronting this change, part of my reaction was plain fear of my wife and what she will do. What will she do when she feels like she has nothing left to lose? My biggest fear is that she will go back even stronger in turning my daughter and other family and friends against me.


She will have far less energy than you. She appears stronger than you because of your being sucked lifless from an emotional vampire.

WOW!  You are right, and I didn't realize it.  I get more energy every day, even the tough days like yesterday.  She has been losing energy every day I have not let her take it from me.  She may have a store set aside, but that will run out one day.  Thank you for that observation.  That's what I love about the people here, they continue to astound you with compassion and understanding. :D
longtire

- The only thing that was ever really wrong with me was that I used to think there was something wrong with *me*.  :)

OR

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Help! I need support.
« Reply #16 on: April 03, 2005, 11:03:39 PM »
Long,

I am already telling myself your tip. I'm believing everyone Im in contact with will understand what will allow me safe passage to a better life.

A more peaceful life with my D, comfort from strangers to know the lies and their willingness to hear my words as honest, my proff aginst the lies as valid to their eyes and ears.

It's great when we can  help eachother. Thanks

Good luck, I will keep you in my thoughts.   OR

Anonymous

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Help! I need support.
« Reply #17 on: April 04, 2005, 04:09:07 PM »
Hi longtire,
How are you today my lad,
Your last post sounded much stronger.
You wrote,
Quote
Now confronting this change, part of my reaction was plain fear of my wife and what she will do. What will she do when she feels like she has nothing left to lose? My biggest fear is that she will go back even stronger in turning my daughter and other family and friends against me.

This is part of what kept me paralyzed for so long. I had seen what happened to others who didn't tote that barge and lift that bale when my brother expected them to.  :shock: :roll:  And quite frankly it scared the living daylights out of me. I knew I would get what they got only worse as I was more important to his facade than anyone else with the possible exception of our mom. I didn't realize just how far he was capable of going until I actually broke away, but that is part of the control. But its still worth it. All the slanders and libels and false accusations are worth the freedom of getting them out of our heads.
Just keep on going to the source and you can't go wrong. :wink:

mudpup

Anonymous

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Help! I need support.
« Reply #18 on: April 04, 2005, 06:01:40 PM »
Hiya Longtire:

Sorry things are overwhelming right now.  

This is just a crazy idea but what if you called the local women's shelter?
It's possible that they might have some idea of where an emotionally abused man might find an experienced therapist in your area?

Glad you're here posting and glad you were able to chat with Bunny and are feeling a bit better.

This is not an easy process and you are doing very well, even if you don't think you are.  The reason I can say that is because you are not withdrawing your decision and saying anything to indicate that you are wishy washy about it.  You are simply seeking support, which is a natural and logical thing to do and which any person in your position would be ahead to do.   It's a good sign that you are looking for help to get through this difficult time.

So good for you Longtire!  Hope each day gets better for you!

GFN

longtire

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Help! I need support.
« Reply #19 on: April 04, 2005, 07:00:58 PM »
Hi everyone!  I've taken my posts back over to my usual thread.  I'm going for the record long thread!

http://voicelessness.com/disc3/viewtopic.php?t=1047&start=300
longtire

- The only thing that was ever really wrong with me was that I used to think there was something wrong with *me*.  :)