People tend to appear and disappear here and we almost never really know what's going on at the time. I tend to worry about folks who vanish, and I'd like to think that others do too.
Just to let you know, I'm going to be around a bit less. Over the weekend I realized that there may be an emotional component to my ulcer developing, having to do with how trapped and isolated I am - and have been for a long time - and how horrendously frustrated I feel by this, and how much I've been suppressing that! - out in realspace.
I do have strong avoidant tendencies, I love solitude and silence, so this has really snuck up on me. But when I sit and look closely at it, I'm in an extremely unhealthy situation, it's been getting exponentially worse recently, and I've been frustrated about it for a long time.
I'm beginning to suspect that if I don't do something concrete about this, my body is going to do something serious about it for me. Except that bodies don't always know when to stop, and mine is apparently so fed up with what I've been tolerating that it's ready to put me in the hospital if I don't pay attention.
I'm going to have to take some of the time I've been spending here and invest it in efforts to escape the trap I'm in and reduce the isolation I'm experiencing. I'll still be checking in, but if I really commit myself to this effort, it means that I won't be here anywhere near as much, and quite possibly not at all on weekends.
Please wish me luck. I'll check in as often as I reasonably can.
