Just housekeeping, no need for a reply

[mudpuppy]

  Any statement I have made on this site regarding my brother as an N, a Narcissist or having NPD or having any type of mental disorder or problem whatsoever has been merely my personal opinion. Any such statement was never intended to be construed as a statement of fact. These opinions were not formed haphazardly, but were based on my research and observations and also on the opinion of a medical professional who has closely observed him, as well as a licensed mental health professional.
  Likewise any statement I may have made regarding my brother as being deceptive, greedy or dishonest has also been a mere personal opinion.
  In fact, any statement implying any negative attributes or motivations to my brother whatsoever have been my personal opinion and anyone who has construed them otherwise has done so on their own initiative.
  Any statement I have made regarding my brother's actual actions have been accurate to the best of my knowledge and belief and are the facts as I know them.
Any statement I may have made regarding my intention of destroying him referred only to my intention to force him, through the legal system, to recompense me and my family for the damage he has done to us.
  I chose this board in my attempt to heal from the abuse I have undergone, partly because it does not mention the word Narcissist in the title and because it therefore took me several months to find. I concluded therefore that it was highly unlikely he or anyone else I know would see any of my posts. I have in fact attempted, by using this forum, to ensure that no one either of us knows would read anything I wrote. I have gone out of my way to ensure that he was not harmed, but that I was still able to have a forum to discuss what has occurred to me and my family.
 None of my posts were intended to harm him, or cause him damage in any form, but rather to help me heal from what has occured.
 If I had wanted to harm him or my intentions had been malicious I would have chosen a public forum that people either of us know might reasonably be expected to visit and made sure our identities were known.
  I will continue to post on this site and ask anyone reading my posts to bear in mind that my opinions of my brother are just that, mere personal opinions, and also that any relation of the facts in our lives are just that, the facts as I know them. I have posted nothing that to my knowledge is false or untrue about any person on this site.
 All of the above statements should be applied to any other person I may have mentioned on this site at anytime.
 

mudpuppy

[write]

same for us all MP, very few of us have had a formal diagnosis of NPD, partially because much of the therapeutic community chooses no longer to make such a diagnosis, maybe knowing that a client is unlikely to return to hear more! But also because of confidentiality issues.
My n-h's top psychiatrist was pretty good but refused to give him a diagnosis, though I know from talking to her and him that this was entirely the prognosis.

In England personality disorders are considered largely 'untreatable' so say if a criminal receives such a diagnosis they are looking at custodial rather than therapeutic community sentencing.

I don't know my entire thoughts as yet, I have seen n-h proceed, do well, then regress.

His psych did say that without intensive probably long-term therapy he is unlikely to change much.

Which again proved to be wrong- he reacted to that by reading every book and article on npd and trying to effect his own change.
Unfortunately- there is a lot of misinformation and too many articles written by npds which pervade...also no 'safe' community where npds may find their own degree of therapy and comfort, or none I've seen as yet.

I do know that I worried the hell out of me before I decided 'what the hell' and I will pursue this with him; it has helped us in so much as we have a functioning family now, though not of course what I would truly desire....

I hope you did not feel too pressurised to write your history, and that we here can continue to give you support whatever.

I found in my own past- it was fear and longing which held me back.

Not any more!

[David P]

Hey Mud, I am curious about your motive in writing that rather eloquent and well considered disclaimer.
Care to let us in on the reason? If not tell me to button it up..
David P.

[Sela]

Hiya Mud:

This is the voicelessness and emotional survival message board, right?

To me, that means we are allowed to have voices, to speak our thoughts, and we are allowed to be emotional, express emotion.. and that actually doing that helps us survive.  Or else, maybe speaking helps us survive emotionally (the actual putting into words helps us through our emotional responses?).  Or maybe, letting our thoughts have a voice and our emotions survive....we will just feel better.....help ourselves....heal......move on......whatever?

No one said our voices are infallible or the words we choose will always be exact.  There are no rules about what must/must not be emotionally expressed in order to survive.  Plus....this is a message board, where we are all anonymous.

It's ok to say what you FEEL Mud.....regardless or whether or not it's a factual description of anything else.  It's the way we feel that we are giving a voice to, right?  I bet you're not here to deplete anyone of anything but rather to help build something of your self (by claiming your thoughts, giving them voice, feeling your feelings and expressing them etc)??

God bless you Mud and may your brother meet his maker with what he has done and how he has made you feel, what thoughts he has provoked in you by his behaviour, clearly visible in his mind.
God already knows.

Sela

[vunil]

Our mudpup is in legal land-- his post is a legal disclaimer (I am assuming).  That's the reason we don't need to reply; it's just a statement of facts in this forum.

[mudpuppy]

Dearest Vunil,

Bingo!

mud

[Plucky]

Mudpup,
how did it happen that you had to post the disclaimer?  Did your brother find the board?  Are there now lawyers combing the board for infringements on somebody?
Plucky

[write]

well- I don't know any legal precedents as yet for voicing your own concerns which may or may not be true, or for seeking solace for whatever reality or delusion has given you pain.

You name no names, make no claims ( legally ) and as far as I can see you can write what the hell you like.

Hey- I'm a writer.
Who knows what is fact or fiction or falls somewhat in-between...

I do wonder though what fear prompted you to write your disclaimer.

And whether you are yet free maybe not of the N, but of the notion that the N controls all.

[Marta]

Write:
And whether you are yet free maybe not of the N, but of the notion that the N controls all.

OMG Write, what an astute observation! You have described in one line the unnamed syndrome I am afflicted with. Fact is that those who are willing to outrageously lie, throw tantrums like three years old, manipulate and tinker with facts and evidence, and con others do control a lot. Still, that is no reason to give in to paranoia which infects my thinking anytime I find myself sucked  in to the N orbit. It is necessary to not let Ns ruin our belief in human values like Truth and Justice; stripping us of our humanity and faith may indeed be the biggest damage Ns could inflict on us. Thank you Write for the reminder. 

[Sallying Forth]

How the law goes: if an individual reads what you write, identifies themself in it through exact incidents, their physical description and their legal name, then you can be liable. Essentially, you cannot defame someone.

I write also and have read the legalities because I am writing a fictionalization of my autobiography. I have changed the names, somewhat altered the incidents and that is enough to protect me.

[mudpuppy]

Hi guys,

 I am in court with my brother. In order to protect myself in the unlikely event he should find this forum, recognize himself and attempt to use anything I have said against me, for instance in a defamation suit, I have explained to anyone reading that all of my descriptions of my brother are mere personal opinion as personal opinion is not defamatory. And they are merely my opinions. I did not intend to express them as facts.
 I have also explained that my intent was to find a place that he or anyone else we know was unlikely to find themselves to explain that I had no intention of causing him any pain or distress of any sort.
 Those are the sole reasons for my thread, and as vunil said, that is why there is no need for replies.
It is a legal disclaimer and clarification to innoculate me against some frivolous suit he might attempt in the unlikely event he finds or has found this site and should our legal problems escalate.

mud

[Stormchild]

Mud et. al.: for future reference, you can lock your own thread anytime you like. So if you want to post a notice and really don't want replies, you can post it, then lock it. Nobody else can lock a thread, though, except the originator and Dr. G or his board administrator...

Just for info.

[Plucky]

mudpup,
thank you for giving your reasons for posting that. 
Plucky

[seeker]

I BELIEVE IT IS ALWAYS A GOOD IDEA TO TRY AND "CYA" WHEN DEALING WITH AN N!