Hi all:
H&H, here are my answers, 'cause I feel like it (
) and 'cause you bothered to ask, thanks.
... why should you have to explain yourself and your situation to strangers.
I don't have to and I don't do it, usually.
It's none of their business and if they don't understand, sod em.
I agree......and I might actually remember to think that too sometimes.
They don't matter. What matters is that your friends believe you, are there for you!
Yes. That matters. And I know who my friends are too (I think
).
That you have people who understand (which you do on here).
And that helps a lot. Thankyou all who understand and who try to and who share so much.
What have you got to feel guilty for?
As I said, I don't have anything to feel guilty for really but.....when a person, like a nurse calling me on the phone.....uses a derogatory tone like that and implies I've done wrong.....I don't always react the way I'd like to. It's like some visceral part of me responds.....and probably as I suspect you might have already guessed....
maybe it's a learned behaviour? (
) Now where would I learn a response like that? Jeepers.
What have you got to feel ashamed for?
I've done my share of wrong in life but generally speaking...I don't feel an overwhelming amount of guilt or shame over anything. But I do react......as iffffffffffff.......I have done something wrong....sometimes.....when people push the right button.
(hey! That in itself is embarassing! Yep. I react in a way I don't want to. I don't like that. I need retraining!!!)
Not always. Just sometimes. It shocks me. I end up confused...asking myself:
"Now why did I react like that?"
Yep..I think I need a new microchip.......but where do they sell those????
HELP!!!
I don't THINK I have reasons to feel guilt.........I don't carry a big basket of guilt (as far as I am aware)....but I sometimes react, in my gut, by feeling guilty when I haven't done a darn thing wrong.
In that case....I might blush or turn red......I might look down......I might seeeeeeem guilty.
Probably need to get on a couch someplace, stare at the ceiling and dig, shovel...deep deep down......waaaaaaaaay down and back, in the past....to figger out what started all of that.
It's not like it happens that often. I guess discussing this with you just reminded me of it and now I'm wondering again.....like I do after the fact?? Excercising my brain cells eh?
Maybe I'm the only one who does that (react in a way I don't want to sometimes)? Maybe not?
I did feel I was the cause... if I wasn't there, if I didn't exist then they wouldn't be arguing and I definitely felt uncomfortable.
Ahhhhhh! But that's not true!! (it's your belief but it's a debilitating, untrue one, imo). If you weren't there.....they'd still be arguing because they married the wrong person and that's what they did.....that's why the marriage ended......that's the way they deal with problems....they argue. And if it weren't you.....they were arguing about.....it would be about someone else or something else. And if ......it weren't eachother they were arguing with......it would be with someone else. Because those kinds of argumenters feeeeeeeeed off arguing....and I betttttt.....at least one of them....is or would still be.... busy arguing with some other poor sucker about some small person or thing some place.....right now....if the opportunity presented itself.
Not your fault. Not your fault at all ((((H&H)))).
Sela
